Ramadan Night 3 - Sheikh Abdulrahman Cherri

27 المشاهدات· 24/03/22

MYC Media
مشتركين

في محاضرات

أظهر المزيد

Transcript

[0:18]alhamd Allah subhana wa tala says in the noble Quran [Music] this

[0:41]Quran is a book that guides to that which is the straightest

[0:49]this is one of the meanings or interpretations of this verse when

[0:55]Allah subhana wa T describes the Noble book that he had revealed

[0:59]onto the heart of the Prophet Sall through the angel Gabriel he

[1:08]describes this book as a book of guidance but we ask ourselves

[1:17]guidance to what what are you guiding towards what is it that

[1:20]you're trying to present to us in this book and we have

[1:26]a number of different descriptions one of them was included in this

[1:31]verse that is it is a book that guides to that which

[1:36]is straightest which tells us that there are many different paths and

[1:41]many different directions which a person can take in his or her

[1:45]life what the Quran tries to do is it tries to put

[1:50]us on a straight path a straight path that doesn't involve going

[1:55]through a lot of confusion or going to the wrong direction in

[2:02]order for us to get to the destination that is best for

[2:04]us so when we understand that the Quran is described in this

[2:10]manner then we have to read it with this mentality we have

[2:13]to put this in Our Minds when we approach this book when

[2:18]we read this book that this book has this specific objective in

[2:22]mind when it gives me stories about the prophets and about previous

[2:27]Nations what it's doing is it's giving me examples that I can

[2:34]emulate and follow whenever I'm challenged with something in life in order

[2:40]to know how to decide which direction to go one of the

[2:43]scholars that we have named she he says that the stories in

[2:51]the Quran about the prophets are in reality the stories of humankind

[2:55]the challenges that we go through are exemplified by the stories of

[3:01]the prophets in the Quran when Allah subhana mentions the story of

[3:07]prophet Moses the challenges that Prophet Jacob went through when he lost

[3:14]his son Prophet Joseph peace be upon him he was taken away

[3:17]he was separated from him there was an evil scheme that was

[3:22]done by the brothers of Joseph and Prophet Jacob had to suffer

[3:25]from that he had this difficulty and this pain that he had

[3:31]to go through and a lot of us suffer from this type

[3:34]of pain as well the type the pain of separation from those

[3:37]who we love now we might suffer in different ways but the

[3:40]pain is the same in one sense when Prophet Joseph Alam is

[3:47]taken into captivity or sold as a slave and then raised by

[3:54]pharaoh and his wife the wife was uh raising him pharaoh was

[4:02]raising him and then he was thrown into jail he was accused

[4:04]falsely of something that he had never done and we all go

[4:10]through this in life we get accused by people for things that

[4:14]we've never done we're thought of in a bad way so these

[4:19]stories exemplify and resemble the challenges that human beings go through in

[4:24]their spiritual journey so when we read them what Allah subhana wants

[4:28]us to understand is that if you are are embarking on a

[4:32]spiritual journey then these are the type of obstacles you're going to

[4:35]become aware of and if you do fall into them then I'm

[4:40]giving you one way to resolve these issues and this brings us

[4:43]back to the topic that we began talking about last night and

[4:49]that is the emotions in the Quran we ended by speaking about

[4:54]emotional intelligence the acronym for that is EI sometimes referred to as

[4:58]EQ as well just like you have an IQ you also have

[5:03]an EQ which describes the level of emotional maturity or intelligence that

[5:13]you have now if we come to define the meaning of emotional

[5:17]intelligence we can Define it in this way this is not a

[5:24]scientific definition but just something to bring the idea closer to our

[5:27]minds it's the ability to recognize under understand and manage one's emotions

[5:33]as well as to empathize with others and handle interpersonal relationships effectively

[5:43]so recognizing and understanding are both related to the intellectual aspect we

[5:47]talked about that yesterday we have the power of reason the faculty

[5:52]of reason to think so one of those aspects is to be

[5:54]able to understand our emotions to understand situations that we go through

[6:00]and understand ourselves as human beings the second aspect is managing one's

