The Differences between People

Imam Sadiq (‘a) said, “If you realize the differences between people, you won’t blame anyone.”
Our preaching is usually mixed with blaming. Let’s not preach in such a way that anyone will be blamed and become disappointed. A sinful person should always be kept hopeful. We shouldn’t say, “You’re wretched, but there is hope that God will make you prosper!” It is possible that one may not be wretched although he or she sins.
Imam Sadiq (‘a) counted up to several hundred types of differences between people. If we understand these differences, we won’t blame anyone. One might say, “If we don’t blame people, how can we guide them?!”
People said, “O Prophet of God, that young person who prays behind you ogles women too.” The Prophet replied, “His prayer will fix him.” The Prophet didn’t deny his deed being bad. If that young person heard this, he would become very hopeful. It is very, very interesting. This was really, really interesting.
A person was sitting next to some women and chatting with them. He himself narrated the story like this, “I saw some women sitting close to a tent. I put on some good clothes to go and chat with them. I came and sat next to them to misuse this opportunity!” The Prophet of God (s) was passing by. He asked, “Do you need something there?” He wanted the man to say yes. The man replied, “Yes! I’ve lost my camel’s rope. I am searching for it.” The Prophet (s) said, “Come to me when you have found it.”
The man narrated, “I escaped from among them. Later the Prophet (s) saw me and asked, ‘Did you find your camel’s rope?’ I said, ‘I searched for it, but it wasn’t there.’ I didn’t go near the Prophet anymore so that he wouldn’t ask me why my camel’s rope was there! One time I went into the Mosque to pray and the Prophet (s) wasn’t there. Then, he came. Oh no! The rope and I! I lengthened my prayer. I lengthened it for the Prophet (s) to go and to leave me alone. He had asked me several times, ‘What happened to your camel’s rope?’
The Prophet of God (s) stood there and said, ‘No matter how long your prayer takes, I’m waiting here!’ I finished praying. The Prophet (s) said, ‘What happened to your camel’s rope?’ I replied, ‘There wasn’t any rope. Forgive me. I was wrong and I understood this myself.’ The Prophet said, ‘Don’t sit among the women like that and adhere to the boundaries.’”
This is really wonderful. Now transform this into a way of talking. A tradition says, “A person is hidden behind his tongue.” When you talk, people should say, “He is a kind person.” This is very exact! How should a person talk for people to say that he is kind? Or, how does he talk, saying the same thing, and people say that he is arrogant?
Our preaching is usually mixed with blaming. Let’s not preach in such a way that anyone will be blamed and become disappointed.

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No one should be left alone!

What is sinning?

Why do some people feel proud of themselves when they sin? They very easily say, “I don’t believe in your religion!” Or they say, “I’m not that religious!” Or, “I don’t want to be that religious!” What kind of talking is this? Sinning has nothing to do with religion. Poor person, whether you are religious or not, if you cut your fingers with a cleaver, this doesn’t have anything to do with your religion and beliefs! When you cut your fingers, it will hurt and you’ll be injured!
For example, when a person is not wearing Hijab or if a person becomes drunk, these people think that they have made God upset. They don’t think they have really done something wrong or hurt themselves. These people say, “I made a mistake! It’s not a big deal! You are bothering me about it so much, becoming upset, and won’t stop. Just stop it!”
Many think that sinning means trampling religion, doing acts in conflict with beliefs, and behaving like an unbeliever. This is not the first meaning of sinning! What is sinning? Is it only something that has made God upset?! Or is it something terrible, and a person should become surprised, “God, why have You become upset? I have hurt myself!”
For example, a person is thirsty, and since he is not paying attention, he drinks a glass of poisoned water. Others will say, “No! Why did you drink that?! This acid was for cleaning that certain place.” “Really?!” How can such a person go to a doctor? First of all, he will feel bad. I imagine this person will become pale, a little similar to Imam Ali (‘a) when he was asking for God’s forgiveness. The Imam paled when talking to God, “I have oppressed myself.” (Kumayl Supplication) “Doctor, I have ruined myself. I drank such a poison!”
We should understand the meaning of sinning. Firstly, sinning means a person has hurt himself. I think we have introduced religion in the wrong way from the foundation. Saying, “Religion is a program based on beliefs and faith”, is not an accurate presentation. From the base and beginning, religion is a program based on what benefits human beings! That which benefits him in this world and the Hereafter.
God gets upset about things that are harmful for me. God gets happy about the things I should do in my own favour. A tradition says, “If God hadn’t prohibited the forbidden deeds, a wise person should have avoided them himself anyway.” Such a person would say, “This is harmful for me. Why should I do such a thing?”
Like the story where God said, “O My Prophet, I thank Ja’far. Go ask him why.” It was due to some good characteristics that he had even before becoming Muslim. Ja’far explained, “One is that I never drank alcohol. I thought, ‘Why should I drink something, which ruins my mind.’ I never committed adultery. I never worshiped an idol. Because, I saw that these are wrong deeds.” That was why God said, “I like Hazrat Ja’far.” Why? Because, he didn’t do deeds, which would harm him. Good job. This is the meaning of sinning.
[From the series of speeches under the topic of, “What is sinning? How should we repent?”]

