Lessons from The Marriage of The Prophet & Sayeda Khadijah - Sayed Ahmed Al-Qazwini

48 المشاهدات· 24/03/25

Al-Rasoul Islamic Society
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Al-Rasoul Islamic Society || Halifax - Canada

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[0:11]respected brothers and sisters assalamu alaikum warahmatullahi she is the first woman

[0:31]to ever believe in rasulullah and she is one of the four

[0:38]greatest women of all time that allah ever created and when we

[0:42]examine the history and the legacy of assay we find many lessons

[0:48]that we can learn from her lessons of altruism and sacrifice for

[0:53]example because there is no one that sacrificed and gave like khadija

[0:58]alaihissalam gave to allah what she gave to rasulallah what you gave

[1:05]to islam cannot be matched by any other of the sahaba this

[1:07]is the legacy of a said khadijah when you look at the

[1:13]marriage of assad to rasulullah you find many lessons we can learn

[1:18]from her marriage because it was indeed an exemplary marriage that we

[1:22]should all try to emulate in our lives because when we speak

[1:29]about successful marriages we tend to always focus on the marriage of

[1:33]imam ali alaihissalam and fatima to zahra and of course there is

[1:38]no doubt that the marriage of imam ali and fatima to zahra

[1:41]is an outstanding an example for every single one of us when

[1:47]we want to seek inspiration in marriage but the question is to

[1:50]ask who raised fatima who did she learn from who raised it

[1:56]was khadijah that raised fatima and imam ali that was raised in

[2:02]the house of rasulallah thus when you see that the marriage of

[2:05]ali and fatima was successful there is no surprise because they followed

[2:10]in the footsteps of the marriage of khadijah and rasulullah as they

[2:14]say the apple doesn't fall far from the tree and that's why

[2:19]when we examine this beautiful marriage of khadija and rasulullah we find

[2:25]so many beautiful lessons that we can apply in our lives tonight

[2:31]i'd like to examine the marriage of prophet of rasulallah and then

[2:38]i would like to extract some lessons that we can derive that

[2:45]we can apply in our lives from their marriage how did she

[2:51]get to know rasulullah how did she meet him because back then

[2:54]obviously there was no facebook you would agree correct see many of

[3:00]our youth today they're turning to facebook they're turning to twitter they're

[3:02]turning to instagram they're turning to tick tock social media so that

[3:08]they can meet their spouse you ask many of the youth how

[3:10]did you get married how did you meet this youngly lovely youngly

[3:14]this lovely young lady they will tell you you know what there

[3:19]was a for example a post i saw on social media there

[3:21]was a like and then there was a message and then an

[3:25]interaction and then we got married but during the time of rasulullah

[3:28]there was no social media so how did khadijah and because likewise

[3:35]there was no social media it was also not an arranged marriage

[3:39]because many times we would imagine that in the earlier history it

[3:44]was all arranged marriages correct it was chosen for you to marry

[3:48]this person the marriage of khadija to rasulullah was very unique and

[3:52]that it was not arranged it was the choice of khadija alaihi

[3:56]hassalam that she wanted to marry rasulullah and it was his choice

[4:01]that he wanted to marry khadija without the parents without any of

[4:05]the family members intervening and them encouraging to get married so that's

[4:10]why it was a very beautiful and unique marriage how did khadijah

[4:15]know rasulullah as we know she's very wealthy the wealthiest woman in

[4:22]arabia it all began with a business venture that she had she

[4:26]was looking for a business partner she has the wealth she has

[4:31]a caravan of goods that's supposed to go to sham and do

[4:33]trait she needs a business partner and as you know anyone who's

[4:39]done business any time you look for a business partner it's not

[4:43]just someone that has the skills it has to be likewise someone

[4:48]that is what trustworthy you can trust them with your money with

[4:51]the business you can trust them with the work is looking for

[4:56]someone that is amin someone that is sad who is better in

[5:02]quraysh because he had the reputation of assad everyone knew him in

[5:11]quraish to be trustworthy to be honest to the extent that when

[5:15]someone in quraish wanted to travel they would entrust their money with

[5:19]rasulullah now we put our money in the banks back then there

[5:24]were no banks so when you want to go on a long

[5:28]travel maybe even with your family members you want to place your

[5:30]money with someone that you trust most people they would come to

[5:33]rasulullah because they knew he was assad i remember a story that

[5:40]one day happened between abu jahl and al-waleed these were one of

[5:46]the two fiercest enemies and the opposition of rasulallah were having a

[5:54]debate discussion on rasulullah is he truthful when he says i'm a

[5:58]messenger or is he lying abu jahl tells el walid he tells

[6:04]him i know wallahi that is honest he's not lying tells him

[6:09]how do you know this he says because ever since he was

[6:13]a child we used to call him since he was a child

[6:18]everyone knew he was honest trustworthy he had never lied in his

[6:21]life now that he's grown older and he's mature i come and

[6:25]i say that he is lying he's making up a lie every

[6:27]single day it doesn't make sense so why did abu jahl then

[6:33]reject rasulullah it was because of arrogance he said because i am

[6:36]from one tribe and muhammad is from another tribe and i will

[6:40]never submit to someone from another tribe it was the tribal mentality

[6:44]that prevented abu jahl from believing in muhammad or else he know

[6:48]that prophet muhammad was indeed the messenger of allah subhanahu wa so

[6:53]rasulullah was known in quraysh as assad the best reputation one day

[6:59]rasulullah had narrated one to buy a horse he bought the horse

[7:05]from an arabi so he saw the horse he liked it and

[7:08]he set a price the accepted the transaction was done the deal

[7:12]was finished rasulullah went to bring the money the arabi is just

[7:18]waiting to collect the money this is after rasool allah becomes the

[7:23]messenger so he's waiting some of the mun affirm the hypocrites they

[7:27]envied rasulullah so they went and they tried to break that transaction

[7:31]they went to him they told them muhammad has calmed you why

[7:37]because your horse is worth is worth much more let's say for

[7:40]example that the price was set at 50 dinars they told them

[7:46]your horse is worth 100 150.

