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Ashuraa 2015 - Night 8 Full Program
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15/10/22
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Lectures
Recorded October 21st, 2015 at the Fordson High School Auditorium in Dearborn, MI
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Transcript
[0:01]yeah not really brothers and sisters before we begin the program i
[5:15]would just like to remind you all that inshallah at the end
[5:18]of the english program we will be exiting from these two side
[5:21]doors you see over here at the left side of the hall
[5:24]instead of the ones in the back inshallah which will minimize traffic
[5:27]for the brothers and sisters coming in for the arabic part brothers
[5:32]and sisters it is great to see you all here with us
[5:34]tonight thank you very much for that beautiful recitation of the holy
[5:38]quran we are coming near the final nights of the ashura program
[5:43]and we're blessed to have with us who has been doing a
[5:47]fantastic job in delivering the message of imam hussain to us in
[5:51]english and we've been enjoying the program in arabic as well brothers
[5:55]and sisters as i said the nyc is able to continue providing
[6:00]these types of programmings so at this point i would like to
[6:03]ask for the nightly sponsorship which is which is a $500 sponsorship
[6:07]and the reason i'm asking is because it is the support of
[6:09]the brothers and sisters of the community who come together who are
[6:12]able to allow the nyc to continue in these programs so brothers
[6:15]and sisters at this point let's find the one sponsor for tonight
[6:18]inshallah the $500 sponsor from the brothers or the sisters we've doing
[6:23]a great job the community has been coming together these nights for
[6:26]the sponsorship so let's keep that going inshallah so we can keep
[6:29]programs like this going with the energy inshallah so let's find the
[6:33]one sponsor for tonight inshallah brothers and sisters $500 sponsor it's necessary
[6:38]for the program to be able to continue because the group is
[6:41]being sponsored we have a sponsor in the bag give them allah
[6:45]muhammad brothers and sisters as i said we have joining us sayyid
[6:54]ahmad al qazwini who is renowned for speaking all over the world
[6:58]in arabic and english and he has translated books into english it
[7:02]is his mission to serve ahlul bayt in the united states and
[7:06]he comes from honorable family who and a very scholarly and knowledgeable
[7:11]family who has all taken part in the mission of serving and
[7:15]allah we are blessed to have him with us for these past
[7:18]nights for tonight and for the following nights inshallah so brothers and
[7:21]sisters at this point please welcome him with allah muhammad yes it's
[8:17]good thank you enlighten your hearts and illuminate your majalis with a
[11:21]loud salawats allah muhammad respected brothers and sisters when it comes to
[11:36]the topic of our children the holy quran the book of god
[11:41]the book of allah clearly illustrates two points the first point is
[11:48]that our children are the greatest or one of the greatest blessings
[11:52]that allah subhanahu wa ta'ala gives us and they are a source
[11:56]of our pride the holy quran says allah says that wealth and
[12:05]children are the adornments they beautify this world this life for us
[12:10]and that's why we love our children so much and thus it
[12:13]stated that during the jahiliyah the arabs used to take so much
[12:18]pride in their children a father would walk and five sons on
[12:22]his right five sons on his left and they used to boast
[12:26]about their children the more children i have the more exalted i
[12:30]am and that's why when they used to when they used to
[12:35]fight rasulullah some of the enemies of our prophets what would they
[12:39]tell him they used to tell him we are better than you
[12:41]and what was their reasoning they used to tell him we're better
[12:43]than you because we have more wealth and more children than you
[12:51]we have more children than you and that's why we're better so
[12:55]they used to show off their children they used to boast about
[12:58]their children some people they show off their wealth others they show
[13:03]off their children and when it comes to islam you find rasulullah
[13:08]he's narrated in one hadith he says he says get married and
[13:21]have lots of children because on the day of judgment i rasulullah
[13:25]will boast about you muslims because we muslims are like the children
[13:29]of rasulullah we're his followers and the more we are the more
[13:33]proud rasulullah will be on the day of judgment and that's why
[13:36]certain narrations tell us that imam ali ibn abi talib had as
[13:41]many as 28 children imam al ka'am our seventh imam had as
[13:47]many as 37 children so our children are the source of our
[13:53]pride of our pride and they are a blessing from allah subhanahu
[13:58]wa ta'ala but as they say there is no blessing that comes
[14:02]without any strings attached because the holy quran at the same time
[14:06]that it says that one of the greatest blessings is your children
[14:10]the holy quran also says in one verse the second verse the
[14:13]holy quran says the holy quran says that your children are what
[14:22]allah will test you with their children so at the same time
[14:26]that my child is a blessing but if this this child is
[14:28]not taken care of and brought up in the right way that
[14:31]blessing can turn into my worst nightmare that blessing can turn into
[14:36]a curse how many mothers and fathers do i know and you
[14:39]know that they struggle with their children they have so many problems
[14:43]with their children how many fathers and mothers they have sleepless nights
[14:49]because of their children because of the problems of their children and
[14:52]especially in the teenage years because it's difficult brothers and sisters raising
[14:57]a child to be behaving to be good practicing faithful individual is
[15:04]not an easy task it's very very difficult and that's why the
[15:08]quran calls our children fitnah we're gonna be tested with our children
[15:13]allah gives me this child and this child is a responsibility can
[15:17]i handle this responsibility or not but what we notice is many
[15:21]people many parents many fathers and mothers they take good care of
[15:26]their children's physical needs they give them the best health the best
[15:31]education the best food and shelter but when it comes to the
[15:35]spiritual needs of their children they're indifferent they don't really care some
[15:40]people worry some parents worry more about their child's cavity than their
[15:45]children's iman faith salah hijab sowm so the question is here as
[15:53]a father or a mother many of you here are parents or
[15:56]inshallah one day you'll get married and you will have the honor
[15:59]of being parents the question is here why is it necessary that
[16:03]i bring my child up with faith why is it important why
[16:08]as a father or mother should i wear worry that my child
[16:12]grows up to be a practicing muslim to be a devout god
[16:17]fearing muslim why is that important why the why should that be
[16:21]in my agenda when i want to bring up my child you
