18 - Philosophy of Ethics 2 - Stinginess vs Generosity - Sayed Ahmed Qazwini

16 المشاهدات· 24/07/19

Al-Hujjah Islamic Seminary
1 مشتركين

في محاضرات

Philosophy of Ethics (Akhlaaq) 02, offered in 2020-2021, is now available to take online at Al-Hujjah Islamic Seminary. The first five classes are available to view as a demo to get an idea of how the course is instructed. To register for this class, see all class videos, and take the exams, visit hujjahseminary.com. For any questions, email us at [email protected]

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Transcript

[0:16]and welcome to our 18th session of our class the philosophy of

[0:20]ethics and today in sha allah we will go over a new

[0:26]vice the vice that we will be speaking about today is the

[0:32]vice of stinginess what is the definition of stinginess stinginess is defined

[0:43]as the unwillingness to spend the unwillingness to share and give when

[0:51]you can't let go of your possessions that means you're stingy and

[0:58]someone becomes stingy because of his obsessive attachment to his possessions we

[1:06]all love money we all love our attachments that's not stinginess when

[1:11]it becomes too much when it becomes out of the ordinary this

[1:17]is when it's called stinginess and stinginess can become so severe such

[1:23]that someone can be stingy with his own self yes you've seen

[1:31]certain individuals he's not willing to spend even on himself you see

[1:35]his house terrible his car terrible his clothing even though he could

[1:39]afford now sometimes there may be another explanation for that for why

[1:45]this individual is like that but sometimes no it's because his stinginess

[1:50]has become so firm and strong that he doesn't even want to

[1:53]spend on his own self and like i mentioned last week when

[1:58]we spoke about greed there's a difference between greed and stinginess we

[2:02]said greed is the desire to possess you want more while stinginess

[2:07]is the desire to keep i don't want to give away so

[2:10]that's why we said there's there can be someone that's greedy but

[2:14]generous he wants and then he gives it away and there could

[2:18]be someone that's content he doesn't want but he's stinginess he's stingy

[2:22]he doesn't want to give anything so this is the definition of

[2:29]stinginess the opposing virtue is generosity when we are trying to get

[2:32]rid of this vice stinginess we try to replace it with al-qaram

[2:35]al-jud generosity what is generosity generosity as an act is to give

[2:45]when you give your wealth to someone when you share your wealth

[2:51]your belongings your time your knowledge this is called a generous act

[2:58]but remember in this class we try to learn the disposition not

[3:03]the act itself so as a disposition generosity is what is when

[3:10]you are not attached to your belongings when you naturally give away

[3:16]without feeling that difficulty inner difficulty remember we said someone can give

[3:22]out millions but he has to you know struggle so much to

[3:25]do that he still has a a stingy nephs he hasn't learned

[3:32]the the disposition of generosity that generosity as a quality is when

[3:37]you naturally give away you don't feel the difficulty likewise if you

[3:44]remember we said in the early sessions of this class even if

[3:47]you don't give you can still be generous imagine someone that is

[3:50]has the disposition of generosity but he has nobody to give to

[3:54]or he has no money to give that means this is a

[3:58]stingy person no so as a disposition generosity does it have to

[4:02]do with the act yes the act stems from the disposition itself

[4:07]and finally the highest level of generosity is called al is also

[4:15]a virtue is when it's called altruism in english and that is

[4:24]when you give to others and deprive yourself when i have only

[4:29]one loaf of bread either i eat it or brother ali eats

[4:32]it i decide to give it to brother ali this is called

[4:36]ethan i give and i deprive myself like bait in the famous

[4:39]story in suratul and son where they gave their food to the

[4:43]three beggars the mushkin the team and the asir and they deprive

[4:48]their own selves this is the highest level of generosity that when

[4:51]you give others when you don't have now when it comes to

[4:59]generosity there are certain etiquettes of generosity and giving so if you

[5:03]want to learn the true generosity that teach us this is what

[5:08]generosity means number one when you give either to a beggar to

[5:12]a friend to a family any individual maybe the first etiquette of

[5:18]giving of generosity is that you give even before you are asked

[5:21]some people only when they're asked they give others which are the

[5:27]truly generous individuals even before they are asked they give when they

[5:31]know someone is in need they will go and give they don't

[5:33]wait till that person comes and asks and this is mentioned in

[5:37]the hadith that one of the qualities of a believers when you

[5:39]see someone in the community a brother or sister is in need

[5:41]don't wait until they come and ask sometimes they won't ask because

[5:46]it's difficult to ask sometimes some people they have so much self-respect

[5:49]it's not you know arrogance or ego no it's in arabic it's

[5:54]called some people they have respect that they can't go and ask

[6:00]because they consider that as a form of humiliation so they'll never

[6:04]ask so a true generous person gives before he is asked number

[6:12]two a true generous person when he gives he preserves the dignity

[6:14]of the person that he gives to he doesn't humiliate him he

[6:18]doesn't let him feel less lower he doesn't do it in a

[6:22]condescending way some people they give yeah take it i don't want

[6:25]i don't want to see you again or something other people do

[6:29]when they give they keep on mentioning it after a month after

[6:33]a year you know minna they place amenna on you you feel

[6:36]bad this is not a generous person generous person gives and he

[6:40]never ever remembers it and there's a story about imam al-hasan alaih-salam