[7:47]he says what do i do now they told him when he

[7:51]comes tell him that the price that we agreed on was not

[7:53]50 was 150.

[7:55]change it i'm giving an example so he said i just like

[8:00]they said yes lie to him tell him he will give you

[8:03]more so the holy prophet comes back with the money he gives

[8:05]him the money that he says this is not the price that

[8:08]we agreed on rasulullah says yes this is the price we agreed

[8:11]on he says no the prophet says yes he says no all

[8:16]of a sudden one of the companions of rasulullah comes by the

[8:20]name of jose ma eben jose ma ebin comes and he says

[8:27]ya rasulallah i testify i am a witness that the price that

[8:29]you are mentioning is right rasulullah tells them but you were not

[8:33]there when we did the transaction you never saw you never heard

[8:38]how are you witnessing to something you were not present look at

[8:43]his iman rasulullah he tells him ya muhammad i trust you with

[8:48]my faith with my akhira i believed you when you told me

[8:50]there is a god i believed you when you told me there

[8:55]is jannah there is nar you don't want me to believe you

[8:56]about a horse the price of a horse of course i believe

[9:00]you because you are assad you never lie about anything this is

[9:04]when rasulullah has reported he says meaning that he is one person

[9:13]but his testimony equals the testimony of two people that's why any

[9:17]time you have a quarrel you need witnesses usually two if he

[9:20]comes in witnesses he suffices for two he's one person whose testimony

[9:24]equals two individuals so this story highlights that rasulullah had a beautiful

[9:32]reputation in quraysh he was known as assad knows that muhammad is

[9:40]honest muhammad is trustworthy and i can trust him with this business

[9:45]venture so that's why she sends a request to the prophet i

[9:48]want you to be a business partner i have the money the

[9:53]caravan of goods you go to sham and you do business rasulullah

[9:57]needed money because he was not wealthy so he accepted khadijah still

[10:03]has never met muhammad she's only interacted with him through people other

[10:09]individuals the holy prophet then sets out with the caravan to sham

[10:13]khadija sends one of her servants by the name of mesara she

[10:18]tells him go with muhammad on this trip and he wasn't there

[10:22]just to help him in the business deal the point of why

[10:27]she sent me sarah was that so she monitors muhammad so that

[10:32]he monitors muhammad he assesses him as he really as they speak

[10:37]because sometimes there are people who have a good reputation but when

[10:39]you come and you see them you see they're not as good

[10:45]as people speak right exaggerations other times no you find that these

[10:49]people are what are under appreciated people do not appreciate this person

[10:53]as they should so she sends me sarah and he is supposed

[10:59]to evaluate and assess the character of rasulullah because is likewise what

[11:05]searching for a husband just like many of our youth they're searching

[11:09]for husbands they're searching for wives wants to get married she is

[11:17]between the age of 25 to 28 anywhere between this and many

[11:20]people had come and proposed to her abu jahl proposed to her

[11:26]abu sufyan proposed to her but yet no hadith the right person

[11:30]so rasulullah goes with masara and they come back after they come

[11:37]back mesara goes and reports to khadijah and he tells her ya

[11:41]khadija i saw wonders from this man muhammad he is truly a

[11:43]treasure he's a gem in his discipline and his and his respect

[11:50]and his integrity and his honesty indeed he is assad is an

[11:58]angel he is a saint so he gives this news to khadijah

[12:04]and khadija starts to feel that what this is the right person

[12:06]for me to what to get married to because now not only

[12:12]the reputation now i have tried him and he has proven to

[12:15]be a noble individual many lessons to be learned from this brothers

[12:19]and sisters lesson number one that we learn from khadija when it

[12:26]comes to searching for our spouses is that you have to number

[12:31]one look amongst a family where they have a noble reputation when

[12:34]you want to find a spouse whether a boy a girl i'm

[12:38]looking for a son-in-law i'm looking for a daughter-in-law i'm a young

[12:41]guy i'm searching for a girl i'm a young girl i'm searching

[12:45]for a guy search for someone that has good reputation in the

[12:49]community sometimes you go to some communities you hear everyone talking against

[12:53]the family now yes sometimes it could be wrong it could be

[12:56]volume against that family but at the end of the day don't

[13:01]search in areas where there is no good reputation search amongst people

[13:04]that have a good reputation this is the first lesson that khadijah

[13:09]tells us when you're searching for your soul mate make sure this

[13:15]person comes from what a noble family why because they tell us

[13:19]that we are told that genes are inherited correct if you have

[13:24]a family that what that they are generous most likely their kids

[13:29]will be generous and that's why you see the famous poem was

[13:38]generous and his son adi or oday was generous the poet says

[13:43]i'm not surprised to see the son of hatamata a generous because

[13:46]he took after his father now it's proven that these genes we

[13:51]pass them on imam ali alayhi when he wants a brave son

[13:54]what does he tell his brother he tells his brother i want

[13:58]you to search a wife that comes from a brave family why

[14:03]because a brave family will breed will give birth to a brave

[14:06]son and that's how al abbas alayhi salaam came to this dunya

[14:10]and subhanallah i was reading that now scientists are discovering even intelligence

[14:16]intelligence is passed through genes correct you find someone intelligent they say

[14:22]up to 50 percent of your intelligence can be taken from your

[14:26]father and especially from your mother so that's why you look in

[14:32]noble families because these good traits are what are passed down and

[14:36]likewise bad traits unfortunately they are also passed down this is number

[14:41]one number two reputation by itself is not enough do not rely

[14:46]solely on reputation khadijah teaches us muhammad was assad i mean the

[14:50]reputation was there but did she say that's enough no khadija she

[14:57]what she investigated and that's why the second point that we have

[15:01]to keep in mind when we are soul searching is what reputation

[15:04]check number two do some investigations why because many times as i

[15:10]said there are people who have good reputations in the public but

[15:14]unfortunately privately they have a different face correct privately you find something

