53 المشاهدات· 24/03/22

MYC Media
مشتركين

في محاضرات

Recorded 5/6/2016 at the WISE Academy in Dearborn Heights, MI
Muslim Youth Connection - MYConline.org

أظهر المزيد

Transcript

[0:02]all praise be to Allah the lord of the worlds and may

[0:06]his peace and blessings be on the Beloved prophet in Immaculate before

[0:14]you know I had a discussion planned and outline and the sister

[0:19]right now made a comment you know I've been doing um intervention

[0:25]programs for the last 10 years starting with wise I was inspired

[0:27]I went to the camp the camp that they are that she

[0:31]just promoted I went to that camp about 10 years ago and

[0:34]inspired me that was one of the first times I met um

[0:38]Haj Hassan and S kazini and others the comment that she made

[0:40]she says I was raised with a single mother I said in

[0:44]this community one of the comments that I always make is there

[0:47]no more Abused Women in this community than a single mother for

[0:52]they're the ones that usually have the hardest trouble with their kids

[0:57]they're the ones that sacrifice because they have to fill both roles

[1:01]and they're the ones that sometimes the child then turns on them

[1:04]when they get older and then for them to remarry within the

[1:09]community it's looked down on for if there's a good candidate and

[1:12]he goes to his mother and says Well here here's somebody the

[1:15]mother would typically say no well why well she has kids she's

[1:20]been married before for when we know when Imam Hussein Imam as

[1:26]IM Hassam was um pass was passing away way he commanded Imam

[1:32]Hussein he told Imam Hussein make sure you marry my good wife

[1:34]I look at the difference just one comment that I wanted to

[1:39]make but the discussion today is about mothers and how how is

[1:43]it that heaven is under the mother's feet why is that the

[1:48]case for we know that there's no greater power than the love

[1:51]of a mother for usually I ask mothers you know you love

[1:56]your child they say yes said if I bring another child that

[1:58]looks just like your son or daughter would you take care of

[2:03]him the same way they would say they would hesitate I said

[2:06]would you give that person your heart that you don't know even

[2:09]though they look exactly the same like your daughter says no this

[2:13]one I'd give my life to so then the question I ask

[2:18]him is why why is that love there where did it come

[2:20]from and typically the answer would be well it came from Allah

[2:25]but how did Allah put it there in Surah lman Allah says

[2:27]we have enjoyed man respect to his parents his mother bears him

[2:34]with pain upon pain and is weaning for that pain he last

[2:37]for about two years in regards to the feeding and while he's

[2:42]in in the wombs then Allah says be grateful to me Allah

[2:45]and to your parents and to me you're coming back too so

[2:52]Allah is saying that pain is a key component to why you

[2:55]love that child for Allah is the most merciful for Allah has

[3:00]created you eyebrows imagine if your eyebrows were here or here but

[3:05]Allah placed them perfectly here for when you sweat it causes you

[3:09]to make sure that you don't go blind because if you have

[3:13]gel or other carcinogens and it goes through your eyebrows and if

[3:16]your eyebrow wasn't here you may go blind but Allah put an

[3:18]eyebrow here Allah allowed you like this brother just blinked and if

[3:24]he had to remember to Blink during the day he would go

[3:30]insane but even blinking Allah says is on autopilot even doing other

[3:33]things that you don't even have to remind yourself to do Allah

[3:36]says I put that an autopilot Allah says have you not taken

[3:43]reflection have you haven't you done haven't you reflected to say so

[3:55]Allah says that mental Amnesia is kicking in so Allah says look

[3:59]I've done so much much for you I've given you eyebrows I've

[4:01]allowed you to Blink I've given you two ears one mouth so

[4:06]you could listen twice as much as we speak Allah says but

[4:11]the mother I made her go through so much pain if Allah

[4:14]is so merciful why is he allowing somebody to go through so