[6:45]about a man that came and he told him a beautiful poem

[6:49]he had so much honor and respect but he was in need

[6:52]he knew he could go to the imam and the imam would

[6:55]respect him he would not violate his sanctity and dignity so he

[6:58]asked him through a poem because it's difficult to say give me

[7:02]money but through a poem it's easier he told him you know

[7:11]when we mention the example of generosity imam al-hasan is obviously on

[7:15]the top of the list and remember when he spoke about virtue

[7:18]ethics the theory of aristotle the best way in order for you

[7:22]to learn the virtue is to see someone practicing it learn it

[7:26]from a virtuous person so you want to learn generosity learn it

[7:31]from imam al hasan so he asked him he says i have

[7:45]nothing left that i can sell and you can tell just by

[7:47]looking at me the only thing that i have left that's worthy

[7:50]is my dignity and i did not want to sell it but

[7:55]i saw you're the best buyer basically when i sell my dignity

[8:00]you're gonna preserve it i know you'll give me without violating my

[8:02]dignity you won't make me feel bad lord so the imam he

[8:06]quickly understood he went he took whatever he had he gave it

[8:08]to him and the imam replied through a poem showing the true

[8:11]generosity of the imam he told them this is what i want

[8:26]to speak about preserve dignity he told them you came at a

[8:35]bad time forgive me i don't have more to give you than

[8:38]this but take this and act as if you never asked and

[8:42]i will pretend as if i never gave you so if i

[8:45]see you in five minutes from now it's like you're a random

[8:49]person don't remember don't remind the person that you gave him because

[8:52]sometimes it's humiliating for the person preserve the individual's dignity it's as