[6:06]emotions so it's not just enough to become a philosopher or an

[6:12]expert or a life coach knowing what every emotion is and knowing

[6:15]what's good and what's bad that's not sufficient it's important to know

[6:19]these things but on top of that what we have to be

[6:24]able to do is to manage our own emotions just knowing something

[6:28]is not enough and this is something that's been emphasized upon in

[6:31]Islam the IM says that knowledge and action are like the two

[6:39]wings of a bird a bird can't fly with only one Wing

[6:43]if you only have the knowledge but not the action you can't

[6:45]fly if you only have action without knowledge you can't fly either

[6:49]because you might be doing the wrong thing you might not be

[6:54]knowing how to decide what the best course of action is so

[6:59]understanding your emotions and knowing how to manage them on a personal

[7:04]level as well as on a social level as well so there's

[7:10]a personal aspect when I'm dealing with my own emotions dealing with

[7:13]my own self if I'm someone who's going through anxiety in my

[7:18]life that's related to me if I have a lot of fear

[7:22]in my life if I have some form of depression in my

[7:26]life this is my own emotion and I have to learn how

[7:30]to deal with this type of emotion this is one aspect the

[7:33]other aspect is dealing with other people emotions that involve my relationships

[7:39]with the other not just with myself how do I deal with

[7:45]my family members how do I deal with my siblings my friends

[7:48]my co-workers the other members of society some people that I don't

[7:52]know I go to a shopping center I go outside I go

[7:55]to the park I get into a situation with someone I don't

[7:59]know how do I deal with that situ situation this is also

[8:02]very important to focus on now there are components of emotional intelligence

[8:09]as well these include what they're not limited to self-awareness self-regulation empathy

[8:18]social skills and motivation now the first one is self-awareness if you're

[8:26]not aware of yourself you're not aware of who you are you

[8:29]not aware of what's going on inside of you then you're not

[8:34]going to be able to develop emotionally or even intellectually if we

[8:39]look at the Hadith that the prophet and the imams have given

[8:42]us and really it's amazing when you start thinking about these topics

[8:46]and you look at theith that we have you begin to understand

[8:51]them in a very different way than what you might have understood

[8:55]at the beginning so the more you learn about things the more

[8:59]you start discovering that this religion has spoken about things and I

[9:03]wasn't aware that it was referring to these realities that I'm aware

[9:06]of right now so if we look at the Hadith where the

[9:10]Prophet or the Imam say that whoever knows himself or herself knows

[9:15]his or her Lord or the Hadith that says that contemplating or

[9:21]meditating for a moment is greater than praying for a year or

[9:25]praying for a thousand years contemplation in for one moment meditating for

[9:35]one moment is better than the worship of a year praying for

[9:42]a whole year worshiping for a whole year is equated to a

[9:46]moment of contemplation why because the most important thing for us to

[9:50]do in life is to understand ourselves it's been equated with understanding

[9:56]God himself the reality of existence the reality of life it cannot

[10:02]occur without contemplation so self-awareness is very important to understand yourself to

[10:07]understand your feelings to understand your emotions to understand your thinking this

[10:12]is something that's very important but this is not something that occurs

[10:17]by itself you can't wake up in the morning one day and

[10:21]suddenly become a very self-aware person you can make the intention just

[10:25]like someone who you know decides to take a go on a

[10:30]career in their life to study something you don't expect yourself to

[10:33]sleep at night and wake up with a degree do you you

[10:37]can make the intention but you have to work towards that so

[10:41]developing emotional intelligence and emotional maturity is something that requires action you

[10:48]have to perform and practice something in order to develop that maturity

[10:53]and to develop that intelligence you make the intention then you wake

[10:59]up the next day and you say that I want to become

[11:03]a more emotionally intelligent individual in my life I want to become

[11:07]more aware of the nuances of feelings and emotions in my life

[11:10]how do I do that well islamically speaking our Scholars who wrote

[11:17]about this emphasized the fact that we have to strengthen our willpower

[11:22]this is one of the most important things that they tell us

[11:27]we have to do if you strengthen your willpower you gain control

[11:33]over yourself you don't get dragged by your emotions and your feelings

[11:38]and your thoughts if I'm someone who reacts to things without controlling

[11:44]my emotions it means I'm someone who has a weak willpower I

[11:49]don't have strong willpower Al is what they call it in Arabic

[11:55]if I'm weak if I don't have control over my own thoughts

[11:57]and over my own self then I am the weakest of all

[12:03]human beings I cannot even control my own self how can I

[12:06]expect myself to influence other people and to control situations around me