[16:25]see besides the obvious fact that i mentioned that our children have
[16:29]both physical and spiritual needs and as a loving and caring father
[16:32]and mother i should cater to both not just the physical the
[16:36]spiritual needs and faith is one of the needs of the child
[16:39]despite this fact if i raise my child in an islamic way
[16:44]in a way in which i cater for his spiritual needs as
[16:48]well this will work in my interest as well the father and
[16:51]mother i will benefit from this as well how so two ways
[16:57]if i raise my child in an islamic way me the father
[17:01]and the mother i will benefit in two ways how number one
[17:05]you find many parents when their children are growing up and especially
[17:08]when they reach the age of what the teenage years they have
[17:12]many concerns many things that they worry about and there are two
[17:17]main things that they worry about the first thing is that they
[17:20]fear rebellion from their children i the father and the mother raised
[17:24]this child i spent money on this child i love this child
[17:28]i sacrifice for this child once he becomes a teenager he rebels
[17:32]he no longer listens to me he begins to disrespect me one
[17:37]of the greatest fears of parents is what is having an ungrateful
[17:40]father a ungrateful son or daughter if i raise if i raise
[17:46]my child in the islamic way i will never have to fear
[17:49]that do you know why because i tell you there is no
[17:53]religion there is no religion in the world today that stresses on
[17:57]the importance of the respect of parents like islam search amongst all
[18:01]the religions you will never find the religion that stresses the importance
[18:06]of respecting parents like islam to the extent that i mentioned the
[18:11]verse few days ago the holy quran says what often do not
[18:16]even tell them off off is the smallest and least expression of
[18:20]dissatisfaction it's the smallest thing it's the smallest way in which you
[18:24]what you express your dissatisfaction the holy quran says if your mother
[18:28]your father tell you to do something you say you don't want
[18:32]to do it the quran says this is a sin don't say
[18:35]that in another verse allah subhanahu wa ta'ala says he says allah
[18:45]has mandated that you human beings worship god that's number one what's
[18:49]number two after worshiping god number two right after worshiping god is
[18:54]respecting your parents this is the second most important thing so that's
[18:59]why if i raise my child in a way in which he
[19:01]reads the quran and he listens to the quran listens to the
[19:04]words of god this will work for my benefit because allah is
[19:09]telling the children respect your parents i will never fear rebellion so
[19:14]that's number one that's the first fear the second fear that many
[19:17]parents have is what they fear that when their children enter the
[19:20]teenage years they're gonna enter into crimes drugs and many other immoral
[19:26]acts and likewise if i raise my child in an islamic way
[19:30]i never have to fear those things why because if i plant
[19:34]in my child the fear of god the fear of allah subhanahu
[19:37]wa ta'ala i will be sure that my child will never ever
[19:41]go towards immorality i know my child will never go towards crime
[19:46]towards drugs why not because i have to tell him because once
[19:50]i plant within my child the fear of god that fear will
[19:54]be the deterrent because he fears allah he will never go to
[19:58]drugs because that child fears allah subhanahu wa ta'ala he'll never go
[20:02]into crimes so do you see how beautiful just plant the the
[20:07]the fear of god in your children the love of god in
[20:10]your children build a connection between your child and god and you
[20:14]never have to worry again allah will take care of everything god
[20:17]will what will guide them to respecting me and god will guide
[20:21]them to stay away from all of that immorality so it works
[20:24]in my best interest if i raise my child in an islamic
[20:27]way so this is number one this is the first way that
[20:30]i as a father or mother benefit from my child's faith the
[20:35]second way that i as a father or mother benefit from my
[20:37]child's faith is that our children are one of the best investments
[20:42]that we can have you see we all look for investments we
[20:46]want to invest in this life so that we can benefit in
[20:50]the long run many of us invest in the stock market others
[20:53]we invest in real estate others in merchandise and so many other
[20:56]things but what you find is when i invest in my child
[21:00]and when i bring up my child in a way in which
[21:03]he is always reciting quran in a way in which he fears
[21:07]allah subhanahu wa ta'ala not only will i benefit from my child
[21:11]in this life but i'll also benefit after i die you see
[21:16]all these investments as soon as i die they're no use that's
[21:21]it if you have if you own thousands of acres and you're
[21:24]making grant from all of those or you have so much stocks
[21:29]and you're making money out of those as soon as you die
[21:31]you're never gonna benefit anymore from those but my child if i
[21:35]raise a god fearing good practicing faithful religious child i will benefit
[21:42]from that child even after my death first of all how do
[21:45]i benefit from my child in this world besides the first point
[21:48]that we mentioned any good deed that my child does my dear
[21:52]brothers and sisters allah will also reward me because the hadith says
[22:01]you've all heard this hadith the hadith says if you guide someone
[22:04]to doing something good if i tell my my brother do something
[22:06]good and he goes and he does something good because i guided
[22:09]him and taught him that allah says that i will reward you
[22:13]as well because you are the one that taught that person and
[22:15]guided that person to that good correct imagine if that child all
[22:20]that he contains which is good was from the mother and father
[22:23]every good deed that child will do allah will reward me because
[22:27]i'm responsible for it and even after i die i'm in my
[22:31]grave i'm dead halas i can no longer do any good deeds
[22:34]i see i'm getting reward after reward after reward i asked the
[22:38]angels why they tell me because your son and your daughter are
[22:41]doing good deeds and you're benefiting from them and not only will
[22:45]they do good deeds but they'll do good deeds for me you
[22:48]see the quran teaches us if i want to be a grateful
[22:51]son and daughter what do i have to do i have to
[22:54]always do dua prayer for my father and mother always pray for
[22:57]your parents whether they are alive or dead and especially if they're
[23:00]dead every single day brothers and sisters the quran says for your
[23:04]parents the holy quran says everyday brothers and sisters do a dua
[23:16]for your parents tell god you allah i ask you to bless
[23:20]my parents i ask you to show my parents mercy in the
[23:23]same way they were merciful with me when i was a child
[23:26]so i'm in my grave i'm dead but my child is what
[23:29]my son and my daughter are doing good deeds for me they
[23:31]read quran for me they read dua for me they donate for