[15:19]else and that's why you have to investigate just because the father

[15:23]and the mother are good does not always mean the children the

[15:26]son and the daughter will be good you have to investigate how

[15:30]do i investigate before it may be a little difficult you have

[15:34]to ask here and there now the easiest way for you to

[15:39]investigate a prospect a young man or a young woman is how

[15:41]go and check their social media accounts subhanallah they put everything on

[15:47]it they put everything on it sometimes even some things where they

[15:52]are exposing themselves allah has but because of social media you find

[15:55]young people they're exposing themselves i see some young people when i

[16:00]travel to majalis and then when i go on their social media

[16:05]accounts i see look at the accounts they're following of female singers

[16:10]inappropriate accounts the pictures that they are liking the pictures that they

[16:14]are putting the content the words that they are put the profanity

[16:17]and it's all public on facebook on instagram on snapchat no one

[16:23]is exposing them they are revealing themselves and that's why i have

[16:27]read that some companies when you apply to them correct you want

[16:31]a job what do they do in order to assess your personality

[16:33]they don't just ask you what do they do they go and

[16:38]check your facebook they go and check your social media accounts to

[16:41]see are you someone who behaves are you someone who is responsible

[16:44]or not so one of the best ways that you can investigate

[16:49]and see if this person is as they claim is through their

[16:55]what through their social media accounts some people as soon as they

[16:58]have some fathers they have someone that comes to propose to their

[17:00]daughter the first thing they do they call the local sheikh say

[17:06]it please do an estihada for me without doing any investigation without

[17:10]asking without knowing anything right away here is after you investigate after

[17:19]you ask go and check their accounts ask other people and then

[17:23]you still don't know you do here but from day one someone

[17:27]comes and proposes i do without knowing anything without investigating anything this

[17:30]is wrong brothers and sisters we have to make it a habit

[17:36]to investigate this is number two and number three the third and

[17:38]best way to know if this person is genuine or not is

[17:44]how is to test them and this is not always possible but

[17:50]if you test someone then you can find out the true colors

[17:53]of that person correct you see hadith just rely on the reputation

[18:00]she didn't just rely on on asking she tested muhammad and one

[18:03]of the best ways to test the person is how and imam

[18:07]hassan was asked how do i know if someone is genuine he's

[18:11]a true friend or i can you know you can also apply

[18:15]it to marriage uh test that person with money test that person

[18:22]with money and man then you know that this person is genuine

[18:28]because subhanallah how money sometimes reveals our true colors money reveals our

[18:34]true colors you give someone you want to test them give them

[18:37]some money right and then a couple of months later a month

[18:41]ask them to give you the money back will they give the

[18:43]money back or not you know how many people they come and

[18:47]tell me say it i gave a loan to someone who used

[18:52]to come to the mosque he asked me for a five thousand

[18:54]dollar loan a ten thousand dollar no he used to pray in

[18:58]the first line for suffer masha allah the beard the sabha is

[19:03]in his hand and he's wearing 17 rings on his fingers so

[19:06]i what i assume this is a movement trustworthy so he asked

[19:10]me one day for help i give him i give him ten

[19:15]thousand dollars and then when it's time to repay it i call

[19:19]him he blocks me he blocks me he does not reply is

[19:21]this person a true man brothers and sisters this is not a

[19:25]true moment and that's why the imams of ahlulbay tell us do

[19:27]not be fooled by appearances maybe someone comes and prays every jummah

[19:32]maybe someone comes to every lecture is this an indicator that he's

[19:37]a i mean no how do you know he's a true woman

[19:41]test him with money if you can entrust him or her with

[19:43]your money with your family with your kids this is when you

[19:47]know this person is a movement that's why there's a hadith from

[19:51]rasulullah where he says so what if he prays don't say masha

[20:04]allah he is fasting all of month of rajab and shabbat this

[20:09]is not a definitive indicator i'm not trying to say these are

[20:12]not good deeds these are good deeds these are usually deeds that

[20:15]believers do but is this a definitive indicator that this person is

[20:21]a believer rasool allah says no do not look at his hajj

[20:25]his fasting even if he prays is this an indicator that this

[20:32]person is someone you can trust this is a moment no the

[20:35]prophet says two indicators you know if this person is genuine you

[20:43]know if this is a person you can trust your daughter's life

[20:48]with you know this person is worthy of giving your daughter to

[20:51]or not he says hadith if he is honest he does not

[20:54]lie and number two if he is trustworthy if you cannot trust

[20:59]someone with your money you can trust them with your daughter so

[21:03]one way to know if this person is genuine or not is

[21:09]how is through money test them through money yes maybe even if

[21:12]it's a test tell them you know what this is a loan

[21:16]a thousand five thousand a ten thousand ask you know i we

[21:18]may joke about this ask about their credit score maybe this is

[21:22]a good idea some people fraud their entire history is fraud they

[21:25]fraud they defraud the the banks they defraud the insurance they defraud

[21:30]the government he's working what's under the table taking cash and he's

[21:34]taking welfare and he's taking from his country in the middle east

[21:38]also he's taking some money can you trust this person wallahi i

[21:41]would not trust this person with my daughter i don't care how

[21:45]much salah he prays let him read the quran every single day

[21:49]best when he has no ammana when you cannot trust him with

[21:54]money it's all fraud fraud fraud i would not treat this person

[21:56]so test brothers and sisters your prospect test the girl test the

[22:02]guy this is one way salaam teaches us khadijah teaches us tests

[22:06]the person and khadijah subhanallah she tested rasulullah with money she did