[4:19]much pain for when if you ask the mothers here did your

[4:21]back hurt they say Yes Man my back hurt did you have

[4:28]sleepless nights of course ah that pain and then when you gave

[4:32]birth was it painful yes very painful if you notice that pain

[4:37]is the reason why you love that child so much and the

[4:40]proof is when there's illegitimate PR children born and now the child

[4:44]has to stay with the mother or the father who does the

[4:49]child stay with 90% of the time the mother why is it

[4:54]not 5050 or at least 6040 why is it over 90% of

[4:56]the time and if not the mother then the grandmother if not

[5:01]the grandmother maybe the aunt why because they've all gone through that

[5:04]pain they say no we can't let go of this one that

[5:08]pain is the reason why they love that child so much and

[5:10]one of the things that we have done in the community unfortunately

[5:15]is we've tried to take that pain away from the child and

[5:18]then we ask ourselves why doesn't my child respect me for if

[5:23]we know you know one example I give all the time is

[5:26]when we're in school and your friends are talking on the phone

[5:30]and when they talk to you they're kind they're gentle but then

[5:38]the mom calls um what are you doing why where are you

[5:41]going none of your business ma you're bugging me leave me alone

[5:48]click and then we hear that as friends we hear that and

[5:50]it pierces our ears for the person who loves them the most

[5:56]they just spoke to that way for if you go and ask

[5:58]your friends imagine myself I go to your house and I open

[6:02]the door it's 2:00 in the morning and I go to this

[6:07]brother right here and I say feed me you would yell out

[6:11]ma there's a crazy person in the house call the police but

[6:15]when you were screaming when you were crying in the crib and

[6:19]it was 2:00 in the morning did your mom hesitate for you

[6:22]would call your the police on me your mom never left you

[6:26]in the crib would you have remembered if your mom left you

[6:29]in a crib for a couple days without being changed without being

[6:31]fed no even with your mom knowing that you won't remember she

[6:38]still took care of you how amazing for when our friends we

[6:41]ask them for $2 they won't they'll look at us funny let

[6:44]alone wake up for us to feed us to take care of

[6:48]us but our mother who did take care of us who gave

[6:51]us everything who would give our life when we pick up the

[6:55]phone we can be harsh to her Allah says that's the ungrateful

[6:58]person that's the person when it when they seek assistance through patience

[7:05]and prayer Allah says it's hard for them because they're not humble

[7:10]for anybody who speaks that way to their mother one of the

[7:12]ways you identify a friend my suggestion to everybody here especially the

[7:18]teenagers is if you you you hear them pick up the phone

[7:23]and you hear them those sharp words you put a question mark

[7:26]and say wait would that be a good friend for the person

[7:30]who who loves him the most he was just harsh to and

[7:35]if I ever get that close to that individual and my love

[7:39]is the same now or I get close like the mother of

[7:43]the love of the love of the mother what do you think

[7:44]that person's going to do to you he's going to treat you

[7:49]just as harshly for we've just two weeks ago we do marriage

[7:52]counseling and a mother came to me he says I'm getting divorced

[7:57]he say why so my husband's too harsh he's been harsh I

[7:59]had signs how did I know he was harsh because he was

[8:04]rough to his mother and I ignored the sign it's just like

[8:07]if a if a boy comes to you directly and says here

[8:12]call me here's my number well what did he just do behind

[8:15]his mom's back he just did something against his mother so if

[8:21]he's willing to do something behind his mother's back and say call

[8:25]me or the girl says you call me and you marry that

[8:29]person what do you think he's going to do to you or

[8:30]she's going to do to you one day thus there's a 50%

[8:36]divorce rate in Dearborn one of the main reasons is this reason

[8:39]because there's no reflection saying question mark actually this will lead me