[12:12]so the first thing they say that we have to do is

[12:15]we have to work on strengthening our willpower how do we do

[12:20]that well there's many different ways many different methods one method that

[12:25]is mentioned by some of the scholars is that you have to

[12:28]begin by controlling your imagination and controlling your thoughts and they compare

[12:37]the thoughts to a bird a Wandering bird that flies from Branch

[12:40]to branch and never settles down you think about something your mind

[12:46]jumps to another thought to another thought to another thought to another

[12:50]thought and this constant thinking throughout the whole day that never ends

[12:56]you never have the time to be able to think about what

[13:02]you want to think you're always moving based on what the external

[13:05]influences are doing to you you look at an image it creates

[13:10]an emotion in you you react to it emotionally what you might

[13:13]not be aware that this is happening to you but you walk

[13:18]on the street you look at a billboard you see an advertisement

[13:21]immediately that creates something in your mind and it creates a certain

[13:24]emotion inside of you you scroll through your phone through Tik Tok

[13:29]through any real Instagram you see images you see Memes you see

[13:33]stories and it plays around with your emotion whether you're aware of

[13:40]it or you're not aware of it this control of your emotions

[13:43]means that you're someone who is very weak and someone who doesn't

[13:47]have control over their own emotions is going to suffer a lot

[13:53]in their lives so we have to change that how do we

[13:56]change it we begin practicing and training to control our thoughts how

[14:00]do we do that some of the advice that's given to us

[14:04]by these Scholars is that you have to dedicate a portion of

[14:06]your day to exercising the control of thoughts for example you sit

[14:15]down for a minute to 5 minutes I've mentioned this before but

[14:19]I'll repeat it again because reminders are very important Muhammad Muhammad to

[14:30]sit down every single day and dedicate a certain portion of time

[14:37]they don't give a specific time because every person is different some

[14:41]people cannot sit down for 5 seconds with not without thinking anything

[14:45]it's a very difficult challenge try it yourself when you go home

[14:51]sit down in a room and they recommend that it's a room

[14:53]that has no distractions so if you have a room that doesn't

[14:57]really have a lot of pictures on the walls not a lot

[15:01]of furniture and um a choir area somewhere where it's not close

[15:06]to the kitchen let's say you go and you sit there and

[15:12]you can close your eyes and try to see if you're able

[15:14]to block all the imaginations that you have are you able to

[15:20]sit down and not think of anything I think 99% of us

[15:26]would say that this is impossible we can't do it the moment

[15:29]you close your eyes your thoughts and imaginations are just spinning so

[15:32]fast you can't even catch up with and understand what's going on

[15:39]in your mind now some people think you know when I stand

[15:41]up for prayers the Shan comes and starts whispering in my ears

[15:45]and starts putting thoughts and stories in my mind right but that's

[15:51]not really what's happening what prayers does is it wakes you up

[15:55]to this reality that you're not aware of throughout the day because

[15:57]you're distracted with other things when you stand up for Salat you

[16:04]freeze you can't move anymore so what happens is you begin to

[16:08]start realizing what's going on inside of your mind the thoughts that

[16:11]come to you during prayer are the same thoughts that are running

[16:15]through your mind throughout the day but you're not aware of it

[16:20]why because you're driving a car you're talking to someone you're at

[16:24]work you're doing something your mind is constantly occupied with other stuff