[8:58]if i never ever gave you that's number two number three when

[9:04]you give this is a generous person a generous person gives without

[9:07]expecting a return there are many people that give today but how

[9:12]do you know if they're truly doing it out of the disposition

[9:16]of generosity when someone gives without expecting a return this is true

[9:22]generosity because many times people in this country they give why because

[9:29]tax exempt exactly tax deductions is this generosity no way this is

[9:36]not generosity the act is called a generous act he donated 5

[9:39]million to this university to this whatever but in reality there's no

[9:43]disposition he's doing it he's benefiting from it many people they do

[9:46]this you know they donate to islamic centers and then they want

[9:49]the you know the tax deductible whatever slip this isn't generosity my

[9:54]friends it's good but it's not true generosity likewise some people when

[9:58]they pay homes their homes they want tax deductible they want i

[10:01]don't know what they want to benefit 20 ways through it or

[10:05]sometimes simply recognition i want you to place a plaque for me

[10:10]on the in your masjid in your hospital in your orphanage that's

[10:13]a return now i'm not saying this is haram but if we're

[10:17]speaking remember about virtues versus vice if you truly want to be

[10:22]virtuous remove that vice that's a vice when you ask people to

[10:24]that goes back to riyadh remember we spoke about recognition or sometimes

[10:29]you give and you want the person you know to do a

[10:33]favor for you this isn't generosity generosity you give remember like the

[10:37]quran says give they say we do it for allah we don't

[10:46]want any return from it we don't even want a thanks from

[10:50]you thank you we don't that we don't even want that and

[10:53]finally the hadith tell us a truly generous person is the one

[11:00]who even when he takes remember we said all when he gives

[11:02]he doesn't want to return the hadith tell us a generous person

[11:06]even when he takes he takes with the intention of giving later

[11:12]you see not only does he give not expecting a return even

[11:18]when he takes he takes with the intention that people take from

[11:21]him later look at this the imam says he says the generous

[11:33]person eats from the food of people why so that they would

[11:38]eat from his food tomorrow because if you brother ali invite me

[11:43]to have lunch at your house and i come and i eat

[11:46]if i'm truly a generous person i will come and i will

[11:50]eat from your food why so that tomorrow when i invite you

[11:54]you'll come and eat in my house because if you invite me

[11:57]and i come you're gonna have to come to my house too

[11:59]that's disrespectful i come your house you don't come so the generous

[12:03]person even when he eats from other people's foods he's doing it

[12:06]with the intention that they come tomorrow and they eat at his

[12:09]house subhanallah you see how a generous person is and then he

[12:13]says and the stingy person he doesn't go to invitations because then

[12:19]they're going to expect that he invites them back so if someone

[12:22]doesn't come to your invitations it may be because he's stingy maybe

[12:26]we can't always accuse but maybe what about when people request their

[12:31]name to be read to the audience that goes exactly under what

[12:36]i mentioned that's also a type of return why are they doing

[12:38]it now we have to ask about their motive if it's for

[12:43]recognition this is riya this is haram if it's to encourage other

[12:45]people maybe that could be good but usually even if it's not

[12:50]haram it's not good it's not a virtuous act it's not a

[12:53]act that we should do to you know when we ask people

[12:57]to read out our names why we're doing it for god god

[13:01]knows and he's going to write my name so what's the point

[13:03]of having other people remember i mentioned this in the lecture about

[13:06]versus the more private you keep between you and allah the greater

[13:12]the reward will be the benefits of generosity what are the benefits

[13:17]of generosity number one that hadith tell us that a generous person

[13:21]is loved you want to be loved in your community and your

[13:27]family be generous the hadith of the prophet says a generous person

[13:35]is close to god because generosity is a good it's a virtue

[13:38]he's also close to the people meaning they love him people love

[13:43]generous individuals and he is close to paradise of course and subhanallah

[13:48]generosity is one of those virtues that makes people love you even

[13:54]if you have many other vices let's say someone is has many

[13:58]vices he's arrogant he's a narcissist he's i don't know greedy whatever

[14:05]but he's generous generosity makes people forget about your other vices usually

[14:10]and i've seen examples of this people that are truly generous their

[14:12]house is always open they always help without hesitation even though they

[14:16]may have certain flaws people forget about your flaws when you have

[14:19]when you have the uh virtue of generosity likewise it's a virtue

[14:25]that allah mentions that how you know it makes other vices tolerable

[14:31]look at this hadith from where he says it's very interesting he

[14:34]says he says you have two people a young individual who commits

[14:49]sins right and you have but he's generous and then you have

[14:52]an old man who prays the whole day abid but he is

[14:55]stingy now they both have good and bad but which one is

[15:00]closer to allah which one does allah favor allah favors the young

[15:03]sinner that is generous over the old stingy person that you know

[15:08]prays and does now the young sinner also is doing haram no

[15:13]that doesn't mean he should continue but that means his generosity is

[15:18]so great that it makes him even better than the person that

[15:21]is stingy but he commits good deeds so subhanallah generosity you know

[15:25]it'll make you even your enemies your rivals will love you or

[15:31]their hatred will become less if i have the quality of generosity

[15:35]a disbeliever who's i've noticed this you know a disbeliever who's generous

[15:39]people love more than a believer who's stingy because at least they

[15:45]say this this believer his kuffar is for himself but his generosity

[15:48]or benefit benefiting from while the believer who's stingy he's beheed benefiting

[15:54]from his iman but he's stingy with other people he doesn't want

[15:58]to help other people so people don't love him so this is

[16:01]number one one of the benefits of generosity you're loved number two

[16:06]amir al-mu'min have good manners for they these two things increase your

[16:24]risk and bring love so love we spoke about and the imam

[16:28]says generosity increases your risk when you give allah gives you more

[16:31]so it has an opposite effect people think when they give they

[16:35]will have lesser israel right if i have five thousand dollars i

[16:40]give one thousand i have less the imam says no the more

[16:44]you give the more allah will give you so this is number

[16:50]two number three the third benefit of generosity is that it lessens

[16:55]your punishment if you have sins and you're generous your generosity will

[16:59]be your shafi your it will intercede on your behalf and lessen

[17:06]mitigate the punishment where is that mentioned in a hadith from rasulullah

[17:09]rasulullah he spoke about he spoke to adi even his father was

[17:22]the legend and the symbol of generosity every person in arabia looked

[17:27]up to hadam why because of his generosity it was unbelievable even

[17:30]rasulullah praised him for his generosity but he was not a muslim

[17:36]so he was a mushrik the prophet tells his son this he

[17:41]tells him he adam your father should be punished but because of

[17:50]his generosity allah will lessen his punishment allah will save him from

[17:55]the punishment so this shows us that if i am generous that

[17:58]will help in lessening and mitigating and alleviating the adab of allah

[18:07]from me so this is one of the effects of generosity so

[18:11]the harms of stinginess number one one of the harms of stinginess

[18:16]according to amir al-mu'min alayhi is that a stingy person does not

[18:27]enter paradise a stingy person does not now why does the imam

[18:39]say that what does this hadith mean look heaven paradise is a

[18:44]pure place allah only wants good people there there is no room

[18:49]for impurities stinginess is an impurity so if there is stinginess in

[18:53]your heart you can't be in jannah right it doesn't make sense

[18:55]imagine if arrogant people live in jannah and stingy people and greedy

[18:59]people envious people jenna won't be jannah anymore it'll be a place

[19:03]of fighting and bickering and and and right so in order for

[19:08]paradise to be a place of peace we have to be peaceful

[19:12]people our hearts have to be emptied of all vices so if

[19:16]i want to go to paradise i have to try at least

[19:19]now sometimes you know you try you don't reach fine but you

[19:21]have to try at least to get rid of the vice of

[19:24]stinginess in your heart or else the imam says you will not

[19:29]see janna and another reason the imam says this is because sometimes

[19:33]stinginess leads to other sins so if you're a stingy person you

[19:37]won't go to paradise because stinginess will make you commit other sins

[19:39]and thus you will not go to paradise so the imam isn't

[19:43]speaking about someone who does all the ajibot stays away from all

[19:46]the muharram but he's still stingy because usually that's unlikely when you're

