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Keys to a Healthy Marriage - Sayed Saleh Qazwini
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[0:10]my brothers and sisters.
[0:13]Uh my name is Ali Sheh.
[0:14]I will be your host for tonight.
[0:19]Welcome to the AA Mahar majus.
[0:25]Today I stand before you not as a scholar, not as a
[0:28]master of oration.
[0:31]We know who the master of oration is imam ali below the
[0:36]speech of the creator and above the speech of the created beings.
[0:39]But simply I'm here as your brother in faith a servant of
[0:45]the mission of Hussein.
[0:45]Salam and a proud lover of ali.
[0:49]Before we get started uh just a few announcements.
[0:52]Um I think there's uh brother Hassan husband around here who will
[0:58]uh if you like to sponsor one of the nights of the
[1:01]murmur we still have two more nights left so you can reach
[1:03]out to brother Haja Hassan.
[1:06]Uh we spoke about the children up front over here if they
[1:08]want to come up and then uh for on behalf of the
[1:12]Zaware Hussein at Makkah I would like to thank all the sponsors
[1:16]and the supporters of tonight's program especially Hajj Alisad and family Dr.
[1:21]Hussein and Nasin Hussein Marum Hajj Mortad Ahmed Marin of Sister Abid
[1:29]al- Muhammad uh brother Brian Ashkar and family Maruma Haj Fatima Ashkar
[1:38]Haj Mo Hazimi and Haja Dalal Hazimi brother while brother Hamese and
[1:49]other anonymous donors and Alarum Abbas Zarak and Alum Ra Harb please
[1:54]recite a loud salawat followed by surah al fatha for our sponsors
[1:58]and their marin muhammed muhammed a few other announcements before we get
[2:18]started.
[2:19]Uh so tomorrow night, Friday, July the 4th, we have a great
[2:25]uh guest recover over here, Maha Ali Al-Hakim, uh for the Matam
[2:29]and Lethmia.
[2:30]The the program will start right after our English lecture tomorrow.
[2:34]And then for the day of Asha, say had already sent out
[2:37]um the the schedule for that.
[2:42]On Sunday, July 6th, uh we'll be having the Arabic Maktal at
[2:45]10:00 a.m.
[2:46]and then the English Maktal will be at 11:00 a.m.
[2:50]And then there's a special opportunity to help one of our Palestinian
[2:53]brother over here who unfortunately has been diagnosed with a rare type
[2:57]of a blood cancer.
[2:56]He is in need for a stem cell transplant and is looking
[3:01]for a stem cell donor.
[3:03]There's a certain criteria for him to be met for this transplant.
[3:07]Um it has to be a person between the age of 18
[3:10]and 40 with a Middle Eastern background.
[3:14]Uh he's looking for some help.
[3:18]Uh there's a station uh by the prayer room.
[3:19]There's a table over there.
[3:22]If anybody feel like they meet the criteria and they have the
[3:25]heart in them to help this brother out, you can stop by
[3:29]over there for more information.
[3:30]It requires just a simple uh swab of your cheek with a
[3:32]Q-tip.
[3:33]It's not painful.
[3:35]There's no blood draws or anything like that.
[3:37]But if any one of us can help this brother out, that
[3:39]would be a a great thing.
[3:44]Uh you'll be saving another moment's life.
[3:45]All right.
[3:47]So we'll now welcome a short speech from our youth of our
[3:52]community.
[3:53]Brother um Zacharia will reflect on the tears of Kerbala, reminding us
[3:58]that the youngest of the youngest hearts were impacted by the tragedy
[4:02]of Kerbala.
[4:04]Brother Zachary.
[4:09]Allah [Music] Muhammad Ali Muhammad Tonight is the eighth night of Muharam.
[4:39]On this day, water was stopped from reaching Imm Hussein's camp.
[4:44]It was very hot in Kbella.
[4:46]As the days went by, the children became very thirsty.
[4:50]The cry of Allah alash became more frequent.
[4:55]Tonight is the night of Alasim, the 13-year-old son of Imam Hassan.
[5:00]Ashur came to the land of Gerbala.
[5:02]Ali Akbar gave the fajan and everyone prayed the salah.
[5:08]One by one, Imam Hussein's companions went to the battlefield and gave
[5:13]their lives for them.
[5:13]By the time I imam Hussein was left with only his family
[5:18]took permission from his mother to fight.
[5:21]Then he went to his uncle Imam Hussein to ask for his
[5:26]permission to fight.
[5:25]How can I imam Hussein give permission to to his brother's son
[5:31]to die?
[5:30]How can he allow a young child to fight?
[5:34]Gossam, you are young.
[5:36]You are the only child of your mother.
[5:38]Claws, you are my brother's son.
[5:39]I have promised my brother to look after you.
[5:44]My darling Gossam, I cannot allow you to die.
[5:47]Wasim was very disappointed.
[5:47]He wanted He went to his mother for help.
[5:50]His mother reminded him of the letter that his father had left
[5:54]him.
[5:55]I Hussein read the letter from his brother.
[5:58]I Hassan brother Hussein a day will come when Islam will need
[6:02]to be saved by sacrifice.
[6:04]Hussein I will not be alive on that day.
[6:07]However, my son Kasum will be there.
[6:09]It is my wish that Gsum should represent me on that day.
[6:14]My dearest Gossum, how can I stop you now?
[6:17]Go Ksum, go.
[6:16]He took Gam to Lady Zanab.
[6:19]Zanab, bring me the turban of her dear brother Hassan.
[6:21]Hussein dressed Gasim with Hassan's Abbeya and turban.
[6:27]Zanab, look at Kasim.
[6:28]Don't doesn't he look handsome?
[6:29]He just looks like our brother Hassan.
[6:31]Tears flowed from Imm Hussein and Zanab's eyes as they remembered their
[6:36]brother.
[6:36]Hussein then dressed Kawasum with the battlefield uniform and gave him the
[6:41]weapons.
[6:41]A young child with adult weapons.
[6:43]Gasam was so young that his sword touched the ground as he
[6:45]walked.
[6:46]He was the young son of Hassan.
[6:48]He was the grandson of Ali.
[6:51]and he was trained by Abbas.
[6:54]Gossam fought gallantly.
[6:54]He fought a battle history will never forget.
[6:59]One of Yazid's cowardly soldiers came from behind and hit Gossam on
[7:03]the head with a sword.
[7:03]Gossam was covered in blood.
[7:07]The young Gam thirsty for three days could not take it anymore.
[7:10]He fell from his horse.
[7:11]As he fell, he cried out, "Oh, uncle, come quickly.
[7:15]Help me, Uncle." Hussein and Abbas rushed to the battlefield.
[7:18]Abas helped Hussein carry Kasum's trampled body.
[7:22]When Hussein reached the camp, he cried out, "Zanab, help me Zab,
[7:26]my heart is broken.
[7:28]I have no strength left to carry Kasum's body to the tent."
[7:30]Zanab and the woman gathered and mourned the loss of the young
[7:36]Kum, peace be upon the young martyr of Muhammad.
[7:52]Thank you brother Zakaria for that heartfelt recitation.
[7:55]May Allahh accept our tears and be a source of our salvation.
[8:00]Except for our holy prophet sallallahu alaihi wasallam and his immaculate progeny.
[8:06]We all struggle to walk the surikim.
[8:10]We battle our nuffs every day.
[8:15]the temptations of this dunya and the suffocating social currents that try
[8:20]to drown the god consciousness in us.