[8:43]astray I should think twice about it this mother that came to

[8:49]me she says my husband what he does is if the food

[8:51]isn't cooked right or if the house isn't clean in a particular

[8:55]way he makes me run from wall to wall and then when

[9:00]I when I run and if I hesitate then and I can't

[9:04]run anymore cuz I have to run for two hours he will

[9:06]pick me up why does he do this because her parents are

[9:12]in Lebanon she's basically like an orphan here and he knows that

[9:17]he takes advantage of her he picks me up says now I'm

[9:19]going to hit you and if you raise your hand I'm going

[9:24]to hit you even more he would spit in her face and

[9:26]hit her why did this happen how does that person come from

[9:33]a Muslim family end up abusing somebody who's got no protection how

[9:37]does that happen we're going to talk about that inshallah and try

[9:40]to reflect what are the the the basic reflection points of a

[9:45]human being and how do they end up like that or how

[9:47]do they end up in the other Spectrum where they're elevated and

[9:52]they're close to their mother one basic Reflection Point that we should

[9:56]all understand I use it many times with the students that we

[9:58]teach at wise is Imagine an obese person he about 800 lb

[10:04]it's 2:00 in the morning he wakes up because he's hungry doesn't

[10:12]wake up because he's scared he wakes up because he's hungry he

[10:16]goes he opens up the fridge B this what I'm about to

[10:23]tell you you could apply to every facet of your life he

[10:25]opens up the fridge and he sees cupcake he says M cupcake

[10:32]so his tabia his animalistic side because we all have two sides

[10:38]to us the tabia side and the fitra side the spiritual side

[10:42]so this tabia says cupcake eat it it tastes good he's about

[10:46]to eat it but then his fitra comes in it says cupcake

[10:51]you just ate 18 cupcakes 3 hours ago you're 800 lb you're

[10:59]being excessive put it back and as soon as he starts listening

[11:04]to his F which is in the dimension of him controlling his

[11:07]T and he puts his cupcake back what will happen to him

[11:12]he will lose weight he'll get the benefits but as long as

[11:15]he keeps listening to his animalistic side and he ignores his F

[11:18]Allah says your heart becomes hard and then that's how you end

[11:23]up abusing a woman another Reflection Point because the first rule of

[11:29]Islam is not praying it's not relying on Allah it's to it's

[11:32]to reflect here's another Reflection Point imagine walking into a restaurant you

[11:39]see a beautiful waiter or waitress and it's let's say Red Lobster

[11:44]red you walk into Red Lobster say wow I hope that's my

[11:50]waitress or waiter you get the waiter waitress and you say do

[11:54]you guys sell crab or do you offer crab or do you

[11:59]you know do you have crab or do you you know do

[12:00]you um give crab whatever he says basically the the wait the

[12:06]waitress the waitress response says yes we serve or do you serve

[12:08]crab and the waitress responds I just killed the joke the waitress

[12:13]respond says yes we serve all kind of people sit down like

[12:17]whoa so you ask for crab she brings you fish you ask

[12:22]for lemonade she brings you a popsicle like what is this and

[12:28]then in a receipt you look and you say it's a 40%

[12:30]mandatory tip what just happened that person and when we watch TV

[12:37]when we listen to these actresses actresses when we listen to these

[12:40]M musicians they're telling us that's the most beautiful person but as

[12:44]soon as you transact with them and you say wow I thought

[12:49]that person was beautiful what did they just become ugly now let's

[12:52]reverse it you walk into a restaurant you see a guy's got

[12:58]you know those big earrings those ear VES he's got tattoos all

[13:01]over his face he looks rough and you're like I hope this

[13:06]is not my waiter please God ends up being your waiter he

[13:08]says how are you have a I hope you've had a pleasant

[13:13]day please sit down what can I give you then he brings

[13:15]you some extra things he says here's some fruits on the house

[13:21]what would you like to drink and everything he says it's gems

[13:24]and then at the end he says you know I've had such

[13:29]a great day that this meal is for free says I just

[13:33]want to let you know it's free well that person that we

[13:37]just thought is ugly what did they just become beautiful so who's

[13:42]the best human being it's not Kobe Bryant it's not LeBron James

[13:46]trust me LeBron James wouldn't give you two bucks you know I

[13:50]know people who know Kobe Bryant personally and he said how rude

[13:56]and crude that this person could be but we admire him we

[13:58]should admire him for playing basketball basetball but that's about it when