[16:30]and still running in the background so you're not aware of it

[16:33]what prayer does is it stops you from the external actions so

[16:39]you become aware of what's happening in your mind so what you

[16:42]have to do is you sit down in the room you close

[16:45]your eyes and you begin to repel any thought that comes to

[16:53]your mind every time a certain image comes an idea comes you

[16:56]repel it you push it away you you cancel it out you

[17:01]don't think about it at first it's going to seem to be

[17:03]impossible but it just indicates to you how little control you have

[17:11]over over your mind and most of us go through this and

[17:13]you know nowadays with all this technology that we have and all

[17:17]the screen time that we have the colors and the images it

[17:19]just makes it much worse and worse and much more difficult so

[17:23]every individual has to have some portion of time in his or

[17:29]her day where they sit down and they practice this they do

[17:33]this exercise any thought that comes to your mind you repel it

[17:37]at first try it for 5 seconds maybe for a week every

[17:42]day for 5 seconds 10 seconds 15 seconds the more you practice

[17:46]it the better you get at it don't worry about failure you

[17:51]might not succeed for a month you might not succeed in repelling

[17:55]one image or imagination for a whole month but after that month

[18:00]you might succeed in repelling one image and if you do that

[18:04]means that you're starting to gain control over what enters your mind

[18:11]and what goes around around in your mind once you do one

[18:15]then you repel the other image then the third and the fourth

[18:18]and slowly you strengthen yourself and you gain control over their the

[18:24]thoughts that you have some of our Scholars do this for hours

[18:28]a day where they sit down and they have no thoughts in

[18:33]their mind this is how much strength they have now how does

[18:35]this help you in your daily life it helps you in many

[18:40]different ways but when it comes to emotions whenever something happens in

[18:44]my life I don't react immediately to it I'm not someone who's

[18:51]driven by my emotions I'm not someone who has no control over

[18:56]what they do in their life I decide when I get angry

[19:01]I decide if I want that thing to enter into my mind

[19:06]or not I decide whether I want it to influence me or

[19:09]not I gain control over these things so this is something that's

[19:14]very important for us to work on in order to gain that

[19:20]self-awareness and to gain that self- strength to overcome these challenges that

[19:25]we have in our life Muhammad muhamad today may God bless the

[19:36]brothers for uh giving me some coffee thought that would resolve the

[19:43]uh the uh jet lag issue it could we'll see so if

[19:47]it does then tomorrow night I'll Market the my Cafe over here

[19:53]on the member and give him credit for it muhamad Muhammad okay

[20:03]so the Quran has a lot of verses that talks about emotional

[20:09]intelligence now it doesn't mention that word specifically but it either gives

[20:14]us examples of the nature of the human being or it gives

[20:17]us stories to think about so when you're reading the Quran during

[20:21]this holy month try to look for these nuances try to look

[20:26]for these details if you read a verse see if there's any

[20:29]anything related to emotional intelligence in this verse or not I'm going

[20:33]to give a few examples for us to take and maybe apply

[20:37]and and help us understand one of the verses that is mentioned

[20:44]is in chapter 49:2 Allah subhana T says oh you who believe

[20:52]avoid much negative assumption indeed some assumption is sin and do not

[20:58]not spy or backbite each other don't spy on each other or

[21:04]backbite on each other now when we read about this we see

[21:10]that what the Quran is trying to tell us is that these

[21:12]things cause conflicts in life they show that our emotional maturity is

[21:18]low what it wants us to do is it wants us to

[21:24]develop emotional maturity and emotional maturity is something that develops and different

[21:28]stages and different levels I'll give you an example if you're someone

[21:34]who has anger issues and you want to change that you want

[21:37]to become someone who is not as angry and someone who's more

[21:41]emotionally mature if you talk with somebody who has a different opinion

[21:45]you immediately get into an argument someone who belongs to a different

[21:49]or supports a different basketball team or football team than what you

[21:53]support you get into an argument with each other and you start

[21:57]fighting with one another and yelling at each other and sometimes even

[22:01]cussing at each other it just shows that you don't have this

[22:04]high level of emotional maturity so what you want to do is

[22:08]you want to change that the first thing that you do is

[22:12]you begin suppressing that emotion that's the first level you want to

[22:17]gain control over the emotion I don't want to be angry this

[22:19]way you make the intention but before making the intention intellectually you're

[22:23]aware that this is a bad thing right then you make the

[22:26]intention then you begin pressing the emotion that you have okay next

[22:33]time something that bothers me I am not going to allow myself

[22:35]to get angry no matter how bad it is so something happens

[22:40]to you you're on the road somebody cuts you off and you

[22:43]want to release the anger but you decide you know what I

[22:47]want to become someone who's more in control of himself or herself

[22:50]I'm just going to let it go it's just a car it

[22:53]just passed by it has no effect on my life I'm not

[22:58]going to get angry over this but your boy from inside you're

[23:00]telling yourself this but in reality what you want to do is

[23:03]you want to grab your car and you want to ram the

[23:04]other car right you want to throw them off the road and

[23:08]if you can maybe beat them up and eliminate their existence that's

[23:11]your real feeling but now we're trying to change we're telling ourselves

[23:15]no I want to not do this I want to be a

[23:20]good human being and I want to just continue driving as if

[23:26]nothing happened this is called suppressing the emotion and it's a very

[23:30]difficult thing to do if you're someone who doesn't have control over

[23:33]his or her emotions it's very difficult it's very challenging especially if