[8:23]But without our community, our scholars and our spir spiritual guides like
[8:28]say Kaswini, this world would surely assimilate our youth into godlessness and
[8:35]distraction.
[8:35]The modern system is engineered just to do that.
[8:39]As someone myself who grew up in various different states in the
[8:45]United States, I've come to meet and interact with a lot of
[8:50]different communities.
[8:50]One commonality that we all have as Shane Ali Abital is that
[8:56]we have the same struggles.
[8:57]We all want to raise spiritual kids.
[9:00]We want to have a tight-knit community and at the end we
[9:04]all want to be part of the army of Imam Huja.
[9:10]I would tell you that the struggle is real and the struggle
[9:15]is real in this community just as it was for me in
[9:17]Buffalo, New York, in New Hampshire, New Jersey or Long Island, New
[9:24]York.
[9:24]It's the same struggle that we all have.
[9:27]But I would tell you that even though it seems impossible task
[9:31]to reach, but with the unity that we have amongst us and
[9:35]the God consciousness that we have, we can achieve a center where
[9:41]we can all be able to accommodate.
[9:50]In surah Toba, Allah subhanaa tala says, "A mosque founded on piety
[9:57]from the first day is more worthy that you stand in it
[9:59]for prayer.
[10:00]In it are men who love to purify themselves and Allah subhanaa
[10:04]tala loves those who purify themselves." Brother and sisters, we are Shian
[10:13]Alib and we will build this mosque.
[10:15]We will build this community center not for comfort comfort but for
[10:22]survival for truth for Imam Ahmedi for a future generation that will
[10:26]stand firm when the rest of the world will bow.
[10:30]We will not bow.
[10:30]We will stand firm.
[10:33]We will stand behind our imam.
[10:37]We ask Allah subhanaa tala to give us righteous children who will
[10:42]serve our awaited savior.
[10:43]I ask you to respond to this divine call.
[10:47]Support the construction of our new center.
[10:51]We have been granted a special permit by the city.
[10:56]Now is the time that we must all act.
[10:59]We must all get together.
[10:59]We must all be generous.
[11:02]Remember the time when Prophet Muhammad sallallahu alaihi wasallam migrated from Makkah
[11:08]to Medina.
[11:08]Remember the time when he built the masid with his own hands.
[11:13]This is our time.
[11:15]This is our time to build this community center with our hands.
[11:21]Muhammad Aliham.
[11:30]So brothers and sisters, tonight's madal musl is more than remembrance.
[11:36]It is a restoration, a return to our fra and our divine
[11:39]design.
[11:40]Under the banner of B, we gather not just to mourn but
[11:46]to realign our faith to remember that Islam was not was lived
[11:49]not only in massagids but in homes, in marriages, in love and
[11:55]in sacrifice.
[11:55]The title of tonight's uh lecture is keys to a healthy marriage.
[12:01]The topic most urgent in a world where the divine structure of
[12:04]family is under attack.
[12:05]Where the jalik systems seek to invert gender roles, undermine fathers, shame
[12:10]modesty and fracture the sacred bond between husband and wife.
[12:16]Imam Jaffer Saddakisam said, "Every building is built on a foundation and
[12:21]the foundation of Islam is marriage." So tonight we seek more than
[12:24]advice.
[12:25]We seek anchor.
[12:25]We seek the Quranic blueprint.
[12:29]We seek to defend the holy union.
[12:30]And with that it is with and with that it is my
[12:32]distinct honor and pleasure to invite to the member our teacher our
[12:38]respected guide say Ali Kazwini to enlighten us on this vital subject
[12:43]Muhammad Ali Muhammad.
[12:47]Thank you.
[13:02]Alhamdulillah.
[13:30]All mother.
[13:45]Amen.
[13:47]Abdillah [Music] [Music] mama.
[14:24]Fan.
[14:32][Music] [Music] Was he in [Music] Jama?
[15:13]for the love of Im Hussein and his holy household.
[15:45]The human being is a social being.
[15:51]And as we have been mentioning in the past few nights, the
[15:58]more healthy your relationships are in this life, the more successful you
[16:04]will be.
[16:06]And if these relationships are unhealthy, if these relationships are breaking apart,
[16:13]then it will be much more difficult to go up the ladder
[16:21]of success.
[16:20]And we see that the religion of Islam as a religion, as
[16:27]a system, it's giving us a lifestyle on how to build healthy
[16:36]relationships.
[16:35]Islam is a lifestyle and it teaches you how to build healthy
[16:41]relationships beginning with the relationship with God your creator.
[16:43]Islam teaches you how to build a healthy relationship with your Lord.
[16:48]Second, it teaches you how to build healthy relationships with those around
[16:53]you, those in your community, those in your society, your neighbors, your
[16:57]friends, your co-workers.
[17:03]Islam restricts us in a lot of things because I have to
[17:06]preserve the rights of other people.
[17:07]I have to make sure that I don't transgress and oppress.
[17:12]And this is how Islam maintains and supports healthy relationships.
[17:18]And from amongst the most important relationship that a person could have
[17:26]in their lifetime is the relationship with their spouse.
[17:29]The marriage.
[17:31]This is the relationship that sometimes in some marriages lasts a lifetime
[17:36]50 60 years.
[17:40]two strangers they come together and they become close to one another
[17:44]and they reproduce and they have kids and they live a life
[17:49]with one another.
[17:48]This is marriage.
[17:51]And when it comes to the religion of Islam, marriage is regarded
[17:56]not just as a union between two.
[18:00]Marriage is a sacred institute.
[18:02]The hadith of says No foundation and institution has been built in
[18:15]the religion of Islam more beloved to Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala than
[18:20]the foundation of marriage.
[18:24]And says the one who gets married, they have preserved half of
[18:33]their faith.
[18:34]They just need to worry about the second half.
[18:37]And when we see Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala speaking about marriage in
[18:41]the Quran, Allah doesn't speak about it as if it's a contract
[18:44]between two people.
[18:47]Allah subhanana wa ta'ala speaks about it as if it's one of
[18:50]the greatest signs of Allah subhanaa tala.
[18:52]One of the greatest of God's miracles.
[19:07]Allah says it's from amongst the signs of God that he created
[19:13]you in pairs and he brought two genders together so that they
[19:16]may live in sukun and that they may have mercy and love
[19:23]and compassion towards one another.
[19:25]And says marriage is my tradition.
[19:32]and the one who rejects my sunnah this person is not from
[19:37]me.
[19:37]So we see that marriage it's not just a union between two
[19:41]people.
[19:41]It's actually something more spiritual.
[19:43]It's something greater than that.
[19:45]It's something that brings you closer to Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala.
[19:51]You can get closer to God through your marriage.
[19:53]You can fulfill all of your needs within a marriage because marriage
[19:58]is a form of immunity.
[20:02]It's a form of protection.
[20:02]And the human needs, whether they are social needs, psychological needs, emotional
[20:09]needs, physical needs, all of these needs, they are answered through a
[20:17]successful marriage.
[20:17]Now we live in a time where marriages are being tested and
[20:24]many people they find themselves struggling when it comes to the marriage
[20:30]and the threat of a failing marriage is more serious than the
[20:37]threat of wars and catastrophes and pandemics.
[20:41]Because when families break apart, whole societies will fall apart.
[20:45]Whole societies will be destroyed.
[20:46]when one simple family unit is destroyed.