[19:52]stingy that's going to lead to the second harm that i'll speak

[19:55]about right now the second harm of stinginess is what it prevents

[19:58]you from paying your wajabat your financial dues like homson zakat hum

[20:04]upon everyone 20 of the surplus of what you make so if

[20:11]you make 100 000 right you spent 70 000 30 000 as

[20:17]extras savings you have to pay one-fifth of the 30 000 chromos

[20:20]have to say that our need and the other half to your

[20:25]merjad that you follow now most people based on my experience do

[20:32]not pay their homes why sometimes it's because of ignorance sometimes it's

[20:36]because of misunderstandings but most of the time it's because of stinginess

[20:40]and the more money you have the more stingy you become remember

[20:44]we spoke about that remember the story of talaba where when allah

[20:47]the companion gave him so much wealth he gave him you know

[20:54]those sheep and he could not give he could not give the

[20:56]zakat because of the stimulus because when you get the dunya you

[21:01]also and allah gives you something from the dunya gives you wealth

[21:03]he gives you love of the dunya with it so you're attracted

[21:06]to it you can't give it i remember there's a scholar that

[21:09]once told me a man came and he gave him his uh

[21:12]he gave him homs to deliver to the merger and it was

[21:16]a big amount he said the entire night i could not sleep

[21:18]thinking should i give it this is a big amount what if

[21:21]tomorrow something happens what if what if what if what if you

[21:24]know this is the jihadis shaytan trying to tell you not to

[21:29]give so stinginess will prevent you from paying your home sins a

[21:33]cut and most people unfortunately they do not pay their homes why

[21:37]one reason laziness ignorance another reason could be because of their stinginess

[21:41]and look the quran interestingly speaks about the successful person who is

[21:48]the successful person allah says in the holy quran this verse the

[21:57]quran says the one who is saved from his stinginess so it

[22:03]says if stinginess is a monster that lives inside you if you

[22:07]are saved if you're able to overcome your stinginess you're a successful

[22:12]person so it's not easy my friends stinginess will definitely lead you

[22:18]to not perform relinquish some of your wajabat and possibly even commit

[22:25]some muhammad and that's why my with your brothers and sisters stinginess

[22:31]is considered as one of the worst vices if i were you

[22:35]know to write the worst vices possible the imams consider one of

[22:41]the worst to be stinginess because it truly it takes down your

[22:48]your value you put yourself down when you're stingy stinginess is a

[22:55]form of disgrace and another hadith the prophet says the heart of

[23:02]a believer should never contain any strangeness because it you know it's

[23:08]just it puts your worth down your value down the eyes of

[23:11]people when you're so attached to your money and your wealth and

[23:14]all you care about is that you truly are not respecting yourself

[23:18]people won't respect you anymore and i've noticed this as stingy people

[23:22]not only they're not loved they're not respected so we have to

[23:26]truly work on this remember the point of this class is to

[23:28]try to remove vices from us stinginess is something many of us

[23:34]have and we don't notice it unfortunately we do not notice that

[23:38]we are stingy but we are stingy which leads me to my

[23:44]next slide diagnosis how do i know if i am stingy 99

[23:50]percent of stingy people will deny that they are stingy they are

[23:53]in a state of denial that's why they need to go through

[23:57]this diagnosis stage how number one how do i know if i'm

[24:04]stingy a stingy person always listen carefully brothers and sisters a stingy

[24:10]person always makes excuses for not spending and for not donating so

[24:15]for example he wants he needs something in his house right but

[24:21]he does he's stingy he doesn't want to buy it so he

[24:24]keeps on making excuses you know what there's nothing good out in

[24:29]the market you know what um this you know this refrigerator works

[24:33]i just we just have to wait a couple of days on

[24:38]it you know what i would buy it but it's going to

[24:41]break after excuse after excuse after excuse sometimes they may be valid

[24:46]excuses but when i'm putting too much excuses remember that's a sign

[24:50]that i'm stingy likewise excuses for not donating for charitable causes mentions

[24:57]this in a hadith he says he says a stingy person always

[25:05]makes excuses for being stingy he doesn't say it's thin it's you

[25:09]know it doesn't admit that it's stinginess he makes excuses for not

[25:12]spending and not donating for example let's go to homes you tell

[25:17]someone why don't you pay homs the true reason is he's stingy

[25:21]he doesn't want to give but the real reason is what what

[25:23]what will he tell you you know what who says homs is

[25:26]even wajib you see these people they're always nagging complaining or they're