[23:35]an islamic or a good cause for me and i am the
[23:37]one that's receiving all what all the ajjab do you see it
[23:40]what a beautiful investment plants in your children the love of god
[23:44]allah will do all the rest for you so these are two
[23:47]ways we benefit from our children but you find allah subhanahu wa
[23:53]ta'ala he tells us that a believer he does a dua every
[23:58]believer should do a dua regarding their children the holy quran says
[24:01]in the verse i began my lecture with allah says every believer
[24:15]makes this dua what is this dua he asked allah you allah
[24:18]i want you to give me for my children my offsprings the
[24:22]comforts of my heart and the joy of my eyes every day
[24:26]i should ask allah to give me children that will give me
[24:28]comfort do you know how many parents suffer from their from their
[24:31]children because of their children they suffer i have to ask allah
[24:35]to give me children that will give me comfort not that lead
[24:39]me to suffering because of their problems every day i get a
[24:42]phone call from school look what your son look what your daughter
[24:44]did sometimes i get a phone call from the police station look
[24:47]what we caught your son or daughter doing is this a life
[24:49]that we look forward to i want comfort for my children the
[24:53]joy of my eyes for my children i do this dua every
[24:56]day and this comfort and this joy my friends does not come
[25:00]for free it's not just gonna happen automatically one day it's not
[25:06]gonna be planted in my children when they are in school if
[25:10]i want comfort for my children don't think that the public schools
[25:14]will teach my children to be in that way don't think that
[25:17]the tv will teach my child to be in a way in
[25:20]which i will be comfortable the tv nor the public schools will
[25:25]teach our children respect your parents never i went to public schools
[25:28]i watched the tv never ever in my life i hear you
[25:31]a teacher respect your parents even if there is it's very rare
[25:35]this only comes from what from my hard work brothers and sisters
[25:38]my efforts the more time i spend on my children the more
[25:43]effort i put into them the greater the result just like business
[25:46]if you have a business the more time you spend on your
[25:49]business the greater the profit the same exact thing applies with our
[25:53]children that's why we have to spend time with our children my
[25:55]friends we should not neglect them do you know now in america
[26:00]in america in the us has the highest rate of prisoners in
[26:06]the world and just yesterday or two days ago i was reading
[26:09]something in the news that so many senators and congressmen they want
[26:13]to find a you know a solution to to this huge population
[26:17]of inmates in america what do we do with all these inmates
[26:19]not only is it you know bad for us but it's also
[26:23]costing us because all of you know the all these inmates are
[26:26]being spent on from our taxes so what do we do do
[26:29]you know what's the leading cause to crime in america why do
[26:33]people commit crimes the leading cause to crime and substance abuse drugs
[26:39]is what studies say the leading cause to crime and substance abuse
[26:45]is the absence of the father in the family when there is
[26:48]no guiding father in the family the human being collapses they did
[26:53]a study on those inmates do you know what most of them
[26:56]had in common their father was absent when they were young either
[27:00]because he was dead or because he was in the prisons or
[27:02]because he just abandoned the family and want and found another life
[27:06]to an extent that i read in one statistic that some of
[27:09]the in some of the states in the us 90% of up
[27:16]to 90% of the of the juvenile detention center which are all
[27:21]what all youth all young guys that have what committed crimes up
[27:24]to 90% of the inmates of those juvenile detention centers had one
[27:28]thing in common what was it they were raised without a father
[27:32]present the father wasn't there 90% of them had no father the
[27:40]father was dead or was absent from their lives for whatever reason
[27:43]and another statistic i read that said that the rates of teenage
[27:48]pregnancy you know now now if you hear a girl that's 12
[27:52]years old that gets pregnant it's normal it happens so often a
[27:56]12 13 14 year old girl that gets pregnant it's it's normal
[27:59]in these days because the parents are absent from the lives of
[28:02]these children do you know that i read a statistic that said
[28:05]the rates of teenage girls getting pregnant is up to eight times
[28:11]higher amongst those girls whose fathers were were absent in their early
[28:15]years do some research just google it you'll find these stats up
[28:19]to eight times higher do you see how vital how important the
[28:23]role of the father is and not just the father the mother
[28:26]but especially the father and that's why this all shows us that
[28:29]we have to spend time with our children we have to get
[28:32]involved do you think these inmates they had the honor and privilege
[28:36]of a father over them telling them what to do guiding them
[28:39]they didn't since their parents didn't raise them the streets raised them
[28:43]the public schools tv raised them and that's what you get all
[28:46]these inmates 90% had no fathers we have to brothers and sisters
[28:51]we have to pay attention to all of this and you'll find
[28:55]statistics say that an average do you know an average mother in
[28:59]the us how many hours does she spend with her child an
[29:05]average month an average mother not the small children but school children
[29:09]mostly and especially teenagers an average mother in the us spends thirteen
[29:14]hours a week only only thirteen hours a week as for the
[29:19]father it's even worth worse the average father spends only seven hours
[29:25]with his child a week so one hour a day twenty three
[29:28]hours he's with his friends and school and tv and sleeping and
[29:32]eating and only one hour with the father but how many hours
[29:36]do we spend on our work statistics state forty five hours that
[29:41]the american spends on work forty five hours a week on work
[29:44]but seven hours with his child and then when we see our
[29:47]children going into crimes and substance we say why do you know
[29:52]why because while i was building my financial empire my child was
[29:59]let loose in the streets i know many parents brothers and sisters
[30:04]masha allah wealthy allah has given them so much wealth but what
[30:09]you find is they have so many problems with their children they
[30:13]have the worst children their sons they grow up he's in the
[30:16]twenties every day there's a problem either it's a financial problem or
[30:20]it's a moral problem or he breaks a law every single day
[30:23]it's a headache but mashaallah is a millionaire is he benefiting from
[30:27]his wealth do you know why that happened because while he was
[30:29]busy building and and and accumulating all that wealth his child was
[30:34]being raised by others by the streets by the tv and then
[30:39]we ask why and then once we cut run into problems we
[30:42]come to the scholars why maulana shaykh sayyid look at my son