[20:50]And this is why in Islam we have an ethical, a moral,
[20:57]a religious responsibility not only to get married but to preserve that
[21:01]marriage.
[21:02]And Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala does not want me to just survive
[21:05]in my marriage.
[21:07]There are some people their marriage has come to a point where
[21:09]they say you know what kalas I don't want to even enjoy
[21:13]this marriage.
[21:13]Let me just survive.
[21:16]Let me just get through this.
[21:17]But this is not the intent of marriage.
[21:21]Marriage is meant to be a secure place.
[21:24]Marriage is meant to be a sanctuary, a place of love, a
[21:27]place of compassion, a place where everyone feels the comfort of their
[21:35]home.
[21:34]And this is where we look at as an example, his marriage
[21:42]with Khadijah.
[21:41]Or you look at the marriage of Im Ali and Fat to
[21:49]Zah where 30 years after the martyrdom of Fatima to Zah he
[21:53]would remember those days those beautiful days that he was with Fatima
[21:57]and he would say by God she never angered me and I
[22:04]never angered her.
[22:05]Our marriage was so peaceful and loving.
[22:07]And then he says, "And I would look at Fatma and I
[22:19]would forget all of my problems in life.
[22:22]I would forget all of my struggles in life." So my dear
[22:26]brothers and sisters, when it comes to marriage, marriage requires work.
[22:31]Just like any relationship right now, you have a relationship with your
[22:35]co-workers.
[22:36]You have a relationship at work.
[22:38]You have a relationship at school.
[22:40]Any type of relationship.
[22:44]Relationships are not born out of nowhere.
[22:48]They required they require time.
[22:49]They require maintenance.
[22:50]They require attention.
[22:51]They require sacrifice.
[22:54]Any type of relationship you have, if you want to maintain that
[22:59]relationship, then you must do your part.
[23:02]And every person must do their part.
[23:05]Otherwise they will be responsible to be an oppressor in front of
[23:09]Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala on the day of judgment.
[23:12]When we think of oppressor, don't think of a tyrant.
[23:16]Don't think of a king.
[23:17]Sometimes there could be oppression between two married couples.
[23:20]Sometimes there could be and don't be fooled.
[23:24]Wallah this person prays every day.
[23:27]This person goes to Hajj.
[23:30]This person fasts.
[23:29]This person does this and that.
[23:31]Don't be fooled by a person's religiosity.
[23:33]Allah knows what's in the hearts.
[23:35]Allah knows what's in what secretly happens in the homes.
[23:42]Only Allah knows that.
[23:42]There was a man from the companions of Ma.
[23:50]He was a noble companion.
[23:54]He was one of those who was very close to in the
[23:59]masjid.
[24:00]He was number one in the battle.
[24:01]He comes out to defend.
[24:05]He was injured in one of the battles.
[24:07]They take him back to Medina and he passes away.
[24:11]He was a chief in his tribe or this man.
[24:18]He passes away and sall was seen walking on his tiptoes in
[24:27]the tash in the funeral.
[24:30]They tell why he says there's so many angels here.
[24:32]There's so many angels participating in his tashia in his funeral.
[24:38]Then they buried him.
[24:39]his mother.
[24:40]She comes and she says, "Congratulations, oh, you go straight.
[24:43]You have a straight ticket to paradise." Allah tells her, "Don't come
[24:56]and give out heaven on behalf of God.
[24:59]Yes, he might go to heaven, but he is going to have
[25:04]to face the consequences of his actions." And they say that in
[25:09]the home maybe outside he was very kind but in the home
[25:14]he had badl with his family and as a result if there's
[25:18]if there's oppression Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala will take it out Allah
[25:24]subhana wa ta'ala will cleanse the souls before they go to paradise.
[25:28]So my dear brothers and sisters, when it comes to marriage, there
[25:34]are keys to a successful marriage.
[25:36]There are keys to a happy marriage.
[25:39]And if we do what we're supposed to do, if we fulfill
[25:45]our responsibilities and duties, then marriages will be successful.
[25:48]Marriages will be happy marriages.
[25:53]They will be a place of comfort and satisfaction and blessings.
[25:56]But if I don't do my responsibilities, if I don't fulfill my
[25:59]task, I don't do what I'm supposed to do, then of course
[26:03]it's going to be bad.
[26:04]Of course, it's going to suffer and maybe because I am not
[26:07]doing what I need to do, I will be the reason that
[26:10]other people suffer in my life.
[26:12]And that is that is oppression.
[26:14]And Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala might tolerate many things, but Allah subhanahu
[26:20]wa ta'ala will not tolerate towards one another.
[26:24]So my dear brothers and sisters I'm going to mention five points
[26:28]five keys.
[26:29]If we do these in our lives in your marriage you do
[26:36]these you will see that your marriage will become much healthier.
[26:39]Your marriage will become much happier.
[26:41]You'll be able to survive through the challenges and the tests of
[26:46]time.
[26:46]And of course every marriage is tested.
[26:50]Every marriage is shaken.
[26:50]Every day it might be shaken.
[26:52]But if you do this, you might be able to survive the
[26:57]difficulties and the challenges of time.
[26:59]Number one, my dear brothers and sisters is that when people get
[27:06]married, you see the first maybe few months, maybe few years, they
[27:11]call that the honeymoon period.
[27:12]That's the time where everyone is loveydovey with one another.
[27:18]Everyone is ignoring the faults of the other and only looking at
[27:22]the positive things in their partner.
[27:25]This is the time that they are so attached to one another.
[27:30]They display their love and their affection.
[27:33]This is the time that the gifts come out.
[27:35]This is the time that the nice words come out.
[27:37]You see, they're talking on the phone and no one wants to
[27:41]hang up.
[27:42]No, you hang up first.
[27:43]No, you hang up first.
[27:44]No, you hang up first.
[27:47]This is the honeymoon period.
[27:48]You know when you find out when this period ends is that
[27:51]when one person is talking on the phone and beep hung up.
[27:56]That's it.
[27:57]There's no waiting.
[27:57]No, you hang up first or any of that.
[28:00]That's it.
[28:01]That's when you know that the honeymoon period has come to an
[28:06]end.
[28:07]Or for example, you see some newlyweds when they first got married,
[28:11]she writes on her phone, instead of writing her husband's name, she
[28:18]writes, she writes Albi, Habibi.
[28:20]She writes that then suddenly you go and you look at her
[28:23]phone and you see Saddam is calling her.
[28:27]This is this is when you know things have changed.
[28:31]This is when you know the honeymoon period is done with.
[28:36]But my dear brothers and sisters, if you want your marriage to
[28:44]survive, if you want your marriage to carry on year after year
[28:47]after year, you have to follow the sunnah of Allah and the
[28:54]imams of the B by allowing that period to continue.
[28:56]Affection is not something that only the softies do.
[29:04]Affection is something that even would display.
[29:08]Love and affection and kind words and being a good person.
[29:14]This is something that is Islamic before it is something that is
[29:17]cultural.
[29:18]Before it's something that you have to do, you know, just when
[29:20]you're being nice.
[29:22]No, this is Islamic.
[29:22]This is what the religion of Islam teaches us.
[29:26]This is what the Quran teaches us.
[29:27]To be kind in your words, to show affection, to display affection.
[29:32]There's no shame in displaying affection towards your family.
[29:37]Yes.
[29:38]Outside the house, no.