[25:29]always doubting everything who says wajib what do scholars do with homes

[25:35]anyway you know i will give homes but i don't i can't

[25:39]trust anyone and so on and so forth the excuses never finish

[25:42]brother sister the real reason is your stinginess leave the excuses aside

[25:46]so if i find myself making excuses to not giving that means

[25:52]i'm stingy donate to a mosque to a masjid you know what

[25:56]they say sinji people ah there's too many mosques we don't need

[25:58]another mosque here there's too many people that are giving why should

[26:04]i give you know what the did they really need this money

[26:07]this message what are they doing with it now sometimes your concern

[26:12]may be valid maybe really this message doesn't deserve maybe this message

[26:15]isn't doing anything with it but when i make too many excuses

[26:19]that's a sign remember diagnosis level we always look for signs if

[26:22]you see two three signs just like with medical condition so you

[26:25]have to worry and a stingy person my friends is an expert

[26:31]in hiding his stinginess and disguising it as a valid concern that

[26:37]he has or she has for not giving so when you find

[26:41]people that always make excuses know that this is a stingy person

[26:45]another example one second mother a beggar a beggar comes and asks

[26:48]you is he a real beggar who says he's a real beggar

[26:52]maybe he's a rich millionaire that just wants to come and make

[26:55]money or he's rich and he just feels like begging and i've

[26:58]heard this people they say this oh don't give to this beggar

[27:00]beggars make more than you and i make right what is he

[27:05]gonna buy with it he's probably going to buy some weed whether

[27:06]he's going to buy drugs alcohol don't give either if you don't

[27:09]want to give stay quiet just don't say anything and if you

[27:14]want to give give right because remember a generous person naturally gives

[27:18]he doesn't want to return he doesn't care what he just gives

[27:24]naturally so if you have your reservations that's fine but when it's

[27:28]a constant quality in me that i make excuses that's a sign

[27:32]that i'm stingy and the reason my dear brothers and sisters let

[27:36]me ask you this question the reason why a stingy person you

[27:41]know does that he makes excuses you know why he does that

[27:44]why doesn't a stingy person just stay quiet why does he keep

[27:51]on making excuses for not giving he doesn't want to see he

[27:55]doesn't want his team he doesn't want to seem stingy and for

[27:57]another reason because he knows that others are always suspecting him of

[28:03]being cheap so right now you all tell me say it can

[28:07]you donate you know for this so i know that you've been

[28:13]suspecting that i'm cheap and and i'm not donating so i feel

[28:16]uncomfortable so i try to what justify so he's in that position

[28:22]so he feels like he constantly has to defend his stinginess that's

[28:25]why he can't stay quiet he knows people are on to him

[28:28]people are suspecting people are what people are not idiots they know

[28:33]so he feels like he constantly or else the generous person doesn't

[28:37]feel like anybody's so panel if you feel like that somebody is

[28:41]you know suspecting that you're stingy most likely you are stingy not

[28:45]necessarily sometimes it could be wrongly done but if you feel like

[28:50]you know you're being attacked and accused of being a stingy person

[28:53]you constantly have to defend yourself that you're not stingy that means

[28:58]congratulations that's a sign that you are stingy so that's number one

[29:01]number two a second symptom of stinginess or a second sign is

[29:09]that a stingy person when he donates he sees his donation as

[29:13]a great achievement while a generous person belittles his his donation and