[30:45]where were you for fifteen twenty years you were asleep in business
[30:50]and now you come to allah subhanahu wa ta'ala now that you
[30:52]need him so that's why brothers and sisters it's essential and vital
[30:58]that we spend time with our children one hour a day brothers
[31:02]and sisters is too little i have to spend much more time
[31:05]with my child much more time with my son and my daughter
[31:08]and that's why tonight for the remaining of the minutes i will
[31:11]mention three important steps three practical important steps that we have that
[31:17]we can apply in our lives with our relationships with our children
[31:21]in order to secure that we have children that give us what
[31:24]the comfort of our heart and the joy of our eyes but
[31:28]before i do that please aloud muhammad the first thing that we
[31:37]have to do in order to raise children once again i mentioned
[31:40]this many of you are parents and others they're not parents but
[31:45]one day you will be parents so please these advices that i'm
[31:49]giving you that are all taken from the quran all taken from
[31:51]the hadith keep them remember them that once you have a child
[31:57]and apply them so three things that we can do the first
[32:01]thing that we can do in order to ensure that we have
[32:03]good believing practicing children that give us comfort don't give us a
[32:07]headache is what's number one develop a good relationship with your children
[32:13]you see many children go grow up in this country and his
[32:17]father or mother are strangers to them especially the father his father
[32:21]is a stranger why because he only sees him one hour a
[32:24]day he doesn't know too much about his father and the father
[32:27]doesn't know too much about his son yes they live under one
[32:31]roof but that's it that's the only commonality between them that's the
[32:35]only only common factor they live under one roof but the father
[32:40]is busy busy with his life the son is busy with his
[32:43]life and once you have this once there is no time spent
[32:48]between the father and the son or the father and the daughter
[32:52]or the mother and the daughter what happens is they begin to
[32:54]what drift away from each other until there is a barrier between
[32:58]them there's a barrier between them because the son feels like my
[33:02]father is a stranger and that's why you find many parents many
[33:06]parents one thing that they complain about with their children is what
[33:09]my son or daughter doesn't listen to me i can't impact him
[33:13]his friends they impact him they have an impact on him they
[33:16]influence him but me i have no influence on my children they
[33:19]ask why do you know why because we have no relationship with
[33:22]our children we know nothing about them nothing my his friends they
[33:27]know a lot about him that's why he likes his friends that's
[33:31]why she likes her friends because they spend so much time with
[33:33]them they have so many common features between each other but the
[33:36]father is busy busy with his life the son says he knows
[33:39]nothing about me all all he cares about is his business and
[33:42]unfortunately many parents the only the only you know involvement that they
[33:46]have with their children's life is what number one if the child
[33:49]does something bad they rebuke them and they give them orders do
[33:53]this and do that and obviously this creates what tension between the
[33:57]child and the father the child grows up not loving his father
[34:00]he doesn't know him the father doesn't really show too much love
[34:03]he's too busy with his life with his work and with his
[34:06]friends and i'm too busy with my friends and this is where
[34:10]you see the tension rises that's why i have to take time
[34:13]to spend it with my child every day when we have lunch
[34:16]or dinner together make sure that your child is sitting there speak
[34:20]to him speak to her ask them what did you do today
[34:22]honey what are you gonna do tomorrow ask them about their school
[34:25]ask them about their friends ask them what they like get to
[34:28]know your children to many of us our children are strangers we
[34:32]know nothing about them and likewise our parents are strangers to many
[34:37]of us so we have to create that bond that relationship take
[34:40]them out go to a restaurant go to starbucks and enjoy and
[34:46]and and get to know your child and one of the greatest
[34:49]obstacles i tell you my friends one of the greatest obstacles to
[34:53]this family relationship and not just family relationships but all social relationships
[34:58]today is what what's one of the greatest obstacle to obstacles to
[35:01]relationships technology this technology is smart my friends but unfortunately it's creating
[35:12]dumb people people that all they know is what 24 a day
[35:17]looking at their iphones and their smartphones our children are growing up
[35:23]and they don't even know how to talk do you know why
[35:25]they don't know how to speak because all they do from morning
[35:27]till night to night till morning they text and they tweet either
[35:31]on facebook or instagram or twitter or i don't know what these
[35:35]new ones that i don't even know about they don't even talk
[35:39]they don't speak all they do is what texting and tweeting as
[35:45]soon as the child comes from home what does he do he
[35:49]quickly rushes into his room he jumps and dives into his device
[35:53]his iphone his ipad his whatever he puts on the headphones and
[35:57]for four hours he zooms out until the battery dies he wakes
[36:00]up listening to music surfing watching youtube whatever you see what kind
[36:05]of obstacles creating he has absolutely no no you know contact with
[36:11]with with his mother with his father with his brothers with his
[36:13]sisters this this device and this is not a problem just for
[36:16]the young ones i mentioned this a few days ago even us
[36:18]adults many times you see this is so annoying you see some
[36:22]people i mentioned this when they can't find their phones for two
[36:25]minutes they go crazy we go when we go to the bathrooms
[36:28]we have to take our iphones with us when we sleep so
[36:31]many people you see when he's falling asleep he's like this he
[36:33]has his iphone and then it falls on his face and it
[36:36]injures his face how many times you know that's happened to you
[36:40]and then once we sleep we put it right under our pillow
[36:43]we cannot leave these devices for a single second i remember a
[36:47]couple of months ago saw a very funny but sad picture it
[36:51]was a picture of a family that was that had gone to
[36:55]visit the grandma it was a father the mother and five children
[36:59]three of them they're a little old and two of them they're
[37:01]younger and the picture you see the they're supposedly visiting the grandma
[37:07]in her house so the father he's on his iphone the mother
[37:10]she's on her iphone the three older children they're on their iphone
[37:13]and the two younger ones they're playing on their ipad and the
[37:15]grandma's just looking like this because she's old she doesn't have a
[37:19]ipad i doesn't know what these are and there is and it
[37:22]was so funny the comment says know if they would have let