[29:39]Outside the house, there are limits on our speech, on our tone,
[29:45]on the way that we dress, on the way that we talk
[29:46]to one another.
[29:48]Yes, these are the rules of hijab.
[29:49]And this is how we preserve a community and preserve a society.
[29:52]But inside the house, this is the place for affection.
[29:56]This is the place for love.
[29:58]This is the place for compassion.
[29:59]And the hadith of he says if you as a husband you're
[30:16]able to bring happiness in your family or you as a wife
[30:19]you're able to make your husband happy.
[30:22]Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala will give you the reward of freeing a
[30:29]slave in the way of Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala.
[30:30]In another hadith from Imuk he says he says that a man
[30:45]will receive man will receive you don't just get points with your
[30:49]wife you get points with God.
[30:54]You show your love, you display your love towards your wife, Allah
[31:00]will give you a reward.
[31:00]And to be playful, to be kind, to be easygoing.
[31:05]You don't have to always be Mr.
[31:08]Tough Guy.
[31:09]You could be kind and easygoing and this is how Allah subhanahu
[31:12]wa ta'ala will give you a reward.
[31:15]Similarly for a wife just to display her beauty just to display
[31:23]her beauty towards her husband Allah subhana wa ta'ala will reward her.
[31:27]But today we live in a society where the beauty is displayed
[31:30]outside the house.
[31:32]All of the best clothes, the best dresses, they're worn outside the
[31:36]house and inside the house it's just anything goes.
[31:39]And this is the problem in Islam.
[31:42]It's supposed to be the opposite.
[31:44]display that beauty within the home.
[31:45]This is how you could preserve and show the affection within the
[31:52]marriage by allowing that honeymoon period to continue by displaying that love
[31:57]and affection.
[31:56]And this is what the religion teaches us.
[31:59]Second, my dear brothers and sisters, a key ingredient to a happy
[32:08]marriage, to a thriving marriage is communication.
[32:11]You must be able to communicate properly.
[32:14]In fact, no relationship will last without proper communication with your work,
[32:19]with your school, with your friends.
[32:20]If there's no communication, if there's no clear line of communication, no
[32:26]relationship will last.
[32:28]But today, we see some people they're okay to talk to the
[32:31]whole world, but they can't talk to their spouse.
[32:34]As soon as the conversation with the spouse begins, the phones come
[32:38]out and they cannot listen.
[32:40]They cannot pay attention.
[32:43]They cannot talk.
[32:42]And this is a problem.
[32:46]This is a sign of a failing marriage.
[32:49]This is why you need to be able to communicate properly in
[32:53]order for any relationship to survive.
[32:56]Specifically marriage.
[32:57]This is the most important relationship that you have.
[33:00]The most important relationship in this dunya that you have is with
[33:05]your partner, with your spouse, the husband and the wife.
[33:09]And we need to learn how to communicate.
[33:11]And there's an art of communication.
[33:14]The first step of communicating is you have to be able to
[33:20]listen.
[33:21]You have to take the time to listen.
[33:23]You have to be able to sit and remove all of the
[33:25]distractions.
[33:26]You know, some men, they find it very difficult to listen because
[33:30]we could only do one thing at a time.
[33:34]I know for the sisters, they could multitask.
[33:35]She could be cooking.
[33:38]She could be taking care of the kid.
[33:40]She could be helping the child with the homework and she's listening
[33:43]at the same time.
[33:45]Men are made in a way where you have to move all
[33:48]distractions.
[33:48]You can't be on your phone.
[33:50]You can't be watching TV and listening at the same time.
[33:55]This is why in Islam it's very important to set time to
[33:58]set quality time talking to one another.
[34:06]Allah says for one of you to have quality time with your
[34:11]family this is better than the ofasool.
[34:14]So put distractions aside and sit and listen.
[34:18]Second in order to listen my dear brothers and sisters you need
[34:26]to build trust.
[34:25]So you need to build trust in order to communicate properly.
[34:29]Sometimes trust is broken and when trust is broken it's really hard
[34:36]and it takes time to be built in once again.
[34:38]Sometimes you need to build that trust.
[34:41]It takes effort.
[34:43]It takes time and there are certain things that people do that
[34:48]will tear apart the trust within a relationship and then they say
[34:52]I can't communicate.
[34:52]Yeah, you can't communicate because you are doing certain things that take
[34:57]away the trust and then no one's going to want to communicate
[35:03]with you.
[35:01]One of the most damaging things that a person could do within
[35:08]a marriage, within a relationship, is go and expose their private secrets
[35:12]at home.
[35:11]Go and tell all their friends and tell all their girls and
[35:16]and their friends and all their This is some of the most
[35:18]damaging things that a person could do.
[35:21]And it's haram.
[35:23]And it's haram.
[35:23]You find a lot of times people they have problems in the
[35:27]home and then they go and they talk about it outside the
[35:29]home.
[35:30]Even if you're talking to your mother, it might be a problem.
[35:35]If you're talking to someone outside the circle, it might be a
[35:39]problem.
[35:40]You're go you're exposing someone else's secrets.
[35:42]Yes, if you're being oppressed, then you have the right to speak.
[35:47]But sometimes going and talking about certain things that are not necessarily
[35:52]going to help you and you're talking about it.
[35:55]This is gossip.
[35:58]This falls under the line of gossip.
[36:01]And the hadith of Allah he says from the worst people on
[36:10]the day of judgment in the eyes of God.
[36:17]A man he has he goes to his wife and his wife
[36:20]comes to him and then he comes and he exposes her secret.
[36:24]He comes and he tells everyone this is something that is haram
[36:27]and this is something that is ethical and this is from the
[36:31]ones that are the worst people on the day of judgment.
[36:34]So when we talk about trust, trust needs to be built and
[36:39]we have to be very careful from our actions that might take
[36:42]away the trust from amongst the actions that take away the trust
[36:49]is when you lie to one another.
[36:51]Lying lying to another person, you lie once, twice, they're not going
[36:55]to trust you anymore.
[36:57]Then if the line of communication is broken, don't be surprised because
[37:03]you lied because you cannot keep your word.
[37:06]And when a person lies once and twice, the hadith says a
[37:09]person lies once and twice and three times then this person will
[37:14]be written down as a kadab.
[37:15]That's it.
[37:16]You're a liar now.
[37:18]Now, how could I trust someone who's a liar?
[37:20]How could I communicate with someone that lies?
[37:24]Another is having assumptions, wrong assumptions of a person.
[37:29]This is also something that breaks a trust.
[37:31]Your two people always one person assumes the worst in the other.
[37:38]Always assumes that oh you're you're doing this and you're doing that
[37:41]behind my back.
[37:41]And this is also something that is destructive.
[37:45]Have Allah subhana wa ta'ala says in the Quran Allah says refrain
[37:56]from van refrain from assumptions because some of it is haram some
[38:00]of it is is a sin and this is something that we
[38:07]have to be very careful with.
[38:09]Have assume the best.
[38:10]Make it a habit to assume the best.
[38:15]And this is the Islamic thing to do because if you didn't
[38:17]see with your eyes, if you didn't hear yourself, the always assume
[38:21]the best.
[38:22]Don't always make a quick judgment.
[38:24]Assume the best.
[38:26]And this is a key element to saving and preserving relationships.
[38:29]If I'm going to assume the worst in people, then not no
[38:33]relationship is going to last.
[38:36]You know, there was a man, he would assume the best.
[38:39]He would always have with his family.