[23:37]you are with that one friend who knows how to push your

[23:41]buttons and they don't stop there's that one person that you know

[23:48]they're annoying they do that one thing and they see the reaction

[23:51]from you and they get pleasure they derive their pleasure in life

[23:54]from this type of behavior just the irritation of other people that's

[24:00]how they survive some people live on oxygen and others live on

[24:03]irritating other people so if you have that one person in your

[24:05]life that is one of the biggest tests for you it's a

[24:09]bad thing at the same time it's a very good thing because

[24:14]it could act as a catalyst it could make you change yourself

[24:16]even faster than not having that person in your life so this

[24:19]person comes and irritates you you suppress that feeling they irritate you

[24:23]more you suppress it until they eventually hopefully give up but what's

[24:27]Happening Here is you're trapping that feeling inside of you and eventually

[24:34]is going to have to either decip itate or go out in

[24:38]some other Outlet the next level that you want to reach Which

[24:42]is higher than this level which is more advanced than this level

[24:45]is that you want to take that emotion and turn it into

[24:52]a good emotion this is a more mature level of emotional intelligence

[24:57]somebody whoat treats me in a bad way what I do is

[25:03]I decide I'm going to treat them in a good way so

[25:08]you do bad to me I'm going to do good to you

[25:09]this is also self-training and it also develops your emotional intelligence and

[25:17]emotional maturity now you're not suppressing the emotion you're not working only

[25:22]on controlling yourself from that rage and from exploding and becoming the

[25:27]Hulk no you're able to turn around and you have some room

[25:33]and space to treat that other person in a good way someone

[25:36]cuts you off you come and you reciprocate in a good way

[25:41]you say okay maybe that person has a busy day you give

[25:44]them an excuse someone who decides not to call you anymore you

[25:50]take the initiative and you call that individual someone in your family

[25:54]mistreats you instead of reacting by mistreating them and cutting them off

[25:57]you say you know what I'm going to be the better person

[26:01]I'm going to be the more mature individual you start developing this

[26:06]reaction in a better way and slowly what happens is that internally

[26:13]you stop reacting in a negative way when something bad happens in

[26:19]your life So eventually what you want to reach is if someone

[26:24]harms you you don't even have a negative reaction inside of you

[26:28]towards that indiv idual you have empathy you feel bad for that

[26:32]individual what has happened to them that allows them to behave in

[26:39]this manner and if we look at the lives of our imams

[26:41]and the prophet sallallah alai wasallam we see this very clearly exemplified

[26:45]IM husse inala I'm sure all of you have heard the story

[26:52]when the IM felt so bad for the enemies he was crying

[26:55]over them and when he was asked why are you crying over

[27:01]people who have come to kill you and he said that they're

[27:03]going to enter Hellfire because of killing me and this breaks my

[27:09]heart to see someone who's going to suffer from their own wrongdoing

[27:13]even though they're doing the wrong thing and they deserve it because

[27:16]they're doing the wrong thing the Imam still has that compassion and

[27:20]mercy in his heart that makes him feel pain for the suffering

[27:26]of other people this is a very very high level of emotional

[27:31]maturity and emotional intelligence that we hope to emulate and to follow

[27:35]in the path ofam in one of the um or multiple verses

[27:51]actually in the Quran Allah subhana tala tells the prophet that you

[28:01]have this extensive amount of empathy for other people to the point

[28:08]that you're going to kill yourself over them people who the prophet

[28:11]was calling to believe and they were rejecting the message the God

[28:16]tells the the prophet sallallahu alaihi wasallam don't kill yourself over these