[37:24]her sleep would have been better they're supposedly visiting her and they're
[37:28]just all on what under under smart devices smartphones so this has
[37:33]become an obstacle we have to put a limit to this brothers
[37:35]and sisters speak speak to one another doesn't kill to speak to
[37:39]one another instead of sending low and most of times which is
[37:43]not true you know sometimes you see some people r o f
[37:46]l have you ever seen someone rolling on the floor laughing come
[37:49]on so speak well this is number one develop that relationship with
[37:55]your children number two a second important thing when it comes to
[38:02]raising our children is that we have to teach our children about
[38:06]their faith the hadith of our holy prophet says teach your children
[38:24]three things listen carefully friends this is the hadith of rasulullah our
[38:28]prophet he says teach your children three things the first thing he
[38:33]says teach them to love their prophet our holy prophet muhammad teach
[38:42]your children to love him teach them about their prophet educate them
[38:46]about their prophet number two he says and the love of his
[38:52]family the 12 imams of al al bayt teach them about educate
[38:56]them educate them about their aqidah about their belief system and number
[38:59]three teach them to read quran excuse me unfortunately our young brothers
[39:08]and sisters our children are growing up they don't know how to
[39:11]read quran they don't understand the quran they absolutely do not connect
[39:15]with the quran this is our responsibility and one of the biggest
[39:18]mistakes that we do as parents is what we teach them sometimes
[39:23]but we wait too much we wait too much we postpone too
[39:27]much i say you know what when my son turns 15 years
[39:30]old i'll sit and i'll teach him about the prophet i'll sit
[39:33]and i'll teach him about salah when my daughter is nine or
[39:36]sometimes 15 or 18 i'll teach them about their faith you see
[39:39]in this country how do we treat kids the child is a
[39:44]kid until he's 18 and then the next day all of a
[39:46]sudden there's a sudden transformation he's an adult until he's 17 years
[39:52]old and three hundred and sixty four days he's a little baby
[39:55]there's no responsibility he doesn't have to do it but once he
[39:58]turns 18 all of a sudden he's an adult so if i
[40:01]wanna wait until my son is 15 and i teach him salah
[40:05]brothers and sisters it's difficult number one the sudden swift transformation is
[40:10]difficult for fifteen years he never prayed all of a sudden you
[40:13]want him to pray five times a day start earlier gradually for
[40:17]eight years and nine or eleven months she never wore hijab all
[40:20]of a sudden i want her to wear hijab start earlier make
[40:22]it gradual process it's common sense this is number one that's why
[40:25]i should start early number two you find when our children are
[40:29]young they accept what we tell them children when they're three four
[40:34]or five years old they respect their parents anything the father mother
[40:37]tells them they they accept it because they love their parents and
[40:41]that they know nothing better they don't have anyone else to turn
[40:43]to but the more they grow the farther they get from their
[40:47]parents why because they start developing their own beliefs their own ideology
[40:51]so when i tell he's 15 17 years old i tell him
[40:54]pray he might not necessarily be convinced because he's he has friends
[40:57]that tell him to do otherwise and that's why we have to
[41:00]take advantage of teaching them when they're young my friends not when
[41:04]they're old when they're old it's too late he's not gonna accept
[41:06]he just wants to rebel the father and the mother i'm not
[41:09]cool anymore when i'm 16 and 17 but when i'm young i
[41:14]accept what my parents tell me so we have to start young
[41:17]we have to start early how early i you ask when do
[41:21]i start and this may come as a surprise to you i
[41:23]tell you start even before the child is born i tell you
[41:27]start even before you get married i spoke about marriage one night
[41:32]and i said the factors that we should base our marriages on
[41:36]if i want to raise a good child i don't begin when
[41:39]he's 18 years old i begin even before marriage when i want
[41:42]to get married i choose the spouse that will be the the
[41:46]good mother for my child i choose the spouse that will be
[41:49]the good father for my child don't just face marriages on love
[41:52]brothers and sisters love fades away make sure that that person is
[41:56]what is a good role model for my child that mother mother
[41:59]and father so i start even before marriage and then once i
[42:03]married and once the child is conceived i tell the pregnant mother
[42:07]mothers you have a responsibility don't wait while you are pregnant there's
[42:12]many things you can do number one never eat haram food because
[42:16]haram food is what it's negative energy and that negative energy goes
[42:20]inside the baby in your stomach and negative energy translate to what
[42:24]translates to negative action so never eat haram food when you're pregnant
[42:28]never eat haram food at all times but especially when i as
[42:32]a mother am pregnant and number two the second important thing is
[42:36]that always make sure that you always have the quran playing always
[42:42]have quran cassette player see the audio of the quran because science
[42:47]has proven that the child can hear after certain weeks certain amount
[42:51]of weeks the child can hear the surroundings and i was reading
[42:54]a a study that was conducted by the university of finland it
[42:58]said it it's so amazing and so interesting it said that researchers
[43:03]found that babies who their mothers when they were pregnant that their
[43:09]mothers used to watch soap operas when they were pregnant when they
[43:14]were born these children would be addicted to the melodies of those
[43:18]soap operas can you believe that because they heard it so much
[43:22]constantly they would be addicted to those melodies imagine if that mother
[43:25]instead of the soap opera she would have listened to quran the
[43:28]child would have been addicted to quran and that's why there's a
[43:31]young boy many of you have heard of him he's a sayyid
[43:33]and his name is tabatabai he's from the tabatabai family he was
[43:36]five years old he memorized the entire quran i've seen his video
[43:40]video in iran so beautifully not only has he memorized the quran
[43:44]now he's much older this is many years ago not only did
[43:47]he memorize the quran at the age of five but he could
[43:50]fully understand the quran they asked his mother one day how did
[43:56]you raise such a beautiful child that he is able to memorize
[43:58]the entire quran it's huge at the age of five she said
[44:03]i started the journey very early ever since the first day i
[44:06]was pregnant non stop quran non stop quran is playing all the
[44:10]time when i was pregnant when he the child was born i
[44:13]used to take a cassette player and place it by his head
[44:15]when he's sleeping and put it on low volume it's quran quran
[44:19]quran obviously 24 when he's surrounded by quran he's gonna memorize the