[38:42]Maybe he went a little bit overboard.
[38:45]One day he goes to work and he has a black eye
[38:48]and they tell him, "Why do you have a black eye?" He
[38:53]says, "My wife, she threw roses at me." They tell him, "Throwing
[38:55]roses doesn't cause a black eye." He says, "She forgot.
[39:00]She forgot them in the vase.
[39:01]That's why he had good assumptions.
[39:02]He had good lun and his wife." So this is an example
[39:12]of always assuming the best and he says the mmin will give
[39:20]another mmin 70 excuses.
[39:21]70 excuses meaning one excuse after another after another.
[39:27]Always assume the best.
[39:33]Another um act that might remove the trust is when people spy
[39:36]on one another.
[39:38]And this probably happens.
[39:39]This probably happens the most in a marriage.
[39:42]When one is spying on the other, what are you doing on
[39:44]your phone?
[39:45]What are you doing on your laptop?
[39:46]And this is also something that is destructive.
[39:50]Allah subhana wa ta'ala in verse 12 Allah says this rule this
[40:14]verse verse 12 of it gives you a solution to many social
[40:18]problems.
[40:19]s many marriage problems.
[40:23]Assume the best.
[40:24]Don't spy on one another.
[40:26]Don't backbite.
[40:28]Don't gossip.
[40:27]Don't lie.
[40:28]These are all ways that we could build a stronger and healthier
[40:33]connection within the family.
[40:35]So this is number two.
[40:36]Number one, we said try to prolong the honeymoon period.
[40:42]Number two, communicate better.
[40:43]Number three, my dear brothers and sisters, in order for a marriage
[40:47]to survive, in order for a marriage to thrive, you should not
[40:53]compare in a marriage.
[40:55]This is also something that is very destructive.
[40:58]You see people, they're always saying, "Oh, you see, they just bought
[41:02]this, we need to buy that.
[41:04]They just did this.
[41:05]They went on this honeymoon.
[41:05]They went on this vacation here.
[41:08]They did this.
[41:10]They did that." always looking at what other people are doing.
[41:13]This, my dear brothers and sisters, this is going to take any
[41:18]ounce of happiness that you have in your heart is going to
[41:20]take it away.
[41:22]It's going to leave leave you feeling miserable when you're always looking
[41:25]at what other people have.
[41:27]Always looking at what other people are doing.
[41:30]Number one, it breeds in gratitude.
[41:32]Meaning, I'm never going to be thankful because I'm always looking at
[41:36]what other people are doing.
[41:36]I'm always looking at what other people bought, where other people went
[41:41]on vacation, what type of dress he bought his wife, and where
[41:44]did she how did she speak to his wife and this is
[41:49]this is something that breeds in gratitude and it takes away the
[41:53]and Allah says in the Quran, "If you thank, I will give
[41:59]you more, but I'm unable to be thankful anymore when I'm always
[42:02]looking at what other people are doing." Number two, it creates insecurity
[42:07]and detachment.
[42:08]Now, no one is feeling safe because anything I do, oh, they
[42:14]did this, they did that.
[42:14]So, no one feels safe and slowly you become detached from one
[42:18]another.
[42:19]Slowly you don't feel that closeness with one another.
[42:25]Number three, it breeds and jealousy in your heart.
[42:27]When I'm looking at what other people are doing, I start becoming
[42:31]jealous of them.
[42:32]I start hating them even though they didn't do anything wrong but
[42:35]I start hating them and I start looking at them and despising
[42:38]them.
[42:39]Why?
[42:40]Because well her husband took care of her or she was a
[42:44]good wife.
[42:44]Someone something good happened in their life.
[42:46]This is wrong.
[42:49]It starts making me feel into a miserable person.
[42:52]Now I'm looking at what's in the hearts and and and and
[42:54]in the lives of other people.
[42:57]Number four, my dear brothers and sisters, it create looking at what's
[43:04]in the hands of others, it creates a false perception of happiness.
[43:08]Well, they just bought a car.
[43:10]That means they're happy.
[43:10]That means they have no problems in their lives.
[43:13]That means all their problems are zero.
[43:15]Who said that?
[43:15]Who said they're happy?
[43:18]They are struggling the same way I'm struggling.
[43:20]They are going through a challenge in their life the same way
[43:24]I'm going through a challenge in my life.
[43:27]Is there anyone that is fully happy?
[43:29]But when we are fixated on what other people have, we start
[43:32]looking at that and we start focusing on that and we start
[43:36]hating the other person and we think that they have happiness when
[43:38]I'm not really sure that they have happiness.
[43:41]Every person is struggling in one way or another in this life.
[43:46]Every person is being tested.
[43:49]Don't think that other people wa they have something then that means
[43:54]Allah is not testing them and God only has a problem with
[43:56]me.
[43:57]Allah is only taking it out on me.
[43:59]No.
[44:00]This is why the verse in the Quran says don't stretch your
[44:17]hands to what?
[44:19]Don't stretch your eyes to what's in the hands of other people
[44:22]because we are surely testing them with what they have.
[44:26]You look, they look very comfortable.
[44:28]You look at them on Instagram.
[44:29]You look at them on, you know, the pictures that they post
[44:32]online.
[44:32]Of course, when people post pictures, they only post the best pictures.
[44:35]They don't post the fights that happen behind the scenes.
[44:40]They don't post all of the ugliness.
[44:41]They just come and bring out what is their best.
[44:44]They don't post everything else.
[44:48]They only post what they want you to see.
[44:49]And you come and you look at them and you say, "Look,
[44:51]they're so happy." No, they're being tested with what they have.
[44:55]The same way I am being tested.
[45:00]So this is the third point to not compare because when you
[45:03]compare, you begin to hate your life and you begin to live
[45:08]a life of ingratitude and that will take you out of your
[45:14]iman.
[45:12]even not only will it will it test your marriage, it will
[45:16]test your own iman and your faith and your personality and no
[45:18]one wants that.
[45:20]So this is another point and always be happy with what Allah
[45:26]subhana wa t'ala has given you.
[45:27]Always surrender to what Allah subhanana wa ta'ala has done.
[45:29]Number four, my dear brothers and sisters, for any relationship to survive,
[45:37]we have to be able to look past certain things that have
[45:41]happened, especially in a marriage, you have to be willing and you
[45:48]have to be able to forgive.
[45:49]Holding a grudge, this is going to be very harmful for you
[45:55]before anyone else.
[45:56]Why would anyone want to hold a grudge for 30 years, 20
[46:01]years, 10 years?
[46:03]You know, there are some people, they always remember, they always bring
[46:07]out old files.
[46:06]You know, we're talking about something, they come and they pull out
[46:11]a old file.
[46:11]Remember what you did on this this date?
[46:13]Remember what you said?
[46:17]This is damaging.
[46:17]This is destructive.
[46:18]Imagine you're constantly reminding yourself of a bitter memory.
[46:24]Imagine you had a nightmare and you constantly remind yourself of that
[46:28]nightmare.
[46:28]Why would you do that to yourself?
[46:30]This is something that is going to cause continuous pain for yourself.
[46:34]You don't want that.
[46:35]You don't need that.
[46:36]Every day Allah subhana wa ta'ala is a blessing for Allah is
[46:40]giving you.
[46:41]That's a blessing for you.
[46:43]Think of the blessings in life.
[46:44]So not forgiving this causes continued pain in the person that is
[46:49]holding the grudge.