[14:01]it comes to morality that's what the prophets are for that's what

[14:04]the imams we don't look for them because that's the same as

[14:08]looking at that beautiful waitress and thinking she's going to guide us

[14:13]look we watch sports all the time if you watch there's a

[14:16]commercial and if you uh the Golden State was playing Portland um

[14:23]the heat are playing some other team and there's about four or

[14:27]five teams if you watch watch there's a commercial it's been playing

[14:34]for 12 years they just retired it 12 years of this message

[14:39]in your head commercial goes as follows there's an older guy he

[14:44]tells inside jokes to complete strangers he makes the Dal La Lama

[14:48]laugh he's got beautiful women around them he says you want to

[14:54]be like me he says well what I do is I don't

[14:55]always drink beer but I I drink but when I do I

[15:03]drink the sakis what's the message if you want to be like

[15:06]this person drink beer that commercial just got retired 12 years during

[15:10]the Super Bowl during the NBA so many mixed messages out there

[15:15]that we need to reflect on and say uhuh so that's why

[15:18]when we say when a girl comes up to you and says

[15:22]call me text me now just like that waiter that person who

[15:27]you thought was beautiful now just became ugly where then in the

[15:33]reverse just a week ago there's a Brother last year came to

[15:35]me he says I want to get married I'm ready I said

[15:39]he says I don't want to do it the Haram way I

[15:43]want to do it the right way all my friends do it

[15:46]their way and so many of them end up divorced I don't

[15:48]want it that way I said did you pray to Allah he

[15:53]says yes I said then wait be patient one year he was

[15:58]patient he found a sister in school she has no idea that

[16:03]he exists he called the father or he had somebody call the

[16:06]father on his behalf the father was so impressed on the way

[16:12]this boy approached even though he's not wealthy even though he struggling