[44:23]quran it's common sense so start early my friends and there's a
[44:27]story of one of our ulema by the name of al muqaddas
[44:29]al erdabili this is one of our greatest scholars they asked his
[44:33]mother what did you do what are what what are some of
[44:35]the things you did and one thing that she mentioned is every
[44:38]time i used to breastfeed my child i used to do wabu
[44:41]before that wabu that we do for salah every time i used
[44:45]to breastfeed my child i used to do wabu so these brothers
[44:49]and sisters don't say oh he's a child he doesn't understand no
[44:52]science is telling us the sounds they affect so i start very
[44:57]early and once the child is born if the child is two
[45:01]or three years old i have to start telling them about ahlul
[45:04]bayt about rasulullah you see our children when they're two three four
[45:08]five years old who's their role models superheroes spider man batman superman
[45:14]and these these new superheroes that exist today teach your children that
[45:18]the true superheroes are whom are imam hussain the superhero that my
[45:24]little child should always look up to and love is not spider
[45:28]man and batman that's fine but this is all fictional i tell
[45:32]him what the true supermodel the true superhero that you have to
[45:36]look up to is rasulullah is imam ali alaihi salaam is the
[45:40]twelfth imam imam al mehdi these are our role models and once
[45:46]they grow older they still have role models but they change who's
[45:50]the role models of teenagers it's the actors the athletes and the
[45:54]singers who have nothing to give to our youth nothing nothing did
[45:59]they did they teach them about kindness generosity respect of parents altruism
[46:02]nothing they have nothing to teach our children teach your children that
[46:06]your true role models the holy prophet says your children raise them
[46:13]with the love of muhammad so start the journey at a very
[46:23]early age because if i don't and i let my child grow
[46:28]it's gonna be difficult to change him after this is number two
[46:32]we said number one develop a relationship number two teach them about
[46:36]ahlul bayt from a early age and number three my friends we
[46:40]have to place limits on our children we have to constantly monitor
[46:44]our children because in this world world there are so many dangers
[46:49]that surround our children and we have to protect them and there
[46:53]are three main things that influence factors that influence our children number
[46:58]one school they spend 7 to 9 hours a day in schools
[47:03]and i tell you my friends i went to public schools here
[47:07]if you have the option of not enrolling your children in public
[47:11]schools instead putting them in private schools do so public schools do
[47:16]not give the best discipline to your children and here in this
[47:21]community you have more than one islamic school i know it may
[47:25]be costly but it's worth the investment so that's number one if
[47:29]i can enroll them in islamic school do so never hesitate it
[47:32]is worth every single penny that's number one number two is what
[47:37]the second influential factor for our children is friends make sure you
[47:42]know who the friends of your children are because even if you
[47:45]give your children the best discipline and you bring them up in
[47:49]the best way it all it requires this one evil friend that
[47:53]drags him back to what to the evil satanic ways if you
[47:59]bring up your child in the best way but he has a
[48:02]bad friend that bad friend is bad influence how many stories do
[48:05]i know a child a son a daughter this young guy or
[48:08]this young girl they were the best most bright you know students
[48:11]and young people but because of the influence of one person peer
[48:15]pressure it led him to so many evil results so we have
[48:19]to make sure we know who the friends of our children are
[48:22]don't just tell them go and befriend and that's it no make
[48:24]sure who they are scrutinize monitor this is number two and number
[48:29]three is media we have to put a limit on the media
[48:33]that our children are exposed to and by media i mean tv
[48:37]music music should be should not not even be most of forms
[48:41]of of the inappropriate music should not even be in our homes
[48:45]tv music social media and surfing the internet do you know statistics
[48:50]states that an average teenager in the us how many hours does
[48:54]he and she spend on media all these four types of media
[48:59]up to seven hours a day up to seven hours a day
[49:03]do we know what our children are watching and seeing many parents
[49:06]are clueless wallahi i know because i know the parents is lost
[49:10]and then i i go on those you know social media sites
[49:13]i see what those children are doing do we know what they're
[49:15]exposed to do you think they're gonna teach social media is gonna
[49:19]teach my child salah it's gonna teach solem do you think the
[49:22]tv is gonna teach my child to respect me i don't think
[49:27]so and that's why we have to make sure that we know
[49:31]what they're exposed to monitor put some limits scrutinized there's nothing wrong
[49:36]with that there's so many dangers in this world we have to
[49:39]always make sure they're what they're on the right path there's so
[49:42]much harm brothers and sisters out there there's so much inappropriate content
[49:46]on the internet make sure your children are not getting access to
[49:50]that and many parents they would be surprised what their children are
[49:54]doing on social media they have no clue they have absolutely no
[50:00]clue what they're doing on social media i see some children some
[50:04]not children teenagers for example once i once on an account of
[50:10]a girl and it was she was a muhajabad muslim muhajabad and
[50:16]i see i go on her wall and all she does is
[50:19]flirt with guys and she's wearing the hijab the father has absolutely
[50:22]no clue that's all she does the whole day and not only
[50:26]that but you find she posts so many inappropriate pictures of her
[50:29]i tell this to the sisters if i am wearing the hijab
[50:32]this is a responsibility do not post inappropriate pictures wearing the hijab
[50:36]keep it private send it to your friends or girls don't put
[50:39]it in a public post i see so many times allah inappropriate
[50:43]pictures that these are are putting it's so disturbing and the father
[50:47]the mother they're clueless and then i go on the same girl
[50:50]i go on her about page who's her role model justin bieber
[50:54]and she's a muhajibat does the father know this does the mother
[50:57]know know this i'm not saying that i'm not saying that take
[51:00]away take all this away from him i'm just telling you that
[51:03]play some limits i remember i read in the news a couple
[51:07]of years ago there was a mother who she gave her 13
[51:12]year old son an iphone but she only gave him the iphone
[51:16]after putting 18 conditions google it mother gives her son iphone with
[51:20]18 condition it was all over the news she put 18 conditions
[51:24]to the iphone number one it's mine you don't own it you're
[51:27]just borrowing it number two 07:30pm it goes off until the next