[22:12]not take it for granted that he has a reputation of being

[22:16]assad i mean remember this is before he's a messenger rasulullah is

[22:18]25 years old this is 15 years before jibril comes down rasulullah

[22:22]had good reputation did she just rely on that no did she

[22:27]say well he had a good father he has a good uncle

[22:30]no no she tested him and she tested him with money and

[22:34]this is when she found out that rasulullah has a true gem

[22:36]this is a lesson for you and i so number one the

[22:39]first way you test someone to know if this is a good

[22:40]person to marry to marry either i am the girl or i

[22:44]am the father i want to accept this son-in-law as the husband

[22:48]of my daughter is truman number two the second way you can

[22:51]test the true nature of someone is what is through traveling with

[22:58]them travel with that person when you travel with someone that trip

[23:02]even if it's two three days will show will show the true

[23:04]colors of that person it will show the true colors of that

[23:08]person because many times brothers and sisters you find our youth they're

[23:12]getting into marriages they think this is a good person a good

[23:17]guy a good girl but after that they realize that they have

[23:20]been fooled they have been deceived why because we human beings are

[23:26]smart actors when we know we're being looked at when we we

[23:29]are being judged and evaluated i know the father-in-law is looking at

[23:33]me i sought like this masha allah when the girl is looking

[23:36]at me i become correct and the girl she becomes masha allah

[23:42]bintu she becomes an angel why because we are being looked at

[23:45]this is human nature and it's not just with marriage you know

[23:48]this is one of the tendencies the bad tendencies of human beings

[23:54]is that we do anytime we know people are looking at us

[23:57]we love to do riya there's even a funny story about this

[24:00]they say one day a young man came to the masjid he

[24:04]wanted to pray there's no one there so he's praying you know

[24:06]when we pray privately how fast we pray people i see those

[24:12]allah is like this to them takes three minutes the whole should

[24:16]take 10 minutes correct it takes because they read so fast but

[24:22]when someone is looking all of a sudden they become abdul basut

[24:26]so this young man he he comes he's praying fast all the

[24:30]sudden two older men they come they come so he knows there's

[24:35]people behind him so he starts to slow down he starts to

[24:39]read tajweed bismillah [Music] you want to say allah after that so

[24:50]he starts to read quran in the most beautiful way he's slowly

[24:53]reading so he catches the attention of those two individuals they say

[24:58]masha allah masha allah look at this job look at this job

[25:00]he's such a man his tajweed his so beautiful is so beautiful

[25:06]one tells the other i wish my son i wish my daughter

[25:10]would learn from this individual and you can imagine the smile on

[25:12]his face they can't see his smile he's so happy that he's

[25:14]being praised for acting for acting subhanallah this is how happy he

[25:21]is so they praise him and praise him and he's losing patience

[25:23]he's about to explode how happy is they say in the middle

[25:27]of the salah he broke a salah he told them don't forget

[25:29]that i'm fasting also i'm fasting so sometimes when we know people

[25:35]are looking at us we become actors so you may find the

[25:37]guy says i went out with her on a date two days

[25:41]five dates because i never saw this now that i got married

[25:43]i'm seeing another face i am for example discovering alarming things i

[25:47]never knew about or i am seeing discovering certain traits that were

[25:53]not there when i was on those dates when i used to

[25:55]go to the family their family used to come in our house

[25:58]where did this come from the problem is because we don't test

[26:00]how do you test someone we said through amana and number two

[26:03]through trips travel with that person i as a father-in-law i want

[26:08]to see if this person is a gem travel with him as

[26:11]if you and if you can afford it tell him i will

[26:12]pay for your expenses let's go to hajj together let's go to

[26:16]ziyara together let's go asan anywhere let's go to hawaii let's go

[26:21]to anywhere you want to go three four days and just monitor

[26:23]him exactly like how may sarah was monitoring rasulullah because when you

[26:32]travel you truly you truly find out the identity of people their

[26:36]true colors sometimes when i travel i realize some people are gems

[26:40]i never knew this i never knew this i go to hajj

[26:44]some years and there are many people i find out some people

[26:45]you know they they live with me for example in the city

[26:49]but i don't see them so much when i go to hajj

[26:50]because every day i am with them i realize that they are

[26:54]a gem and sometimes the opposite sometimes we realize that some people

[26:58]who had a good reputation home when you go to hajj with

[27:00]them you see this person is all false no this person is

[27:05]a terrible individual so one of the benefits of traveling with someone

[27:08]is that you can know and discover their true identity that's why

[27:15]there is a beautiful poem that is attributed to him about traveling

[27:21]imam speaks about this the imam has been attributed to him he

[27:24]says so beautiful and eloquent he says he says that travel he

[27:42]encourages traveling why he says because there are five benefits when you

[27:46]travel he says tafar johamen he says because when you travel number

[27:55]one sometimes what this is relief from the stress of home and

[28:00]work so go out and have fun you know go to a

[28:04]vacation as long as it is what this is a form of

[28:10]relief a stress reliever and then he says likewise you find that

[28:13]when you travel sometimes you can make money you can make your

[28:17]living sometimes in the business trips and then the imam says when

[28:20]you travel sometimes you will gain knowledge sometimes you will be exposed

[28:24]to other cultures which is also good it makes you more what's

[28:26]humble it makes you more accepting and tolerant of other cultures and

[28:34]finally the imam says sometimes some individuals you discover them when you