[46:51]This is number one.
[46:51]Number two, it will not allow the relationship to heal.
[46:57]If I'm always bringing about and always reminding of old events, old
[47:03]issues that happened, this is not going to allow the relationship to
[47:06]heal because we always come back to the same story.
[47:10]The same story.
[47:10]Remember what you did 10 years ago?
[47:12]Always bringing back that old thing that happened.
[47:19]And when you do that, when you continuously remind yourself and remind
[47:24]everyone in the room, remember what happened, you're going to look at
[47:28]your partner, whether it's the husband or the wife, in bad light.
[47:31]That means this man who you married or this lady who you
[47:37]married, this person, when you're only associating them with that memory, you're
[47:40]going to hate them.
[47:43]Do you want to live with someone that you hate?
[47:46]Do you want to live with someone that your perspective of this
[47:49]person has been altered as a result of your own memories that
[47:52]you keep bringing up?
[47:55]Think of positive memories.
[47:55]Yes, he did something wrong.
[47:57]She did something wrong.
[47:59]But they've also had a lot of good things in life.
[48:00]A lot of good things have happened.
[48:02]Bring up the good files as well.
[48:04]Don't only remember the bad.
[48:07]But this is the nature of human beings.
[48:10]We only remember the negative.
[48:11]We suddenly when it comes to remembering the good things, we have
[48:14]Alzheimer's.
[48:15]That's it.
[48:15]We don't remember the good things.
[48:19]We only remember the bad.
[48:20]And this is damaging and destructive.
[48:22]And finally, it goes against the essence of the marriage.
[48:25]When Allah talks about marriage, Allah says Allah places ma love and
[48:40]mercy.
[48:40]This is the ingredient for a successful marriage.
[48:42]When I'm only thinking of bad things, I'm removing any ounce of
[48:49]ma.
[48:47]I'm removing any type of rahma within the relationship.
[48:51]And this is going against the essence of a relationship.
[48:54]And finally it goes against the teachings of Islam and the teachings
[49:02]of Sai and that is to forgive people.
[49:03]Forgive I know it's hard but sometimes for the sake of a
[49:11]better future for the sake of opening a new chapter for the
[49:16]sake of allowing another day giving another day a chance to survive
[49:19]and to carry on.
[49:22]You have to be willing to forgive.
[49:23]And this is not just between spouses.
[49:25]This is between friends, between people.
[49:27]And Allah subhana wa ta'ala tells us in the Quran, let them
[49:37]forgive.
[49:38]Let them look past certain things.
[49:40]Don't you want God to forgive you?
[49:42]Don't you want Allah to forgive you?
[49:44]If you want God to forgive you, if I expect God, I
[49:48]say forgive me, but I'm not willing to forgive a single person,
[49:51]then how is Allah going to forgive me?
[49:53]That means if I forgive, Allah will forgive me as well.
[49:59]And I will be living at peace, I will be able to
[50:01]live a more comfortable life.
[50:04]And number five, my dear brothers and sisters, and the final point
[50:09]which we will mention is when you get married, my dear brothers
[50:12]and sisters, why do we do a kbikab and we we do
[50:16]a and a marriage and all of that?
[50:18]Why can't you just find someone in the street and marry this
[50:20]person?
[50:21]Why?
[50:22]Because you want Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala to be in the equation.
[50:26]You want God to bless your marriage.
[50:29]You want God to make you halal upon one another.
[50:33]And similarly, just like you want God to make you halal upon
[50:36]one another, have God be in the marriage.
[50:38]Have God be in the family.
[50:42]Not just on the day of the we put a Quran out
[50:43]and we we we bring it out.
[50:46]No.
[50:47]Have the Quran judge between your life every day in your marriage.
[50:50]Have the Quran be and God be the one that is determining
[50:54]what decisions we make in life.
[50:57]And believe me, if you do that, you will live a happy
[51:00]marriage because Allah subhana wa ta'ala makes rules that only bring our
[51:05]happiness and our success.
[51:08]That's how the marriage will survive and thrive.
[51:11]And when God is not in the equation, then anything could happen.
[51:16]There's no moralities, there's no boundaries, there's no ethics because God is
[51:21]not there.
[51:22]This is why when a man came to propose, excuse me, a
[51:27]man, he had daughters and he asked Im Hussein.
[51:28]He tells him, "I have daughters and men, they come, they propose
[51:32]to me, who should I give my daughter to?" Imm Hussein tells
[51:35]him, "Give your daughters to someone that fears God.
[51:40]Someone that God is in his life." Why?
[51:43]Because even if he became angry, upset, he knows God is watching.
[51:46]He's restricted.
[51:50]Muslimb when he was in Kufa he came in the house tells
[51:59]him hide behind the door and kill him as soon as he
[52:01]comes.
[52:03]Muslim he says no because says meaning now me if I'm a
[52:10]m I will not backst step I will not betray if I
[52:13]am going to fight him I'll fight him head on I'm not
[52:15]going to fight him behind his back so im and someone who's
[52:21]a mman they're restricted and confined by the rules of god even
[52:24]though the rules of the marriage are being broken the respect within
[52:28]the marriage is not there anymore but the rules of God are
[52:33]still therefore this person has boundaries and they're not going to break
[52:35]the boundaries.
[52:36]And this is what a person should do.
[52:40]This is why a verse came down in the Quran.
[52:43]Some of the wives of the prophet, they were giving Allah a
[52:48]difficult time.
[52:47]Allah subhanana wa ta'ala brought down a whole surah threatening them and
[52:54]telling them if you want to be with the prophet, if you
[52:56]want to be with God, you remain with Allah.
[52:58]But if you don't want that then come Allah will divorce you.
[53:03]Have God be in the relationship.
[53:09]This will give you success in this and in the if you
[53:20]want if you want come I'll divorce you.
[53:23]If you want the then stay.
[53:24]You will have success in this dunya and in the and this
[53:31]is what it does.
[53:32]When God is in the equation, love will be there.
[53:36]Affection will be there and the marriage will thrive and will survive
[53:41]the most difficult challenges that it could face.
[53:45]IM he says one day a man came to and he tells
[53:54]the prophet Muhammad he tell he tells I have a wife when
[54:14]I come to the house, she stands at the door waiting for
[54:19]me.
[54:20]And when I'm walking outside the house, she walks me out of
[54:26]the house.
[54:36]And if she saw that I'm sad, she tells me, "Wait, if
[54:40]you're worried about risk, if you're worried about sustenance, about money, about
[54:45]work, don't worry about that.
[54:46]Someone else has taken care of that." And that is Allah subhanahu
[54:51]wa ta'ala.
[54:56]and and if you're worried about your that's what's stressing you then
[55:00]inshallah you're stressed even more over the so this is all that
[55:07]she did one she welcomes him she walks him out if she
[55:10]sees him stressed she tells him what are you stressed over are
[55:14]you stressed over money don't worry about it are you stressed over
[55:17]the then yes continue worrying about it he tells tells that man,
[55:29]tell her you're going to paradise and tell her you are from
[55:44]those who work in the way of God and for every day
[55:49]you receive the reward of 70 martyrs.
[55:52]This is how Allah subhana wa ta'ala makes rules and these rules
[55:58]are to protect the sanctity and protect the marriage and keep the
[56:03]marriage intact by doing these type of things.
[56:06]You know a man has to actually go and become a shahid
[56:08]to receive the reward of a shahid.