[51:31]day i don't know what time number three you can go on
[51:33]such and such inappropriate websites number four up to 18 laws that
[51:37]he had to abide by this is excellent there's so many dangers
[51:40]out there and our children don't know any better so i have
[51:44]to scrutinize and a lot of this i tell you my friends
[51:47]even if it's not harmful it's a waste of time our children
[51:49]waste so much time on the social media you see some people
[51:53]i see some people that you know post pictures and and and
[51:57]post information and stuff on their for example on their facebook account
[52:01]they put so much irrelevant stuff everyday 10 posts now i'm eating
[52:06]pizza an hour after now i'm at walmart now i'm taking a
[52:09]shower now i mean with all due respect most people aren't don't
[52:13]even care what you're doing so don't waste your time what am
[52:16]i gonna benefit just so i get 10 likes just so i
[52:18]get a 100 likes that's how low i i go that i'm
[52:21]i'm willing to spend hours just so i get a few likes
[52:24]on instagram and on facebook and on twitter so it's a waste
[52:28]of time and most of it or a lot of it is
[52:31]harmful so we have to place brothers and sisters we have to
[52:35]place the limits if i give my child internet i give him
[52:39]iphone ipad credit card car and i leave him and i'm at
[52:43]work wallahi i'm not spoiling my child i'm destroying my child and
[52:48]let me tell you a story and we'll end with this i
[52:53]there was a scholar that i heard the this this story from
[52:57]a scholar here in the us he says that one day a
[53:02]father he comes to me to the office and he's crying i
[53:06]told him why are crying he says you don't know what happened
[53:08]with my family he says my son turned 18 and he's a
[53:13]very very good man you know a very religious faithful man he
[53:17]says my son turns 18 so what do i do i buy
[53:22]him a car a credit card the whole nine yards i give
[53:24]him everything now he's what now he's supposedly a responsible adult i
[53:29]give him everything so he said alhamdulillah i didn't have that's what
[53:32]he claims i didn't have problems with my son the next year
[53:35]my daughter turned 18 so now she comes to me and she
[53:38]tells me baba father give me what you gave my brother but
[53:41]he you know he's from middle east we treat girls sometimes different
[53:45]than boys so he tells her my dear daughter he's a boy
[53:48]he can have all of that you're a girl so i can't
[53:50]give you so you know the the youth that are brought up
[53:53]in this country no difference so she says she started complaining so
[53:57]much and what made it worse was my wife my wife took
[54:00]her side she started complaining and she started what she started nagging
[54:04]and whining why why is it that you treat your son better
[54:07]than your daughter give her he says i gave up i gave
[54:10]in i gave her everything he says a couple of months after
[54:15]my daughter was being suspicious she comes back late she's not there
[54:19]for dinner she's this and that so he says i decided to
[54:22]spy on her he says i follow her and i see that
[54:25]she has what an unlawful relationship she's she has a boyfriend he
[54:29]says was about to die how can my i i am such
[54:32]a holy person my father is fulan and fulan in the middle
[54:34]east and my daughter and my daughter goes and does this behind
[54:41]my back with the car that i gave her with the money
[54:43]that i have given her so he says i i did nothing
[54:47]he says i did nothing when i went home she came i
[54:52]told her daughter where were you he says i wanted to lecture
[54:55]her i wanted to yell at her she started yelling at me
[54:58]father how dare you spy on me this and that and and
[55:02]you never asked my brother he says a huge crawl erupted he
[55:05]said i was so angered i took the chair i threw it
[55:08]at my at my wife because he says my wife also took
[55:12]her side again but i missed right away the wife she 911
[55:17]they call cops and now the children i have no right to
[55:21]see them i can't go close to them and i'm living in
[55:25]hell where did it start brothers and sisters where did the problem
[55:30]start it started from day one there's absolutely no monitoring there's absolutely
[55:35]no laws you just give them everything and you think you're spoiling
[55:38]them wallahi you're not spoiling them this is the exact way that
[55:41]we destroy our kids so if i want to raise beautiful faithful
[55:46]pious children like the children of ahlul bayt i follow these steps
[55:52]and i make sure that i teach them about ahlul bayt i
[55:57]plant all of this faith and wisdom while they are young only
[56:01]in that way i can have a child like the son of
[56:04]imam hassan al qasim ibn al hassan al qasim ibn al hassan
[56:08]was only 13 or 14 years old but he was filled with
[56:13]knowledge he was filled with wisdom it was the night of ashura
[56:19]and i mentioned a few nights ago imam hussein he brought all
[56:22]his companions and he told them look the enemies want to kill
[56:26]me imam hussein the grandson of rasulullah tells them the enemies want
[56:31]to kill me they're not after you so you guys can go
[56:34]leave and then remember i said they turned off the candle he
[56:37]turned it back on none of them had moved amongst amongst the
[56:41]companions of imam hussein and his relatives was al qasim ibn al
[56:44]hassan this young boy he hears his uncle saying that tomorrow all
[56:49]of you will die if you stay so if you want leave
[56:52]so after the imam says that al qasim he comes to his
[56:56]uncle and he asked him my dear uncle he says will i
[57:03]also be killed tomorrow what does the imam tell him what should
[57:08]the imam tell him imagine you had a young 13 year old
[57:11]nephew that may god forbid was afflicted with a with a fatal
[57:17]and terminal disease and the doctor said he's gonna die tomorrow and
[57:20]then that child asked you uncle am i gonna die tomorrow can
[57:23]you tell him yes can you break his heart and tell him
[57:25]you're gonna die tomorrow so imam hussain he doesn't wanna tell him
[57:28]yes you're gonna be killed tomorrow as well because they had no
[57:30]mercy they even killed the six month old child of imam hussain
[57:33]so imam hussain knew even al qasim is gonna get killed but
[57:36]he doesn't tell him that he wants to test his faith so
[57:39]what does he ask al qasim he tells him and he calls
[57:44]him my son because al qasim was an orphan he was the
[57:48]orphan of imam hassan and imam hassan before he died he had
[57:51]entrusted imam hussein to take care of him so he tells him
[57:55]how do you perceive death are you afraid of death look at
[58:02]the answer of al qasim wallahi this beautiful answer of qasim spend
[58:06]millions of dollars on your children you can never plant this much
[58:10]wisdom it's only the love of ahlul bayt the love of allah
[58:13]that brings you such beautiful children you know what qasim says he
[58:16]says this is my uncle if i die for you tomorrow it's
[58:23]sweeter than honey the wisdom of al imam hussein is expecting that
[58:29]he might cry he might say why he says if i die
[58:32]for you my uncle tomorrow it's sweeter than honey he's only 13
[58:34]14 years old imam hussein he hugs al qasim they cry the