[28:39]what when you travel with them you discover that they are gems

[28:43]20 years in my city i never had such a good friend

[28:44]i travel one trip i go to toronto i go to vancouver

[28:48]i go to for example umrah i go to kerbal i go

[28:52]to najaf in that trip i realize that this person is a

[28:54]gem that's why when i travel sometimes i see some friends they

[28:58]live in the same city they tell me say do you know

[29:00]how we became best buddies we live in the same city it's

[29:02]not here we went to azeala trip we went to hajj and

[29:07]this is when we discovered each other so when you travel this

[29:09]is when you discover the true nature of people so the imam

[29:16]says majid how do you know someone is maajid someone is truly

[29:18]noble it's when you travel the imam could also mean that sometimes

[29:21]when you're looking for a spouse you don't have to stick to

[29:26]your city correct he says safar there are benefits of to traveling

[29:30]that sometimes you can find your spouse when you travel correct doesn't

[29:33]have to be in the city go one week 10 days spend

[29:37]in a community that there are muslims and maybe you can search

[29:39]amongst there i remember a couple of years ago there was a

[29:43]brother who was trying to get married for years he couldn't get

[29:47]married finally one day he says alhamdulillah i have found the girl

[29:50]of my dreams and i want to marry her how did you

[29:53]get to know her this is not a joke this is real

[29:56]he says through social media through the internet i got to know

[29:58]her best alhamdulillah for months we have been interacting and i have

[30:02]asked her to so many questions we became friends and i know

[30:06]that she is the one that is right for me i say

[30:08]alhamdulillah this young man is fairly wealthy this young man is fairly

[30:16]wealthy so he tells me that i am going to dubai for

[30:18]my honeymoon and then he sends me a message he tells me

[30:22]say it a couple of days after my honeymoon in dubai i

[30:25]want to set up a zoom call with you i want you

[30:29]to give us some advice me and my wife i want you

[30:32]to give us some advice for newlyweds and i told them no

[30:34]problem inshaallah so we set an appointment let's say saturday 12 p.m

[30:39]we're supposed to meet and i give them some advice for newlyweds

[30:44]friday night he sends me a message he tells me say it

[30:48]i'm sorry the meeting is cancelled why i'll explain later okay i

[30:51]didn't say anything months later he calls me one day and he

[30:58]says say it do you know anyone that i can marry tell

[31:00]him didn't you just come back from your honeymoon in dubai he

[31:04]says say it i did go to the honeymoon in dubai but

[31:08]i left my wife in dubai why he says because my honeymoon

[31:12]is where i divorced her i told him why he said because

[31:16]i realized that she's a gold digger you know what a gold

[31:20]digger means ask your children someone that what just looks for money

[31:23]she saw pictures or he told her of his car he has

[31:27]a very nice porsche car correct and that he is wealthy and

[31:32]he makes this much and she was the best actor and pretending

[31:34]that she loved him he says when i traveled and i went

[31:38]to dubai i realized that she doesn't love me her love is

[31:41]not genuine this is a gold digger so that's why the honeymoon

[31:45]ended and what ended in divorce when you travel with someone no

[31:48]matter how many times you have met that person when you travel

[31:50]this is when you see the true colors and that's why they

[31:55]say someone was about to have his 10th anniversary of his marriage

[32:00]so someone comes and asks him he tells him you know what

[32:04]what's the recipe of of your success in your marriage because we

[32:09]never find you fighting with your wife you're never all of us

[32:12]we come back we're stressed from our wives and this and that

[32:16]and we have problems vasente you never have any problem what's the

[32:18]what's the what's the key teach us what do you do so

[32:21]he said you know what i travel i take my wife and

[32:24]i travel with her they said tell us examples he said yes

[32:28]it all began with the honeymoon for the honeymoon i took my

[32:32]wife to the maldives maldives masha allah he says yes so i

[32:35]always travel so they told them your 10th anniversary well where will

[32:40]you go he said i'll go back to the maldives why belgium

[32:42]once again he said so that i can go and bring her

[32:45]back from the mountains meaning he had left her from the honeymoon

[32:48]so some of our youth brothers and sisters from day one you

[32:53]start youth it starts very rocky correct why because it's all acting

[32:57]before that and this is when they re and this is when

[33:01]they realize the true personality of that person so the imam says

[33:04]you want to discover the personality of someone sohbato majid this can

[33:09]happen through traveling so this is the first lesson we learned from

[33:13]say that with respect to marriage number one look for the reputation

[33:18]number two investigate not just and number three if you can even

[33:23]test that person through money and through traveling so now that muhammad

[33:29]is back khadija knows that this person is right for her she

[33:32]starts to fall in love with him after everything she had heard

[33:37]about him some reports indicate that she had a friend by the

[33:41]name of nafisa nafisa bint omaya or bint moniya two names have

[33:45]been mentioned she tells her friend nafisa to go to muhammad and

[33:50]tell him that i'm interested in him but indirectly nafisa goes to

[33:55]muhammad after the trip yaya muhammad you're 25 years old you're not

[33:57]married why do you not get married he says who should i

[34:02]get married to she tells him if i suggest the name of

[34:06]someone who has beauty nobility and she has what and she has

[34:13]wealth everything you can imagine a woman will you accept he says

[34:15]of course who she tells him he says khadijah khadijah and the

[34:23]millionaires and the big dignitaries of quraish were being rejected so rasulullah

