Ah! | Ali Reza Panahian

“Ah!”

All of your life is indebted to these moments!


See, my friends, I want to tell you something. During these moments when you are listening to a lecture, whether I who am not a good speaker talks, or a decent person talks, release your heart. Suddenly a person sighs from inside his heart and says, “Ah! I have lost so much!” Or, he sighs from his heart and says, “I would really like to reach that spiritual station!” All of your life is indebted to these moments! Don’t say, “I went to a speech and became motivated. When I came out I became despondent again.” God doesn’t forget these moments.
God is willing to forgive thousands of your sins, thousands of your wrong desires, and thousands of your pursuing your carnal desires. God is kind. He says, “My servant came once and said, ‘Ah! I wished l loved God that much.’ Angels, adjust everything based on this single ‘Ah.’”
Struggle hard to be able to go to a gathering where it can prompt an ‘Ah’ from inside you. Say, “Nice! I went and sighed, burned, felt sorry for my past, and wished for good things.” God is witness that if you sigh once, even if it isn’t manifested in you and you become a bad person later on, this will still affect your next generation!
God is witness that if you sigh for good things, it sometimes even affects those around you. You may try to move away from God till the end of your life, but He says, “No, do you remember how you sighed the last night of the month of Ramadan? I won’t let you go!” You say, “God, leave me alone! At that time, I got caught up in it and sighed.” God says, “No! That was beautiful for Me. I won’t forget that.” The Holy Prophet (s) said, “Benefit from the gardens of Heaven.” People asked, “Where are Heaven’s gardens?” He replied, “The gatherings where they remember God.” These gatherings remind you of good things. Suddenly, you say deeply, “I wish I was like that!”
Friends, the martyrs became a martyr in this same way. [During the war,] I witnessed this. In a gathering, he longed for it and he longed for God. God would say, “Angels! He longed for it and said, ‘That’s not bad!’ work on him.” Then, the person would say, “No, I’m not trying to become a martyr.” But, God twisted his life, took him and made him fall in love more and more. Then he would cry, “God, when will You take me to Yourself?” Do you know when this happened and you showed your true feelings?! Remember you said in that gathering, “I wish at the moment when I am becoming a martyr, Imam Mahdi puts my head on his lap!” Done! There’s a light in you! A tradition says, “If God wants to make a servant grow, it will start from a small luminous spot.”
Imam Sadiq (‘a) said, “Whenever the Almighty God wants good for a servant, He will create a luminous spot in his heart…” [Osul Kafi, vol. 1, p. 166]
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