[58:39]day of ashura comes many of the companions have been all of
[58:44]the companions have been killed many of the relatives of bani hashem
[58:47]the relatives of imam hussein have been killed al ibn akbar is
[58:50]killed only a few remain al qasim sees that it is time
[58:54]that he goes to the battlefield and he makes his uncle proud
[58:57]and he makes his grandmother fatima tuz zahra proud he goes to
[59:01]his uncle imam hussein my dear uncle give me permission to go
[59:04]and fight these enemies the imam he sees as a young boy
[59:08]and he's an orphan how can he let him go he tells
[59:10]him my dear nephew i cannot let you go forgive me you
[59:14]your your my brother your father imam hassan before he died he
[59:18]told me to take care of you how can i send you
[59:20]to the battlefield to die forgive me i cannot do that so
[59:24]al qasim he was rejected by imam imam hussein he goes in
[59:28]a corner he's so depressed he's so disturbed he's so sad he
[59:31]wants to go and make his uncle proud he wants to go
[59:34]and fight so he starts crying all the sudden he remembers that
[59:38]when he was very young there was a will left to him
[59:41]from his father imam hassan it was a letter and on that
[59:45]letter it was written to al qasim from his father my dear
[59:49]son if a day of great calamity comes by if you feel
[59:53]like it's the worst day of your life open this letter so
[59:56]al qasim remembers that letter he goes and finds it he opens
[59:59]it he sees it's a letter from imam hassan to his brother
[60:02]imam hussein he's so happy he takes it to imam hussein imam
[60:06]hussein as soon as he sees the hands writing of his brother
[60:09]imam hassan he begins to cry he remembers him and then he
[60:12]sees in the letter his brother imam hassan telling him my dear
[60:14]brother hussein on the day of ashura i will not be there
[60:18]to protect you on the day of ashura my son al qasim
[60:21]will be there even though he is young please my dear brother
[60:24]hussein accept my son as a sacrifice for you imam hussein sees
[60:29]now he has no choice he has to accept this young boy
[60:33]going to fight so he comes to al qasim he tells him
[60:36]i permit you my son but there's only one problem i'm embarrassed
[60:39]of your mother how can i handle that your mother watches you
[60:44]die in front of her and you're being killed for my sake
[60:47]i'm embarrassed of her al qasim tells his uncle my dear uncle
[60:51]hussein he tells him that it's my mother that is encouraging me
[60:59]don't worry about my mother she's the one that put on my
[61:01]armor she's telling me go and sacrifice your life for your uncle
[61:05]hussein so don't worry about that imam hussain he gives him the
[61:11]green light he goes and he farewells all the woman he fell
[61:15]he farewells his mother and then he farewells about abdullah al hussain
[61:19]his uncle imam hussein he gives him the sword and then he
[61:24]helps him mount the horse because he's only a child he's a
[61:27]young child he cannot mount the horse by himself he helps him
[61:30]get on the horse and he goes towards the battlefield hamid ibn
[61:34]muslim one of the narrators he said all of a sudden we
[61:37]saw a young beautiful boy who was like a shining moon he
[61:40]came to us while he was reading these poems he begins to
[62:14]take the sword and he charges against the enemies with great valor
[62:19]and courage and he says if you do not know me then
[62:23]i tell you i am the son of al hasan i am
[62:27]the grandson of the messenger of god i am the nephew of
[62:31]hussain the one that you have taken captive he goes towards the
[62:38]enemies he puts up such a beautiful courageous fight he kills some
[62:42]of them all the sudden one of the enemies he comes from
[62:46]behind him the sandal of al qasim strips so it straps so
[62:50]he goes he bends down to fix his sandal all the sudden
[62:53]this enemy he comes from behind him and he strikes qasim on
[62:57]his head al qasim falls down now you see all the companions
[63:04]when they used to fall down they used to say farewell hussein
[63:06]but this qasim he was a young boy what did he say
[63:11]he said my uncle rescue me come to my rescue allahu akbar
[63:18]imam hussein here is al qasim calling for help he rushes towards
[63:23]the killer of al qasim imam hussein kills him the narrators say
[63:28]that when the dust settles we saw imam hussein sitting by the
[63:33]body of al qasim he took the hat of al qasim he
[63:36]placed it in his lap and then he told qasim these heartbreaking
[63:41]words he tells him he said it's so difficult for me that
[63:55]i remember you called me but i was not able to help
[63:58]you their enemies will be your grandfather rasulullah on the day of
[64:08]judgment and your father imam hassan after that al qasim's soul departed
[64:14]this world imam hussein took the body of al qasim back to
[64:26]the tent nayrajir say that the feet of al qasim they were
[64:29]being dragged against the sands that means imam hussein was not able
[64:33]to stand up imam hussein did not have enough energy to carry
[64:37]the body of al qasim he took the body of al qasim
[64:42]and he placed it next to the body of all the other
[64:45]martyrs he placed it next to the body of ali ibn al
[64:48]iqbar and then all the woman the aunts and the relatives of
[64:54]al qasim they came they saw this little beautiful boy he's covered
[64:58]with blood and he has been killed and then the mother of
[65:03]al qaasim ramallah she comes she sees this beautiful 13 year old
[65:07]child of hers he is covered with blood she takes from the
[65:12]blood al qaasim and she dyes her hair my grandchildren brothers and
[65:44]sisters please stay seated for another five minutes inshallah we shall read
[65:48]a short brief but first muhammad everyone repeat after me these words
[66:09]my son my son everyone please my son my son my son
[66:26]son everyone please my son son my son your my son my
[67:43]son my son my son son o'kassem son mother remember me when
[68:16]you see a newly wed deprived of a wedding my sacred blood
[68:27]is my dye a candle of my youth when they turn it
[68:35]off my blood is my dye the sand is my only shroud
[68:46]mother remember me when you see a newlywed my sonokasim my son
[68:56]my son my son son my my son son son son my
[70:16]son the great day is that which i am martyred for god
[70:27]and help my uncle when he remains all alone my mother remnant
[70:39]console her of my death my blood is my dime the sand
[70:47]is my only shroud my son o'kassim my son o'kassim thank you
[72:12]brothers and sisters leaving the english program remember i please ask you
[72:15]that you exit from these front doors brothers and sisters all also
[72:19]we would like to welcome the brothers and sisters from kuiper college
[72:22]in grand rapids the intercultural students who have been with us tonight
[72:26]in the program give them aloha muhammad inshallah will be starting the
[72:36]english program very briefly thank you all for joining inshallah we will
[72:39]continue the program tomorrow night at the same time test one two
[76:00]test one two test valentine's day father's day mother's day thanksgiving christmas
[128:00]christmas follow the sheikh
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