[34:28]told her khadijah will accept me she said yes khadija has sent

[34:31]me khadija has shown interest in you ya muhammad so come and

[34:37]propose to her if you accept look at the lesson that khadijah

[34:41]teaches us brothers and sisters this is the second lesson in our

[34:44]cultures it's always the man has to come and show interest to

[34:48]the girl correct the girl has to sit like a princess and

[34:52]wait for the khattaba as we say to come and show interest

[34:56]such that in our community sometimes it is even ib it is

[34:59]shameful for the woman for the girl to show interest is it

[35:05]isn't it in our culture like this if the girl comes to

[35:08]her father and she says you know there's a young man they

[35:09]say he's a man i'm interested he might slap her in her

[35:15]face this is haram but look she's the one that's initiated many

[35:19]fathers they think that if they initiate they go and tell some

[35:24]young man you don't have to make it very obvious indirectly send

[35:26]someone that this is what that this means my daughter is unworthy

[35:30]correct if i want to respect my daughter and she is azizah

[35:36]raleigh femina as we say then people have to come and show

[35:38]interest i cannot go and show interest this is all against the

[35:41]teachings of bait where do we learn this from brothers and sisters

[35:46]khadijah shows that even a woman she can go if she sees

[35:48]someone noble men honest worthy of marriage she can go and show

[35:54]the interest there's nothing wrong with that it is not i but

[36:00]subhan allah do we follow or do we follow our own customs

[36:06]subhanallah and that's why when you go to the arabic countries the

[36:10]muslim countries you will find so many girls that become honest honest

[36:14]is when she reaches the age but she can't get married she's

[36:19]30 35 why because she cannot show interest in anyone and they

[36:23]have to come sometimes people don't come hunter go what's the problem

[36:26]you the father go you the brother go you the uncle you

[36:30]see someone who's a moment and you can tell him look you

[36:34]can come and propose what's wrong with that is that shameful never

[36:37]this is the second lesson that khadija alaihi hassalam i as a

[36:41]father i have a daughter i don't have to wait for people

[36:44]to come like a king i'm a king i'm a prince my

[36:48]daughter is a princess no no you can go if you find

[36:49]someone good because many times you'll see some people who are gems

[36:54]you know they are gems but what they may not come because

[36:55]maybe they are afraid that if they come and they propose to

[37:00]my daughter i will reject so maybe he's interested but he's shy

[37:02]to come so you go out and you tell him what's the

[37:04]problem so this is when rasulullah he decides to come to propose

[37:12]to khadijah rasulullah comes with whom the hadith of imam sadiq explains

[37:16]it this is mentioned in the book of al-qafi al-imam sadiq is

[37:19]narrated saying the holy prophet goes to his uncle abu talib he

[37:24]goes to his uncle abu talib that khadijah has shown interest khadijah

[37:29]is a noble woman everyone would die to marry khadija abu talib

[37:34]sees it's a beautiful idea he says yes my dear nephew this

[37:36]is a good idea so abu talib excuse me abu talib comes

[37:43]with rasulullah some of the family members of rasulullah some of benihashin

[37:47]and some of the people of quraish so it was an entire

[37:51]delegation that came to the house of khadija some reports indicate it

[37:54]was her uncle other her cousin but most likely it was her

[37:57]uncle because her father had already died so they come to the

[38:03]house of khadija khadijah he represents the father of rasulullah so they

[38:09]come and they sit down al-imam tells us begins by glorifying allah

[38:17]and this is 15 years before islam begins abu talib begins his

[38:21]beautiful khutba that all muslims narrate you will find it for example

[38:24]ebene jose narrates in his book you will find muhammad tabari narrates

[38:29]in his book and you'll find the book of al al-qaeda narrates

[38:34]it also he begins by glorifying allah he says he says i

[38:47]praise allah azzawajal the lord of the kaaba who has made us

[38:51]bani hashem the children of ibrahim and the children of isma'il so

[38:55]he begins by glorifying allah and i thank allah i praise him

[39:03]for making our city mecca a holy city i thank allah subhanahu

[39:09]ta'ala for this this khutba in itself brothers and sisters proves that

[39:13]abu talib was never a mushrik you know why this is 15

[39:19]years before islam because if imagine abu talib was a mushrik and

[39:24]he believed in those idols why didn't he invoke the name of

[39:27]those idols you are doing a marriage you want the gods to

[39:33]bless this marriage and muhammad is not a messenger yet so you

[39:35]could say for example muhammad has said no i only believe in

[39:38]allah muhammad still not a messenger he's still not sent by allah

[39:40]so why didn't he not begin with the name of allah and

[39:45]then why didn't he not invoke their names and ask for their

[39:53]blessings because he was a moahed from day one even before islam

[39:56]came and this khutba in itself proves that abu talib was a

[40:03]muhat so the first thing that abu talib says he praises allah

[40:06]subhanahu wa ta'ala and then abu talib he begins to speak about

[40:10]rasulullah his nephew he says and this nephew of mine muhammad there

[40:16]is no one in quraysh greater than him you cannot compare anyone

[40:22]to my nephew muhammad yes maybe he does not have money maybe

[40:29]he is not wealthy but money comes and goes money comes and

[40:32]goes but what muhammad does have is something greater than money and

[40:37]that is his character his nobility his akhlaq you find his personality

[40:43]it is unmatched this is lesson three for us brothers and sisters

[40:47]from the marriage of rasulullah and khadija abu talib is telling us

[40:53]a message that what many people when they want to get married

[40:56]they look in the son-in-law money money money correct abu talib says

[41:01]money comes and goes if he's not rich today he can be

[41:05]rich tomorrow i know many couples now they're married when they started

[41:08]they were not wealthy they were very average now masha allah they're

[41:12]millionaires the husband is a millionaire and i know the opposite i

[41:16]know couples that got married they were very well off now they

[41:20]live off the welfare so don't just look at the money it's

[41:23]just the money money rasulullah says about rasulullah maybe you see him

[41:28]now he doesn't have money but money comes and goes what he

[41:33]does have is if it's there it will stay money comes and

[41:36]goes but if it's there it will not go and if it's

[41:38]not there it will never come brothers and sisters so ask for

[41:44]something look for something that is permanent that you can guarantee and

[41:47]rely on and that is the muhammad is what someone that has

[41:52]akhlaq and he will have the rest of his life and this

[41:55]is something that where we like brothers and sisters a brother tells

[42:00]me once that i go to propose i go to the family

[42:01]and i propose from the father he says the father only had

[42:07]two questions number one how much money do i make my career

[42:09]and number two subhanallah which village do i come from before it

[42:13]used to be which country but because both of them are from

[42:18]the same country which village do you come from he says he

[42:21]did not ask me about my dean about my salah do i

[42:25]drink do i not drink do i pay my humus not pay

[42:29]my zakat he did not even care about my do i have

[42:32]anger issues do i have depression money and which village and this

[42:38]is a mentality that many of us muslims have brothers and sisters

[42:42]unfortunately that money comes and goes money may not always bring happiness

[42:48]money is good we're not saying money is not important career is

[42:51]not important but don't just look at the career sometimes you see

[42:56]he comes with a poor scholars yes automatic yes ask about ask

[42:58]about his deen that's why rasulullah said if someone comes and you

[43:07]know their deen is good their religion and their personality their character