[29:20]this goes back to remember i spoke about i think when i

[29:24]spoke about narcissism is when i am you know so flattered by

[29:29]my own good deeds oh wow i feel so good about my

[29:34]good deeds i spoke about this last year it's when you do

[29:37]something and you think of it as such a big big deal

[29:40]this is versus remember we said some people who do good deeds

[29:46]and they say it's nothing so a stingy person he donates 500

[29:50]he thinks he's op he's conquered palestine he's open palestine he speaks

[29:54]he wants cnn to report it any opportunity he has he wants

[30:00]to speak about it right while a generous person doesn't even want

[30:06]to mention it and do you know why a stingy person sees

[30:11]his donation as being so great because remember well that's one reason

[30:20]to you know to persuade people that he's not stingy but another

[30:23]reason is you can't blame him a stingy person is really attached

[30:27]to his belongings he loves them so when he's taking out from

[30:33]his belonging belongings and giving it to someone that truly required so

[30:36]much effort from him so because it was so difficult for him

[30:41]he sees it as such a great achievement he thinks he thinks

[30:44]everybody is like him that when they gave 500 oh they had

[30:49]to you know truly go through jihad to do it he doesn't

[30:51]know a generous person just does it without even thinking about it

[30:54]so that's why he thinks it's so great because it was so

[30:57]hard for him so you can't really blame him i mean you

[30:59]can blame him for his stinginess but you can't really blame him

[31:02]if he sees it such as such a great act because it

[31:05]was so difficult for him versus a generous person gives and he

[31:07]does not even care this is a sign of a generous person

[31:14]he just gives without even thinking so this is number two number

[31:21]three a third sign of a stingy person we said one of

[31:24]the harms of stinginess is that prevents you from paying your financial

[31:29]dues your islamic dues like your fulfillments are cut so one of

[31:33]the obvious signs of stinginess if you find it very hard to

[31:36]pay your homes that could mean that you are stingy if i

[31:41]have to force myself to donate if i have to force myself

[31:45]to give that means i'm attached too much to my wealth that

[31:50]could mean that i'm stingy that's number three number four listen this

[31:54]is an interesting sign when i am asked to help someone let's

[31:59]say i come in i say there's a poor guy in the

[32:00]community we're trying to gather 5 000 for him can you give

[32:07]200 if you feel bothered when people ask you to contribute and

[32:11]help that means you're stingy i've seen some people they're so irritated

[32:15]when you ask them to help for a cause to donate to

[32:17]give to whatever right why this shows that they are stingy a

[32:25]generous person is never bothered by the fact that if he's asked

[32:30]by someone you know give i you know even if he's even

[32:34]if he doesn't give that's besides the point the point is he's

[32:39]not bothered if i am not bothered by people constantly asking that

[32:44]means i'm generous even if i don't give them that means that

[32:48]means at least i'm not stingy but if i'm bothered i just

[32:51]i hate it when people ask me to give that could mean

[32:56]that i am stingy so now let's go to the next stage

[33:00]the cause stage what causes stinginess number one love of the dunya

[33:07]and we spoke about this during greed when you love the dunya

[33:10]you love money you can't give it up right stinginess is when

[33:14]you can't so the more you love it the more it's going

[33:16]to be difficult for you to give it up the more dunya

[33:19]you have the stingier you will be and that's why i mentioned

[33:24]last week that studies show the wealthier donate less percentage of their

[33:27]wealth than the middle class the poor individuals because the more they

[33:31]have the stingier they become so that's the first cause love of

[33:34]dunya if you love dunya cause you to be stingy and number

[33:38]two some people are stingy because they fear if they give they'll

[33:43]become poor they'll become in need so they have this insecurity they

[33:51]have they lack the reliance on allah when you don't have reliance

[33:54]on allah what does that lead to at least it leads to

[33:58]stinginess they don't want to give anything they want because they're afraid

[34:01]they'll get poor there's a pandemic there's a recession and so on

[34:07]and so forth where is your quran allah rely on god he

[34:09]is the sustainer so these are two causes of stinginess and finally

[34:16]the treatment stage how do we treat the stinginess and this is

[34:21]the most important stage after this entire all these minutes that we're

[34:24]speaking we go to the important part of our class how do

[34:27]we treat the vice of stinginess that most of us suffer from

[34:32]now number one we said one cause is love of dunya so

[34:38]you treat stinginess by treating your love of dunya and we spoke

[34:43]about that last week if i am in love with the dunya

[34:45]how do i take this love of dunya out of my heart

[34:49]we spoke about that last week does anyone remember when we spoke

[34:55]about greed if i love the dunya love of the dunya leads

[34:57]to greed and at least stinginess so you want to get rid

[35:01]of stinginess you want to get rid of greed get rid of

[35:03]the love of the dunya how i mentioned that last week i

[35:06]mentioned a couple of ways what did we say can someone give

[35:10]an example learn how to be content accented exactly that's that's that's

[35:18]the same one one point i mentioned is look at the dark

[35:22]side of the dunya so that you are repelled by it look

[35:27]at disease look at sicknesses look at you know all the problems

[35:29]and suffering of this dunya so that it serves as a reminder

[35:35]that dunya this dunya is not worth it once you realize this

[35:37]dunya is not worth it you're not going to be in love

[35:39]and all the other points go back you will see tree the

[35:43]love of the dunya try to get rid of it and you

[35:47]will get greed and stinginess both out of your heart so that's

[35:52]number one number two remember the harms of stinginess and the benefits

[35:58]of generosity that we mentioned we said that a stingy person is

[36:04]hated in the community and a generous person is loved so tell

[36:07]yourself if you have this do you want to be loved or

[36:13]no is it worth it that i become a little more generous

[36:16]i give so that i am loved it's worth it even though

[36:17]that's not the highest level of generosity because you should do it

[36:21]for allah you should do it without expecting a return versus i

[36:24]wanted to do it for people to love me if you remember

[36:29]we spoke last year the three motives of doing good deeds of

[36:33]being virtuous we said some people they do they're virtuous because of

[36:38]the worldly benefits right the reputation they're loved some people they do