[16:17]school to become a doctor this gem that he has his at

[16:19]home the father he allowed her to marry look he did it

[16:25]the right way when I deal with you know mothers who are

[16:28]going through big battles with their husbands and I look at them

[16:34]I said when you were married some of them don't wear hijab

[16:36]properly or don't wear hijab at all or it's not so much

[16:40]about hijab it's the way they dress themselves I said when you

[16:43]got married or when you were getting married how did you dress

[16:49]you know she says well I dressed provocatively dressed tight clothes I

[16:52]said then what did you think you were going to attract you

[16:57]you're going to look at somebody somebody who's looking at you physically

[17:00]not spiritually and now that person just like the Habit if we

[17:06]have a bad habit a 12-year-old looks at a woman who's not

[17:09]dressed properly and he catches his eye and then he goes after

[17:12]her and then another woman and then another woman and now he

[17:17]finds one girl he says okay we'll get married so now he's

[17:21]had this bad habit since the age of 13 where he's constantly

[17:24]looking now he's told to Humble himself don't jump around he gets

[17:29]married he's 28 29 to this poor girl who has no idea

[17:34]what she's getting herself into then they end up two three years

[17:36]later you find out he's cheating on her you find out he's

[17:41]doing things behind his back why because at the age of 13

[17:45]he picked up this bad habit for in Islam we teach that

[17:47]prevention is better than cure for if you do it Allah's way

[17:53]you'll be successful you do it your way you're going to suffer

[17:55]so if you have friends that you know when they speak to

[18:00]their Mom they're harsh if you have somebody coming up to you

[18:02]directly you put a question mark you put those friends now your

[18:05]pool of friends have just shrunk now you have a few and

[18:11]the way you know this reality is let's say now you start

[18:14]becoming closer to Allah you don't want to talk back to your

[18:18]mom you don't want to be harsh to her you want to

[18:21]be more pleasant you want to be more giving you want to

[18:23]do your bed you want to take out the garbage and your

[18:27]friends see this now you've elevated yourself me and brother a who's

[18:31]here with us I was telling him and he was also agreeing

[18:34]he said I said what happens when you try to become here

[18:38]and your friends are down here your friends have two options either

[18:42]become here like you or bring you down and what do most

[18:49]friends do bring you down Therefore your pool of friends is very

[18:53]small and that's just the reality of life and how do we

[18:59]know for the prophet had very few for S kazini was here

[19:01]a week ago or two weeks ago he was speaking about how

[19:05]had 6,000 companions but he said I had a few friends Imam

[19:13]Ali few friends why for this reason it's hard to find people

[19:16]with high moral values that don't want to bring you down who

[19:20]want to elevate you there's a few stories I want want to

[19:28]share but to to wrap this part up the reason why the

[19:33]mother loves the child so much is because of that pain and

[19:38]one of the things that we forget as a mother especially is

[19:41]for our child to succeed because if I were to ask a

[19:46]mother your love is so strong that it's been documented if your

[19:49]son or your child was pinned under a car you would have

[19:54]the power to lift it up That's How Strong your love is

[19:56]and then if I ask a mother imagine you your son or

[20:01]daughter has that same love towards Allah towards their career would they

[20:05]fail no no way because that love is so strong well how

[20:08]did they get that love it's through struggle through sacrifice one of

[20:15]the things that we've done a Injustice to is not allowing our

[20:17]kids to go through that pain and that struggle especially through the

[20:21]ages of seven and 14 that's those ages the prophet said make

[20:25]sure that's when they get disciplined make sure that's when they struggle

[20:28]what we have done as parents is we love them so much

[20:32]we say we'll do everything for them with the hope that they

[20:36]do good in school and things are going to be okay unfortunately

[20:39]you you you get an ungrateful child how do you know this

[20:44]in a quick way give me five minutes in your house if

[20:46]I look and there's three types of scenarios imagine the garbage can

[20:51]is full in your house and your son picks it up or

[20:58]your daughter and says Ah garbage can full takes the bottle what

[21:01]does he typically do stuffs it runs away what's the other scenario

[21:07]he looks at it his mom looks at him hey take out

[21:12]the garbage he takes it out how do I know if somebody's

[21:17]going to be successful in the future is they have the willpower

[21:20]to do something without being told to do if as a mother

[21:25]you're constantly reminding your kids to do something the only reason why

[21:29]why is because your child knows you're going to give in and

[21:32]eventually wash those dishes eventually take out the garbage eventually clean his