[43:11]is good this is when you say okay so you want to

[43:15]ask about the career you have the right to do that of

[43:16]course i don't want to marry my daughter to a homeless man

[43:20]but ask about his deen many fathers many mothers they don't care

[43:23]about the deen they don't care about the it's just the money

[43:27]this will not bring you happiness brothers and sisters there's a islam

[43:32]who told me the story he says that a girl comes one

[43:35]day and she tells me say it i want an appointment he

[43:37]says i know she's a very noble girl good girl in the

[43:43]community very good family i asked who is it she wants an

[43:45]appointment for the ketzmakta she says it is fulan he says i

[43:52]know fulan fulan is not a good person his family is not

[43:54]that good and he himself i have heard a lot of bad

[43:59]things about so i told her my dear daughter i think there

[44:03]are better people i think there are better people maybe this is

[44:06]not a good idea and you know this is one of those

[44:10]exceptions where you are allowed to do reba if someone asks you

[44:12]about someone then you're allah even if you're not asked you're just

[44:15]told this person is you're allowed to go and say this is

[44:19]not a good person you don't have to give details but at

[44:23]least what you show that person that this is probably not the

[44:25]best person for you even though that this is exposing but because

[44:27]you are doing it to save the marriage then you're allowed to

[44:32]do it so he says this islam i told her this is

[44:34]not the right person but she said no i am in love

[44:38]with him i want to marry her the alam says i know

[44:43]why because he drives a porsche he's wealthy very wealthy he's very

[44:47]handsome and charming masha'allah he comes and he charms you with his

[44:50]talk and a speech but i know there is no deen and

[44:55]noah i told her my dear daughter think about it again are

[44:57]you sure this is the right person no no no i want

[45:00]to marry and sometimes subhanallah you know when you fall in love

[45:03]these young people khalasbat no matter what you tell them it enters

[45:06]one ear and it comes out the other ear that's why there's

[45:11]a famous arabic expression and especially when you are someone that is

[45:16]in love wanna the poet says that when you fall in love

[45:22]with someone that's it you don't see any more you become blinded

[45:25]by the love and this is an even an expression in english

[45:27]that love blinds he says that she kept on insisting i said

[45:31]fine but i did what i have to do i gave her

[45:34]the warning she did not heed to the warning i did the

[45:37]viktob they had the the wedding he says two months later two

[45:42]months later she calls me crying say it what is it come

[45:46]and see what my husband what i just discovered what happened he

[45:50]got into an accident alhamdulillah no i don't know if she said

[45:54]alhamdulillah maybe she said unfortunately he did not die but i was

[45:59]called to the scene because i'm the wife and i see he

[46:04]is what arrested because he is drunk and driving so i realized

[46:08]that he's drinking and that's not where it stops so i took

[46:13]his phone and i realized that he has affairs with three other

[46:17]girls three other girls on the same day i realized that he

[46:21]drinks and what he's pulled over and arrested for drinking and driving

[46:25]i realize he has three affairs at once ya what should i

[46:30]do he says i told you so but you were so you

[46:34]were so stubborn you didn't want to listen didn't i tell you

[46:38]well if that if that man has millions of dollars what will

[46:42]his money do if he comes at night and he's drunk he

[46:46]does not fear allah subhanahu wa he comes and he abuses the

[46:50]daughter he has affairs with other women what will that help what

[46:53]will that money help my daughter if he has all that money

[46:55]nothing brothers and sisters and that's why there's a hadith from the

[47:01]prophet where he says he's narrated saying if you know that he

[47:08]drinks the son-in-law and you still accept because he has a nice

[47:11]house because he has the fancy car then it's as if you

[47:14]have severed your relationship with your daughter as if you have sold

[47:18]your daughter as if you have disowned your daughter so look for

[47:21]the iman brothers and sisters look for the this is a lesson

[47:25]the abu talib teaches us and there is also subhanallah we talk

[47:30]about religion there's also a study that i read emory university google

[47:35]it you can google it emory university of atlanta they did a

[47:39]study they found out that a woman who cared about the wealth

[47:41]of their husband they were they had a 60 percent higher chance

[47:46]of getting into a divorce versus the woman who did not care

[47:49]about the wealth it was about the akhlat it was about the

[47:53]personality so islam says it the quran says that the prophet says

[47:56]this albeit says and now scientists are discovering it so the second

[48:00]thing abu talib shows is that muhammad may not have money but

[48:05]he has a and this is what you should seek and then

[48:06]abu talib says i will pay the mahar do not worry about

[48:09]the mahara i will pay it so then al-imam sadaq says in

[48:14]the hadith the uncle or whoever it may have been representing khadijah

[48:17]when he was supposed to reply because of the eloquence and the

[48:21]aura the hebrew of abu talib and rasulullah he could not talk

[48:24]he started to stutter and tremble he started to tremble and stutter

[48:32]so khadija she came and she told her uncle my dear uncle

[48:34]please allow me to speak i have accepted i accept that muhammad

[48:40]is my husband and i tell you about alib there is no

[48:42]need for the dowry whatever you set at the at the dowry

[48:46]as the dowry i will take care of it so basically i

[48:47]will forfeit it this is another lesson that we learn if you

[48:52]see a young man that may not have so much he has

[48:55]the do not make the dowry and as an obstacle we hear

[48:57]this many many times brothers and sisters from the hadith of adul

[49:01]but practically unfortunately we do not apply it that's why the hadith

[49:05]of rasulallah says the best women of my nation are the ones

[49:10]that request the least amount of mahara she says i'll take care

[49:17]of the mahar don't worry about tamar why because i have found

[49:20]someone who is a jewel who is a gem who cares about

[49:24]tamaha when you have rasulullah himself is the treasure you look for

[49:27]money you think money will bring you the happiness this is where

[49:32]the hadith of the imam says some of the people of quraish

[49:36]were attending they became envious that muhammad now he's going to be

[49:40]the husband of khadija the wealthy and he doesn't even have to

[49:43]pay mahar so they say wow now the woman have to pay

[49:46]my heart huh from now on women have to pay mahar so

[49:49]they're mocking rasulullah this is when abu talib is angry and he

[49:54]says if it was a man like my nephew [Music] if it

[50:05]is a man like muhammad like muhammad yes he is to be

[50:09]paid he is not the one that pays meaning don't make money

[50:12]an obstacle it doesn't matter even if he gives you nothing as

[50:18]a mahara his akhlaq is more than you can ask for and

[50:21]if he has no but he gives you millions you still have

[50:24]not gained anything brothers and sisters we have to change our perspective