[36:42]it for the fill up some people they do it just because

[36:45]that's their nature so remember the benefits of of being generous people

[36:51]will love you and remember the harms of stinginess you'll be hated

[36:54]you don't know that people don't show you that maybe in their

[36:57]they don't express their true face but when people think you're cheap

[37:02]and stingy they start hating you so try to persuade your snips

[37:06]to be a little less dingy and more generous by telling it

[37:09]look nobody likes you in the way you are you want to

[37:14]be loved a little more spend a little more it's a price

[37:16]you have to pay there's a hadith it's beautiful he says he

[37:32]says that generosity attracts your opponents if you're generous even your opponents

[37:38]and your enemies they will love you they will be attracted to

[37:45]you while stinginess will repel even your children generosity will attract your

[37:50]enemies stinginess will repel your own children i know brothers says i

[37:54]personally know children that have a wealthy father but he's stingy he

[37:59]doesn't give us children they hate him they can't wait until he

[38:02]dies and they'll inherit him they don't say it they don't express

[38:07]it but i know that no one can stand the stingy person

[38:08]even your kids will hate you your wife will hate you your

[38:13]brothers and sisters your biological brothers sisters can't stand you if you're

[38:18]stingy is it worth because of your love of this stupid money

[38:20]of your business whatever that you lose everyone everyone hates you so

[38:24]use this motive to get rid of stinginess tell yourself it's not

[38:29]worth it because of this money everybody's hating me even my kids

[38:32]generous person is loved by everyone so this is number two number

[38:41]three remember we said one of the causes of stinginess is what

[38:44]is when you think that by giving you're going to be poor

[38:48]there's a pandemic who knows what the economy is going to it's

[38:52]going to happen next year right we're going through a recession that's

[38:55]why i don't want to give we constantly fear that we're going

[38:59]to be in need that's why we don't help others that's why

[39:02]we don't donate if that is the reason for my stinginess how

[39:06]do i treat that you have to understand that giving others giving

[39:14]helping others and donating will never make you poor well this is

[39:19]the promise of allah and i'll get to that allah will never

[39:23]make you in need and poor because you helped others in fact

[39:27]listen carefully in fact the opposite is true what do i mean

[39:32]if you don't give you may become poor you'll become in need

[39:37]you see most people they're reluctant to give because they feel later

[39:41]they'll be in need this is my savings i need it for

[39:43]you know the days that i may have problems so if i

[39:47]didn't donate 5000 now and i have an emergency tomorrow and i'm

[39:51]laid off what do i do right these are the whispers of

[39:56]the shaytan the quran tells us anytime you hear something telling you

[39:59]oh i may be in need tomorrow that's why i shouldn't give

[40:02]this is the shaitaan where does allah mention that in the quran

[40:05]and surah till baqarah verse 268 allah threatens you with poverty every

[40:17]time you want to donate you want to give you want to

[40:19]do something there's something in your mind telling you there's a recession