[28:22]individuals the prophet was feeling so much pain and so much hurt

[28:25]that it was going to end his life because these individuals are

[28:31]not making the right decisions in their life to the point that

[28:33]even Allah subhah wa ta'ala told the prophet that even this is

[28:38]too much so there's an excessive amount of empathy at times that

[28:44]we have to control and there's an excessive amount of selfishness that

[28:49]we also have to control we have to look for a balance

[28:55]in our life and throughout the stories in the Quran that the

[28:59]proph Propet went through we understand that what God was trying to

[29:02]do with the prophets is he was trying to reach them or

[29:06]teach them how to reach that Middle Point to reach that balance

[29:10]in their life not to go to the extremes if we look

[29:16]at Prophet m a lot of his stories are mentioned in the

[29:19]Quran and we'll go into more detail about that tomorrow but one

[29:23]of the main features that the stories of Moses in the Quran

[29:30]is that about is fear the emotion of fear now if we

[29:35]look at emotions we can categorize them into three categories they can

[29:40]be positive they can be negative and they can be neutral every

[29:45]emotion can either be good bad or just natural neutral or natural

[29:50]mam went through a lot of things in his life he was

[29:58]with the pharaoh and then he broke off and he escaped from

[30:04]the pharaoh's Palace when he did he ended up seeing a person

[30:09]on the path that was one of his followers one of his

[30:12]friends he was in an argument with someone who was from the

[30:16]Pharaoh side Moses Alam came and helped his supporter ended up killing

[30:23]the guy that belonged to the Pharaoh that caused him a very

[30:30]big problem the Pharaoh found out and they sent like the police

[30:34]of that time to go and Chase Mam and to track him

[30:40]down and to take him in the Quran describes M Alam the

[30:43]next morning after killing that person that he left the city fearfully

[30:48]he had fear in his heart in another place in the Quran

[30:53]Allah subhana T says that the saints of God Allah those who

[31:00]are the companions of God do not have fear nor do they

[31:06]grief so here Allah subhana on the one hand says that if

[31:11]you reach this high level of spirituality you don't have fear but

[31:15]on the other hand he describes mam going through some form of

[31:24]emotions of fear in his life even when mam was spoken to

[31:26]by God he was walking with his family members and then he

[31:31]saw a tree and he saw fire so he said I'm going

[31:34]to see what's going on over there maybe they can guide us

[31:37]onto the path because we've lost track of the path and he

[31:43]goes there and God saids that he spoke to him and when

[31:48]he did mam had also experienced an emotion of fear as well

[31:52]and God told them do not fear because the messengers don't fear

[31:57]in my presence God was teaching him that you have this emotion

[32:01]but you have to understand that you have to overcome it you

[32:07]have to be able to remove it from your heart when it's

[32:11]not the right place for it when you're running away from the

[32:16]Pharaoh that fear is a natural fear you have to protect yourself

[32:22]and most of I mean a lot of us or all of

[32:25]us are here right now we're surviving because of the emotion of

[32:28]fear right but the fear of hurting yourself the fear of dying

[32:33]the fear of this the fear of that is what's making you

[32:37]survive so fear in one sense is a very good emotion to

[32:40]have on the other hand if you have excessive fear then you

[32:46]develop a form of anxiety you have too much fear unjustified fear

[32:50]and that's something that we have to overcome in our lives so

[32:54]that's a negative aspect of fear we have a positive aspect which

[32:58]is the one that allows us to protect ourselves allows us to

[33:01]survive allows us to protect our loved ones and not do crazy

[33:08]things and then we have a negative aspect which leads to anxiety

[33:11]leads to OCD leads to a lot of different spiritual and mental

[33:19]diseases in our lives so we have to find that balance when

[33:22]it comes to this emotion and other emotions as well and inshallah

[33:26]beginning with tomorrow or ending with tomorrow we'll choose a number of

[33:31]different emotions and we'll go through them and then we can open

[33:37]the floor uh for anybody who wants to contribute uh and share

[33:41]their thoughts and their ideas um so that we can all benefit

[33:44]inshallah and maybe have a reciprocal discussion

0 تعليقات

التالي

Ramadan Night 3 - Sheikh Abdulrahman Cherri

Transcript

التالي

استكشاف المزيد

يرجى ملاحظة أنه إذا كان عمرك أقل من 18 عامًا ، فلن تتمكن من الوصول إلى هذا الموقع.

التالي

Ramadan Night 3 - Sheikh Abdulrahman Cherri

Transcript

التالي

استكشاف المزيد

اختيار طريقة الدفع

لغة