[50:28]abu talib says muhammad has something greater than money so if it

[50:33]is someone like my nephew muhammad who has then of course woman

[50:36]were to pay him but if it is imbeciles like you as

[50:40]we say like you he was telling those quraish the people of

[50:43]quraysh who were who were objecting if it is people imbeciles like

[50:46]you then you pay the highest mahara and yet women would say

[50:51]no so we cannot generalize it depends on the person this is

[50:54]a lesson that we learn brothers and sisters if a young man

[50:56]comes he has deen he has akhlaq he's trying to get a

[51:00]career he is studying he is working don't make the maharan obstacle

[51:02]you want to write it something fine but like abu talib said

[51:06]i will take care of the maha hadija says i take care

[51:08]of them what's the problem if the father-in-law takes care of them

[51:11]this is not once again this is from jahaliyah rasulullah they're teaching

[51:18]us this is not there is nothing wrong with this and this

[51:22]is where you find this beautiful matrimony between khadijah and rasulullah begins

[51:29]and they had the most beautiful marriage the most beautiful relationship that

[51:35]every single one of us should inspire and look up to that

[51:40]every single one of us should want the relationship between khadija and

[51:44]rasulullah a relationship of love and respect let me read you some

[51:47]poetry that is attributed to khadijah look at how she saw muhammad

[51:53]look at how she saw rasulullah she's narrated saying dunya [Music] when

[52:18]we talk about beautiful poem between someone who between someone that they

[52:24]love look at this beautiful poem of khadija to rasulullah she says

[52:27]that if i have all the money of the world i have

[52:32]everything because she was a millionaire and i have more than that

[52:36]i own the entire world this is nothing if i don't have

[52:41]you oh muhammad without you it's meaningless one look i see in

[52:46]your eyes is worse than the entire dunya how many of us

[52:49]brothers and sisters see our spouses in that way where i can

[52:54]tell her one look in your eye it is worth in the

[52:57]entire world brothers and sisters where i can tell my wife this

[52:59]or my wife can tell me this this was the beautiful relationship

[53:04]between rasulullah and that's why rasulullah loved khadija so much when khadija

[53:11]died he would always remember khadija she gave me everything when everyone

[53:15]abandoned me she supported me when everyone denied me their wealth she

[53:21]gave me her wealth so that i would spread islam when all

[53:24]the other wives did not give me children she gave me fatima

[53:28]she is the one that gave and sacrificed everything that she had

[53:35]for rasulullah so anytime he would hear the name of khadijah you

[53:38]would see the tears of rasulullah come down on his cheeks and

[53:43]on a night like this the tenth night of ramadan that we

[53:48]will enter khadija alaihissalam was on her deathbed rasulullah would lose amongst

[53:53]his greatest companions amongst his greatest supporters the one that always supported

[53:58]consoled rasulullah when he comes back and the people of quraish they

[54:04]would bother him they would throw rocks at him they would hurt

[54:06]his feelings they would physically hurt him it was khadija to protect

[54:08]him and console him and treat the wounds on a night like

[54:13]this khadijah is on her deathbed it's her final moment she wants

[54:17]to tell her final wills to rasulullah it is reported that she

[54:23]asked for her daughter fatima alaihissalam is four to five years old

[54:27]she's a young daughter she comes to her mother my dear mother

[54:29]what do you need she tells her i want you to go

[54:32]and make a request from your father rasulullah because i am embarrassed

[54:36]she says what is it my dear mother i want you to

[54:40]ask the shirt of rasulullah rasulullah the one that he used to

[54:47]pray with the one that he used to supplicate to allah who

[54:49]then read quran i want his camilles to in my grave so

[54:54]please go and ask rasulullah fatima imagine a four or five year

[54:57]old daughter she goes to rasulullah and she asks rasulullah my dear

[55:02]father this is the request of my mother rasulullah says of course

[55:05]i accept so he gives the shirt and it becomes the caffeine

[55:09]of the hadith it's reported that after that who came asma came

[55:17]and she saw a smart crying so she asked him ya why

[55:20]are you crying in these file moments is it because you are

[55:24]dying and you are afraid she says no because every time i

[55:26]see my daughter fatima i remember that i will leave an orphan

[55:31]after me a four or five year old daughter or a father

[55:34]who will take care of my daughter fatima every time i am

[55:39]looking and seeing fatima my daughter i will remember that she will

[55:42]be lonely after me i remember the day that she will get

[55:47]married she will look left and right and she will not find

[55:49]her mother besides her because every girl when she gets married obviously

[55:53]she is honored to have her to have her mother besides her

[55:58]to support her to teach her to guide her but i am

[56:00]remembering on the day of the wedding of my daughter fatima who

[56:04]is the one that will be there for her allahu akbar you

[56:06]see how khadijah she is worried about her daughter father and how

[56:13]she will be an orphan and that's why i read a hadith

[56:35]young girl she would come and she would spin around rasulullah and

[56:41]she would what stick to rasulullah and she would cry and say

[56:48]where is my mother khadija i want my mother how you see

[56:54]fatima she was an orphan four or five years old and how

[56:57]subhan allah the days went and came back and the same thing

[57:01]happened to her daughter zainab alaihi hassalam became an orphan that fatima

[57:06]alaihi hassalam left it is reported that imam ali was on the

[57:12]grave of fatima had requested all the saturn in the middle of

[57:19]the night he remembers that what hassan hussain and zainab there alone

[57:22]in the house so he gets up quickly he goes back to

[57:26]the house who does he see he sees his daughter zainab is

[57:32]crying all alone in a corner amir al-mu'manin goes to zainabi tells

[57:38]her my dear daughter zainab why are you crying she says because

[57:48]i woke up i did not find my mother fatima besides me

[57:53]you would imagine i go to amir al-manin and he would comfort

[57:58]me but i did not find you yeah neither [Music] [Music] [Music]

[58:49]foreign

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التالي

Lessons from The Marriage of The Prophet & Sayeda Khadijah - Sayed Ahmed Al-Qazwini

Transcript

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استكشاف المزيد

يرجى ملاحظة أنه إذا كان عمرك أقل من 18 عامًا ، فلن تتمكن من الوصول إلى هذا الموقع.

التالي

Lessons from The Marriage of The Prophet & Sayeda Khadijah - Sayed Ahmed Al-Qazwini

Transcript

التالي

استكشاف المزيد

اختيار طريقة الدفع

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