[56:10]A lady could do these four things and she gets the reward
[56:15]of 70 shuada and then they come and they say Islam is
[56:18]being unfair.
[56:20]This is an opportunity that Allah subhana wa ta'ala has given to
[56:24]women.
[56:25]You do that and Allah subhana wa ta'ala will give you heaven
[56:28]and give you the reward of 70.
[56:32]This is why my dear brothers and sisters, have God be in
[56:37]your life.
[56:39]Have God be in the equation.
[56:39]If God is in the equation, your marriage is going to be
[56:42]at peace.
[56:43]Does that mean that your marriage is not going to be tested?
[56:47]No.
[56:46]Marriage is going to be tested.
[56:49]your life is going to be tested.
[56:51]But if God is in the equation, you'll be able to survive
[56:53]the test of time.
[56:55]And this is why my dear brothers and sisters, we need to
[57:01]raise our families with God being at the focal point with with
[57:04]God being at the center.
[57:08]This is what IM Hussein did.
[57:09]Imm Hussein, he took his whole family to Kbala.
[57:14]He didn't say this is just a one-man job.
[57:15]This is a duty that only I have to do.
[57:17]No.
[57:17]Imm Hussein, he took his whole family and they were all on
[57:22]the same page.
[57:21]No one from his family, the young, the old, no one came
[57:26]and objected and said, "Why are we doing this?
[57:27]Why do we have to go through this?" All of them.
[57:28]It was a family effort.
[57:32]And this is why every day we remember the companions of Imam
[57:35]Hussein and the family of Im Hussein.
[57:40]You see in this life families are separated, family bonds are broken
[57:45]because of conflict.
[57:47]On the day of Ash families were separated because of their love
[57:51]for Imam Hussein.
[57:52]The mother lost her son and a man he loses his son
[57:58]and she loses her husband and the children were killed on the
[58:03]day of Ash because of their love for Im Hussein.
[58:07]My dear brothers and sisters, tonight tonight is a night that we
[58:15]honor Im Hassan.
[58:13]And we remember Im Hassan who was present on the day of
[58:20]Ash through his children.
[58:21]Five of the children of Im Hassan.
[58:26]Five of the boys of Im Hassan were present on the day
[58:29]of Ash.
[58:29]Three of them were killed.
[58:31]Two of them survived.
[58:33]Just as I im Hussein lost two of his sons Abdah Ali
[58:38]Akbar and Abdah Akbar who we will remember tomorrow and Abdah who
[58:43]we will remember the eve of Ash.
[58:45]Im Hassan three of his sons were killed on the day of
[58:53]Ash and Im Hassan.
[58:53]Today some people they come and they differentiate between Imam Hassan and
[58:57]IM Hussein.
[58:59]They say Imam Hassan he was a man of peace and Imam
[59:01]Hussein was a man who was angry and he went after fighting
[59:05]and after war.
[59:06]Imam Hassan he ordered his sons to be with Imam Hussein as
[59:10]we will see on the day of Ash that family that family
[59:15]of Im Hassan made such a huge sacrifice for the cause of
[59:22]Islam for the cause of Imam Hussein.
[59:24]Imm Hassan had five sons.
[59:27]One of them from the first two who were not killed, one
[59:33]of them was Al Hassan Hassan.
[59:35]They call him Al Hassan Mu Al Hassan Hassan.
[59:41]He entered into the battle and he he had he was older
[59:47]and he was married to Fatima, the daughter of Im Hussein.
[59:50]Fatimb Hussein and on the day of Ash he was with Im
[59:57]Hussein.
[59:58]He fought, he was injured, he was struck 18 times and they
[60:01]say his hand was cut off but then he fell to the
[60:06]ground.
[60:06]After Imam Hussein was killed, they came and they realized he's still
[60:10]breathing.
[60:11]They came and they realized he's still alive.
[60:12]He had uncles from his mother's side.
[60:14]They were on the side of the enemies.
[60:16]They came and they said, "That's it.
[60:19]Imm Hussein is killed.
[60:19]he's our nephew.
[60:21]We will not allow you to fight him.
[60:24]And they took him to Kufa.
[60:25]They cured him and he ends up going back to Medina and
[60:26]he lives a long life.
[60:29]And he narrates many of the events that took place on the
[60:32]day of Ashass.
[60:33]And Allah wanted to preserve the lineage of Im Hassan through him
[60:39]even though he was injured on the day of Ash.
[60:41]Another from the children of Imam Hassan perhaps he was the youngest
[60:48]of the children of Im Hassan.
[60:49]His name is Hassan.
[60:51]He was considered with the young children.
[60:54]He was probably 10 years old because I imm Im Hassan he
[60:59]passed away in the year 50 after hijra IM Hussein year 61
[61:03]he was probably 10 years old and he was with the he
[61:09]was taken to Sham and he was kept with the woman and
[61:14]the children this is a second son and then you have a
[61:17]third son who was killed on the day of Ash his name
[61:23]is Abdullah Akbar Abdullah the eldest because Im Hassan had Abdah and
[61:28]Abdullah Akbar and his what they call him his was Abu Bakr.
[61:35]Im Hassam some people say Im Hassan he named his son Abu
[61:38]Bakr.
[61:39]No Abu Bakr is a ka for anyone whose name is Abdullah
[61:45]they call him Abu Bakr.
[61:46]And this young man Abdullah al Akbar he was married to Suka
[61:51]the daughter of Im Hussein.
[61:53]These the the sons of Imam Hassan they were all under the
[61:58]custody of Im Hussein after their father was killed and passed away
[62:03]and Abdullah Hassan he went out and they say he began to
[62:09]call out if you don't recognize me then I am the son
[62:16]of He began to fight them until he was killed and Imm
[62:33]Hussein wept over him.
[62:34]You have the fourth son of Im Hassan.
[62:38]Abdullah algar Hassan.
[62:42]This child was probably 11 years old on the day of Ash.
[62:48]They when you read the Maktal they mention his story right before
[62:54]I imam Hussein was killed because he came in the picture after
[62:58]Imam Hussein had fallen from his horse.
[63:02]Imam Hussein was in a pool of his own blood and these
[63:05]wicked men they would come and they would take strikes at Im
[63:12]Hussein.
[63:10]This young man Abdullah Hassan he began to run out of the
[63:18]tent and say Zanab was holding on to his hand and Im
[63:21]Hussein is looking towards the camp and he he tells her Zabs
[63:26]oh Zanab hold on to him but he slips from the hands
[63:29]of Zanab and he runs to Im Hussein seeing his uncle in
[63:35]that state and he sees a wicked man striking Imm Hassan on
[63:39]striking ing Imm Hussein and he puts his hand in front of
[63:45]the sword.
[63:46]11 years old, he puts his hand in front of the sword
[63:48]and he tells him Hussein, "Oh son of the wicked woman, you
[63:56]want to kill my uncle Hussein?" The sword strikes his hand and
[64:02]his hand begins to hang on the skin and then he looks
[64:06]at his uncle Im Hussein and he tells him, "Yeah, look what
[64:10]they have done to me." Im Hussein tells him, "Be patient.
[64:24]Oh, be patient.
[64:26]You're not going to see a difficult day after this day.
[64:31]After today, you're going to be with your father and with your
[64:35]grandfather with Allah.
[64:38]As this young child was in the hands of Im Hussein on
[64:44]the ground, Imam Hussein can't stand anymore.