[40:26]coming and i may be laid off and that's why i should

[40:28]have spent this is the shaitan this is the quran telling you

[40:31]so if you ever hear that don't listen to that that's the

[40:35]shaytaan that's it he's been exposed so why listen to that whisper

[40:38]and allah subhanahu ta'ala like i said allah will never make you

[40:43]in need because you helped someone so tell yourself if you feel

[40:47]you have stinginess and your stinginess is because of that insecurity you

[40:52]think you're going to be in knee tell yourself you will never

[40:54]be in need because you help others allah says this in the

[40:59]quran where he says he says whoever has taqwa he fears allah

[41:10]he follows the orders of allah which one of the orders of

[41:14]allah is to be generous and to help allah from a source

[41:30]that you never thought was possible a source that you were never

[41:34]aware of this is the quran allah promising you allah not my

[41:37]job not my boss trust me it's allah so he says don't

[41:41]be afraid to give i will give you from a source that

[41:45]you never thought was possible and like i said what we fail

[41:49]in understanding is the exact opposite is true if you give you

[41:53]won't be poor if you don't give allah may make you in

[41:56]need and poor this is the hadith of imam listen carefully a

[41:59]stingy person has to understand this equation he has to understand this

[42:14]says the imam says the more god gives you the wealthier you

[42:25]are the more people will be in need of you right that's

[42:28]obvious the more you have the more people will be in need

[42:32]of you then the imam says if you help others you share

[42:34]what allah has given you you share it with others allah will

[42:38]increase his name upon you his favors and blessings and sustenance but

[42:43]if not the imam says if you decide to be stingy and

[42:46]you don't want to help the imam says allah may take away

[42:50]the favors from you because when allah gives you he gives you

[42:53]wealth he gives it with the condition that you share it with

[42:56]others if you don't want to share it with others allah says

[43:00]give it back to me i'll find someone else better than you

[43:02]to share it so being cheap and stingy is what's going to

[43:05]cause you to become poor it may cause you to become poor

[43:09]and in need not being generous generosity never leads to poverty it's

[43:13]stinginess that leads to poverty so we have it completely the opposite

[43:18]brothers and sisters this is how i have to tell myself in

[43:22]order that i can extract and get away of this vice of

[43:26]stinginess from me so if my motive for being stinginess is because

[43:29]i fear i will lose this money if i give then by

[43:35]being stingy you may lose it and that's why it's narrowing that

[43:38]imam al-hassen he would never ever say no to someone he was

[43:43]asked once why he was asked why is it that you never

[43:47]refuse anyone you don't even vet the guy you just give he

[43:51]says because allah has always been generous with me right allah has

[43:57]always been generous with me and he expects that i am generous

[44:03]with others i am afraid if i am not generous with people

[44:05]allah will not be generous with me remember allah treats you like

[44:10]how you want to be treated so if you don't want to

[44:14]help others why do you want allah to help you that's a

[44:16]form of hypocrisy that's a form of of selfishness i don't want

[44:21]to help others but i want allah to help me so hassan

[44:23]said allah always gives me and i always give to others i'm

[44:28]afraid if i don't give others allah won't give me so it's

[44:31]a two-way right equation i give others allah gives me so allah

[44:35]gives you so that you pass it on if you keep it

[44:38]all to yourself allah is going to stop giving you according to

[44:39]the imams so stinginess is what leads to losing the money not

[44:47]generosity so if you have 30 000 in your bank account and

[44:48]you don't want to spend you don't want to give anything because

[44:51]you're afraid that you're going to lose it and be in need

[44:53]by giving you'll never be in need by keeping it and being

[44:59]stingy subhanallah materialistically economically maybe it doesn't make sense but this is

[45:03]what allah teaches he is and we have to trust him when

[45:07]he says that so this is number three and finally number four

[45:13]number four how do i get rid of this vice of stinginess

[45:19]inside me repetition we spoke about this repetition give and give and

[45:27]give until that disposition develops inside you remember we said one way

[45:30]to develop a disposition is to practice practice makes perfect do it

[45:34]do it do it do it until it becomes a disposition until

[45:39]stinginess is replaced and subhanallah the author of the book the book

[45:44]that i sent in the group he says something so interesting he

[45:50]says in the beginning even if you don't give for allah you

[45:53]give for recognition for example that's good do it because the point

[45:58]is you want to teach your nephs to let go even if

[46:01]it's for recognition once it becomes a habit i let go i

[46:06]let go then try to teach yourself okay now do it for

[46:09]god so do it in two steps so in the beginning if

[46:11]you want to learn generosity give and give every day make a

[46:16]habit at least twice i give even if it's a dollar so

[46:18]your nest learns generosity even if it's not for allah slowly you're

[46:24]going to remove that vice once the vice goes away then you

[46:27]replace it with true genuine generosity which is when you do it

[46:31]without a return strictly for allah so slowly you can build that

[46:41]disposition so the fourth way is to always practice practice practice makes

[46:44]perfect finally i will end with this remember last year we spoke

[46:48]about when we spoke about virtues and vice we spoke about the

[46:52]golden mean of aristotle and we said that the imams also spoke

[46:57]about this that every virtue there is a vice on this side

[46:59]and a vice on the other side sometimes you know too little

[47:03]sometimes too much so the virtue of generosity is right in the

[47:09]middle on that side we spoke about is what being cheap and

[47:15]being stingy sometimes you can overdo it and it also becomes a

[47:21]vice we call that pro legality pro is extra extravagant spending is

[47:27]also advice so not spending being cheap and just holding on to

[47:32]everything is bad and too much extravagant spending is also a vice

[47:38]for example giving too much while denying your family this is considered

[47:43]as advice says it is better for me if i enter the

[48:02]store and i buy meat for my family and they want it

[48:05]this is better and more recommended than buying a slave and freeing

[48:11]it so i have money either i buy me and feed my

[48:12]family no he didn't say feed them they have food but they

[48:17]want meat right or i buy a slave and i free it

[48:20]there's so much tawab reward for buying a slave and freeing it

[48:25]so the imam says it is better to feed your family than

[48:30]to buy the slave why because this is a form of when

[48:33]you're your own family you're neglecting them you want to go and

[48:37]build a masjid you want to go on free slaves no this

[48:38]is israel this is too much on that side this is also

[48:42]a vice so everything has to be remember in moderation remember everything

[48:47]has to be in moderation so generosity is good as long as

[48:52]you're doing your other obligations you're giving your family you're spending on

[48:57]them and you're not just wasting the money and that's why the

[49:01]quran speaks about the prophet don't be cheap don't be stingy like

[49:09]this the quran says meaning i'm not going to give.

[49:12]don't open your hands like this and give everything so be right

[49:19]in the middle moderation is always good thank you so much brothers

[49:25]and sisters i

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18 - Philosophy of Ethics 2 - Stinginess vs Generosity - Sayed Ahmed Qazwini

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18 - Philosophy of Ethics 2 - Stinginess vs Generosity - Sayed Ahmed Qazwini

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