[21:36]room where if you leave him stinking his room stinking you leave

[21:39]those dishes you leave the garbage trust me eventually he'll take it

[21:45]out for I've met the most successful people in the world I've

[21:47]met people who have worth hundreds of millions of dollars I've met

[21:50]people and i' I've met doctors who do surgeries that other doctors

[21:53]can't do and you ask them how did you get here says

[21:57]oh when I was young this is the way I was they

[22:00]sh they shared this characteristic and it's absurd for a mother to

[22:04]do that and I'll prove it imagine your child goes to the

[22:09]gym and they want to strengthen themselves and they say Okay I

[22:13]want to become stronger but then the mother comes says no Habib

[22:17]let me do it for you I don't want you to struggle

[22:21]what would the child say no way I need it because the

[22:28]only way to become stronger is by me struggling ma don't take

[22:31]that away from me unfortunately when it comes home we take that

[22:35]away from him where the child keeps whining until he gets what

[22:40]he wants and then he gets it and then we listen because

[22:41]we cave in you know I'm going to tell you when your

[22:46]children become older they're going to complain ma why did you make

[22:49]it so easy why did you make my life look now I'm

[22:54]suffering for I tell a child put the video games down why

[22:55]I said imagine when you get older and your child comes to

[23:01]you and you get married and your child comes to you and

[23:03]says M I want a dad I want a brand new car

[23:06]and I deserve it why because I'm getting going into Harvard I

[23:13]get straight A you tell the child no why do you tell

[23:15]them no because you can't afford it why can't you afford it

[23:18]because when you were young you never had the willpower to focus

[23:22]on school you never had the willpower to take those extra steps

[23:26]why because your mom made your life so easy for you for

[23:32]Imagine now you go home and you see dishes that are dirty

[23:33]you see dishes that are on the table instead of when your

[23:38]mom says table dirty instead of you saying that's not my mess

[23:41]you look at it as an opportunity to strengthen yourself just like

[23:44]you would strengthen yourself in the gym and then you look in

[23:48]your vision in your future you say yes because of this I'm

[23:51]going to take care of my mom I'm going to take care

[23:55]of my kids for There's No Greater Joy than that it's worth

[23:57]the sacrif sacrifice and what the parents have to do is back

[24:02]off or else they'll complain it's like imagine your 5-year-old son or

[24:05]daughter coming to you says M I don't want to go to

[24:08]kindergarten would you listen to him no imagine if you did and

[24:16]now your child becomes 20 and now he's illiterate and he can't

[24:19]read and he has to work at a minimum wage job while

[24:23]he should be going to college what will your child do to

[24:25]you he'll complain he says M why why did you listen to

[24:30]me I was ignorant unfortunately we are listening to our kids we

[24:33]are saying ah it's okay I'm I'm tired of them whining you

[24:39]go to homecoming prom spring break why are kids are kids going

[24:43]to these things you form one bad habit it may take a

[24:45]lifetime to stop try to change the way you sleep I dare

[24:50]you to sleep without a pillow you'll have a hard time imagine

[24:53]the other bad habits we're allowing our kids to do we don't

[24:58]want that for I hear two cries the worst cry I've ever

[25:03]heard well the second to the first worst cry I've ever heard

[25:09]is when a mother lost her child to the next world that's

[25:12]the worst for there was a neighbor of mine I used to

[25:18]sell fireworks whenever the garage and my mom is here when I

[25:23]used to live in my mom's house his name was Muhammad hu

[25:26]his mom would he would come to my house and help me

[25:30]sell fireworks he was in ninth grade the reason why his parents

[25:33]moved from Dearborn from Lori school to deborn Heights is he had

[25:40]a group of friends his mom didn't trust so what did she

[25:44]decide to do go to Dorn Heights so she took him year

[25:52]goes by this is when the Pistons won the championship 2004 so

[25:57]what happened when the Pistons won the championship what did everybody do

[26:01]in Dearborn they would drive up and down War celebrating well his

[26:08]brother took him year later when they were driving up and down

[26:12]what happened he saw his old friends he gave them the number

[26:19]he says come on we're gonna hang out come on week goes

[26:22]by now it's the next weekend he sneaks out he goes in

[26:27]the car they go have some fun just driving around silly and

[26:30]they go to Telegraph Road where Telegraph splits and the person lost

[26:37]his way lost his sense of direction and then he turned the

[26:41]steering wheel too fast the car flipped the boy passed away I

[26:44]will never forget the mother Grand me she knew I was close

[26:49]her son says where's my son where's my son it's been over

[26:53]10 years I still see the mother across the street still sad

[26:57]still in pain still wearing black it's been over 10 years and

[27:03]I'm telling you even that is not as worse as this what

[27:08]I'm about to tell you it's one thing to lose your son

[27:10]back to Allah because you know at the end of the day

[27:14]Allah is now taking care of him you know the the example

[27:18]that I give in Kenya about four or five years ago people

[27:21]were in a drought in Somalia they had to walk to Kenya

[27:26]and then when they went to the wahhabis to walk they made

[27:28]the men stay back so only the women and their children could

[27:32]walk and now the women are taking two we walk a week

[27:38]goes by they have four kids and as they're walking they notice

[27:41]one is straggling behind if they wait for them the whole family

[27:46]dies right or we have to keep going leave this one behind

[27:52]as the mother's leaving the nightmare story she says I had nightmares

[27:55]my kids's yelling ma where you going what are you doing and

[28:01]the cries and the pain of the mother had to leave their

[28:03]child why because there's so much Injustice in the world but even

[28:08]that is not as worse as what I'm about to tell you

[28:10]it's when we lose the child to sin look we have intervention

[28:17]programs we take kids to California we take some of them to

[28:21]Pennsylvania these rehab centers cost $30,000 a month parents are willing to

[28:25]mortgage their house to save their kids why because that mother keeps

[28:29]crying says I've lost my son I've lost my son to pills

[28:34]I've lost my son to alcohol I've lost my son to drugs

[28:37]I can't bear with it and I'm tired me myself I was

[28:43]telling a mother two days ago I'm tired of crying with these

[28:45]mothers that have caused this problem that have that have this big

[28:51]problem with them I believe one of the ways we could solve

[28:54]this problem is allowing the kids to appreciate you and the the

[28:59]only way you will appreci the kid will appreciate you and not

[29:02]speak harshly to you is if you allow him to go through

[29:04]some pain stop taking that pain away from him or I guarantee

[29:10]you you will cry later because I hear it and I'm tired

[29:14]of hearing it and for the CH for the children to know

[29:17]that if you don't appreciate your parents especially your mother it's impossible

[29:22]to worship Allah and then for the rest of your life you'll

[29:25]have people never appreciating you until you appreciate your mother the one