[64:47]At that moment, he takes out his arrow and he strikes and
[64:52]he kills the young boy in the hand of his uncle Im
[64:59]Hussein.
[64:58]These are the mas.
[65:02]Imm Hussein he witnessed all of his family.
[65:05]18 members from the family of Abah Abdah.
[65:09]Even the young children were butchered on the day of Ash.
[65:12]And the fifth from the children of Im Hassan is the one
[65:17]who we remember tonight Hassim was probably 13 years old.
[65:25]They say meaning he had not gone through the age of puberty
[65:28]yet.
[65:29]And on the eve of Im Hussein he tells his companions to
[65:36]leave me.
[65:38]Go take this night the darkness of this night and leave.
[65:41]You don't need to stay.
[65:41]They all tell him, "Yeah, how could we leave you?" Ya Abdah,
[65:47]what is the value of life after you?
[65:49]He tells them, "If you stay, you're going to be killed." Alasim,
[65:55]he didn't know.
[65:55]Is he going to be considered with the adults or is he
[65:59]going to be considered with the children?
[66:01]So he comes to Im Hussein and he tells him, "Yeah, Abdah,
[66:05]am I also going to be killed tomorrow?" Im Hussein tells him,
[66:10]"Oh my nephew, how do you see death?" He tells him in
[66:24]defending you, "Death is sweeter than honey." Im Hussein tells him, "Then
[66:30]you will also be killed." Oh my dear nephew on the day
[66:33]of Ashim after he saw the the companions and Bani Hashim after
[66:41]he saw Ali Akbar carried back into pieces.
[66:44]He comes to Im Hussein and he tells him, "Oh my master,
[66:51]please give me permission to go out and fight." Imm Hussein tells
[66:54]him, "Oh, Kasim, you are the reminder of my brother Im Hassan,
[66:59]how can I let you go?" Al Kasim began to beg Im
[67:05]Hussein.
[67:06]But El Kasim, he goes out and he pulls a letter in
[67:11]a safe that was written for him from his father, Im Hassan.
[67:14]He brings it out.
[67:17]He opens it and the letter tells him, "Oh my dear son
[67:19]Kasim." This was a letter Im Hassan wrote to his son.
[67:25]He tells him, "Oh my dear son, if you see your uncle
[67:27]Abdah in a difficult situation in difficulties, then do not hesitate in
[67:34]supporting your uncle." He came and he showed this letter to Im
[67:42]Hussein.
[67:43]Imm Hussein began to cry.
[67:44]He tells say, "Bring me the turban of my brother Im Hassan.
[67:48]Bring me the sword of my brother Im Hassan." He places the
[67:55]turban.
[67:56]He places the armor on Hassan.
[67:57]He is a young child.
[68:01]They begin to beg him to remain.
[68:03]They begin to beg him to not go.
[68:06]But Alasim is determined to be in support of Imam.
[68:11]to be in support of Im Hussein Ali.
[68:13]He goes out Muslim.
[68:16]He says, "We saw a boy.
[68:18]He came out of the camp.
[68:22]His face was shining like the moon." And he says, "We saw
[68:27]Im Hussein hug him and they began to cry until they both
[68:30]fell to the ground." [Music] He came out.
[68:37]He carried his sword.
[68:39]He stood in front of the enemies and he began to say,
[68:47]"If you do not recognize me, then know that I am the
[68:52]son of IM Hass.
[69:10]He does a dua against them and he begins to fight them
[69:16]courageously.
[69:17]He begins to fight them.
[69:18]He kills several men.
[69:21]He was there.
[69:23]He comes and he tells He tells one of the narrators.
[69:27]He tells him, "I'm going to make I'm going to break his
[69:30]mother's heart by killing him." He tells him, "Why don't you leave
[69:34]him?
[69:34]Don't you see all of these other men fighting him?" He says,
[69:40]"No, I'm going to do that." Alasim, his sho, his sandal strap
[69:43]breaks in the middle of the battle.
[69:44]He puts his head down.
[69:48]He closes his sandal strap.
[69:49]This wicked man, he comes and he strikes Kasim on his head.
[69:53]Alasim falls to the ground and he calls out Abdahi.
[70:02]Oh my uncle come to my aid.
[70:08]Im Hussein.
[70:07]He rushed to him and he found his killer and he killed
[70:12]him.
[70:13]Then he came and he sat at the body of Alimis.
[70:17]The narration says that he was injured and he was dying.
[70:24]His feet began to kick on the ground.
[70:29]Hussein, he tells him, Im Hussein he sat at the body of
[70:59]and he tells him it breaks my heart that you called upon
[71:01]me and I am unable to help you.
[71:05]Im Hussein he began to carry alim they saw Im Hussein was
[71:14]carrying and his back was bent that means Imam Hussein's heart was
[71:19]broken he carried him he brought him to the tent Y Alf
[72:07]Hussein, he brought him and he placed him in the tent next
[72:13]to Ali Akbar.
[72:15]Imm Hussein.
[72:13]One second he looks at Ali and he cries.
[72:17]Another second he looks at Kasim and he cries.
[72:21]The mother of Kasim, she was waiting outside but she was embarrassed
[72:25]to come and cry in front of Im Hussein.
[72:30]Im Hussein felt that his mother was waiting.
[72:33]So he removed himself.
[72:37]He left the tent.
[72:38]Then Ramla, the mother of Kasim, she came and she sat at
[72:45]the body of her beloved son Kasim.
[72:47]She begins to tell him, "Oh my dear son Kasim, I had
[72:52]so many dreams for you.
[72:56]I had so many ambitions for you.
[72:58]You have left me.
[72:58]But I'm proud of this moment for you, oh Kasim.
[73:02]Ohim, I want you to stand in front of your grandmother Fatima
[73:07]and tell her I left my mother at Kbala.
[73:22]the drone.
[75:38]Hassan Hassan.
[75:46]Salass.
[75:56]Everyone Hassan Salass Salmonal.
[76:45]Hassan Hassan Salass Hussein.
[77:08]for Hussein.
[77:43]Hassan Hassan.
[77:50]Salass.
[78:00]for Hassan Hassan Salass.
[78:53]Can I do [Music] for Salam.
[79:45]All everyone.
[80:12]Hussein Basher Hussein.
[80:45]Hassan Hassan.
[80:52]Salass.
[81:01]Saline.
[81:10][Music] What else?
[81:54]Hassan Salass.
[82:28]Fore!
[82:29]Foreign!
[82:30]Foreign!
[82:42]Shar.
[82:56]Can you know?
[83:22]Daddy, do you know [Applause] All mus.
[83:44]Husse [Applause] [Applause] everyone.
[84:08]Yah.
[84:09]Mh.
[84:10]Yah.
[84:12]Mh.
[84:13]Yah.
[84:14]Mh.
[84:13]Husse Allah.
[84:29]Born [Laughter] [Music] a to Father, [Applause] shore.
[85:26]foreign [Applause] mus [Applause] everyone.
[85:54]Hussein Hussein Husse are on [Music] [Music] to be father.
[86:37][Music] [Music] [Music] Fore!
[86:58]Foreign!
[86:59]Foreign!
[87:05][Music] [Music] Hussein [Music] Hussein.
[87:26][Music] I need everyone's voices.
[87:41]Hussein [Music] mus.
[87:50][Music] I need everyone's voice.
[87:58][Music] Hussein musch.
[88:07][Music] [Music] Allah.
[88:23]Ya Allah.
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