[29:29]who's willing to give your life for you you know it's funny

[29:33]we say im Ali says what's the irony in this world is

[29:36]we say sharp things to our mom when we get angry when

[29:40]we want something we have a sharp comment but yet we forgot

[29:44]that that was the person that taught us how to speak now

[29:47]the words that she taught us how to speak with we're using

[29:53]it against her do we not think do we not reflect so

[29:55]for the for the future of this community one of the things

[30:01]that the mother has to do is take a step back the

[30:02]boys what the brothers what they have to do and the sisters

[30:06]say ah dishes dirty that'll increase my willpower my room is dirty

[30:09]I got to do it my mom has to do it I

[30:12]swear to you every time I'm not kidding the last 10 cases

[30:17]I've dealt with where a mother's having problem with a child I

[30:21]say I guarantee you don't you he clean his room I guarantee

[30:25]you do his laundry I guarantee you do all the cooking for

[30:27]him every every time it's yes so now we've spoiled the kid

[30:31]you know it's like the example I give is this iPhone if

[30:33]I were to give this young brother said here's an iPhone you

[30:39]could have it you say ah thank you wow you're so nice

[30:42]but then imagine another iPhone that's exactly the same but you had

[30:47]to come every day after the myc program and clean up this

[30:52]whole place and then after I gave you the iPhone which one

[30:56]would you appreciate more ah the one you worked for the one

[30:58]you struggled you won't let nobody touch it you'll put a case

[31:03]around it you'll care for it unfortunately what we're doing as families

[31:07]we're giving it for free and now we we're T appreciate me

[31:12]do good talk don't talk back to me the child says how

[31:15]I never struggled they'll throw the phone they'll step on it why

[31:19]parents are slaves they know they're going to get them another one

[31:24]and I'm sorry for being so forward but I'm tired the community

[31:27]has to change for too many people are being lost to medication

[31:31]overdose too many people are being lost to drugs you know why

[31:35]is it our bar owners in this community are sad during Ramadan

[31:41]why why are they sad oh we don't have any more participants

[31:48]to come and drink why we that one month of the year

[31:50]alhamdulillah for Ramadan at least they're not going but what about the

[31:53]other 11 months so we need to change this and the only

[31:58]only way to change it is to appreciate your mother therefore that's

[32:01]why the prophet said mother is the heaven is under her feet

[32:05]because if you can appreciate the things that she's done and worked

[32:08]hard for then you're getting closer to Allah otherwise you will suffer

[32:12]in this world the last example I had few stories but I

[32:22]think it's prayer time um times up the last example I want

[32:27]to share is a simple one it's esoteric example imagine you're driving

[32:31]and there's a fly you and your mom are driving and there's

[32:35]a fly in the car what is one of the things that

[32:42]we naturally do we roll down the window and we try to

[32:44]say hey fly get out you know you're trying to wish the

[32:47]fly out what does the fly try to do stay in the

[32:51]car it doesn't want to get out why because it thinks you're

[32:54]harming it we are that fly Allah says free yourself I'm not

[33:02]harming you I'm protecting you hold back don't text back don't watch

[33:06]those things when you're alone don't do those silly things I'm trying

[33:09]to free you but unfortunately we stay in the car cooped up

[33:14]thinking that this is happiness and then the angels look down and

[33:18]say why why you doing is free yourself why two points imagine

[33:23]you walking up on the cliff and you fall and you're hanging

[33:28]just like this and then you scream up is there anybody up

[33:35]there to help me and Allah responds I'll help you oh thank

[33:38]God God is going to help me then God says let go

[33:44]of the branch then you look back up is there anybody else

[33:48]up there to help me why we don't want to do it

[33:52]God's way therefore we'll be hanging on that Branch therefore we'll be

[33:55]stuck in the car and therefore therefore we think that that's Paradise

[33:58]for us that's Heaven Allah says what do you mean there's so

[34:03]much more and I conclude with this simple Reflection Point this is

[34:06]a just a story but it's so true there's a person who

[34:09]came from another planet he was allowed to come to Earth and

[34:15]Allah says you can bring one suitcase with you so he brings

[34:18]a suitcase and he says he gets to the gatekeeper of Earth

[34:25]and he says come on let me go in gatekeeper says well

[34:29]God has commanded me not to check everybody's bag so he opens

[34:33]up his bag and he starts laughing at him he says why

[34:36]did you bring this stuff he brought Stone grass gravel dirt he

[34:43]started laughing he says why did you go what do you mean

[34:45]the planet I'm from people kill each other for this he says

[34:50]really says people make houses and roads out of this on Earth

[34:53]it's of abundance how silly you guys are killing each other and

[34:58]causing an it and causing friction amongst families for this in the

[35:02]same token somebody was allowed to take from Earth a bag and

[35:06]he was allowed to go to paradise to Heaven he gets to

[35:12]Heaven Again the gatekeeper is there and he's told I got to

[35:15]check your bag says okay he checks the bag and he opens

[35:20]it and he starts laughing and the gatekeeper starts laughing says why

[35:23]would you carry this stuff with you says what do you mean

[35:25]those are diamonds jewels Emerald gold says really he says yes he

[35:32]says people kill each other for this stuff people Brothers destru people

[35:36]have killed their own mothers for this wealth says really we make

[35:42]houses we make roads out of this stuff how silly you are

[35:45]and that's so true we do things in this world as if

[35:50]it's forever and we've built a house on a bridge Allah says

[35:53]soon that bridge will collapse and you're coming back to me for

[35:57]how are you going to answer

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