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Be Optimistic About Allah
AliReza Panahian

A review on the book, “Preparing for the Month of Ramadan: God’s Banquet”

Our Book Corner

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#Ramadan

No trying to catch each other in the act!

“… and He put between you love and compassion…” When you choose a spouse, you have to think whom to choose. You will have to show mercy on the person you are choosing. Can you have mercy on him/her? Can he/she have mercy on you?
The family is the place for showing mercy. If a couple wants to find each other’s faults, both of them will be wretched. Whoever does this more, he/she will end up in Hell. Be sure.
It seems Hell is for the couple who have come to know each other’s faults, and constantly find fault with each other. God says, “You have become familiar with each other. Therefore, you easily know each other’s faults. You should show mercy to each other! I have entrusted My servant to you. Don’t try to find his/her faults. Don’t rub it in.” Don’t say, “You were like this or like that from the beginning.”
The family is the place for having mercy. Some say, “I don’t want anyone to have mercy on me!” I say, “What are you saying?! The members of a family, or the husband and wife, should have mercy on each other. We shouldn’t say these words!” He thinks that he is the wisest person! He is the model of all virtues! He thinks he is so important that he doesn’t need mercy! “No, why? You deserve mercy.”
The husband and wife see many of the each other’s faults. A tradition says, “If a person remembers the faults of others so that one day he can use these faults against them, he will leave the guardianship of the Household of the Prophet (a).”
Some people are used to this. They use it against others. They don’t have mercy. You see a poor woman who is a housewife and has taken care of her children. She has many virtues, but she didn’t have mercy on her husband. You will see her resurrected with Saddam in the Hereafter! “What are you doing here? How many people have you killed?” She will say, “No, Saddam didn’t have mercy, and I didn’t have mercy either. So both of us are here.”
The same thing happens about men who don’t show mercy. They will be resurrected with Pharaoh! “Oh! Where did you rule? Where did you embezzle gold that you have come here next to Pharaoh?” He will say, “No! I didn’t have anything.” “So why are you resurrected with him; you wretched person?!” He will say, “I didn’t have mercy on my wife. It is said that Pharaoh didn’t have mercy either. So we are the same!” “I have entrusted My servant to you. Don’t try to find his/her faults. Don’t reproach.”

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A Eulogy for Women

I’ll read a few eulogies for women. Men, you shout too. Women, when you reach Karbala, don’t go forward if it’s crowded. Imam Husayn (‘a) is not satisfied with women being bothered. Men, take care of your women so that they don’t get lost and have to look around for you. Women, when you reach Karbala, say, “Firstly, Imam I’m ashamed that I wasn’t in Karbala to help you.”
Say this sincerely, not the way I said it. Weep and say it. I swear to God if you say this sincerely, they’ll write your name among Husayn’s (‘a) helpers on Ashura! Say, “Secondly, I’ve come to help the Imam of my Time. Imam accept this from me!”
Women, when you reach Karbala, say Salam (send greetings) to the Imam and Hazrat Zaynab. Then say, “We feel ashamed. We were respected when coming. No one took off our veil. No one whipped us for mourning for Husayn (‘a). We only saw respect.”
Some of you have probably come with your families, and the women are listening too. It’s fine if some stand with their families and take a photo. Fine. Have fun. But, remember there was a man who fell to the ground here, and his family was taken captive. Remember this!
I don’t know how some people can put their arm on their brother’s shoulders Bayn al-Haramayn (between the shrines) facing the shrine of Abu al-Fazl and say, “I want to take a photo here.” Fine. Have fun! But, in this place a brother lost his brother and said, “Now, my back has broken!” Remember this too.
Women, when you reach Karbala, say Salam to Hazrat Zaynab. Then say, “We feel ashamed. We were respected when coming. No one took off our veil.”
Cry on the way. When you reach Karbala, these tears will have given dignity to you. When you are there, be drowned in thinking of helping God’s religion and ask Imam Mahdi (‘a.j.) to accept your help.

We’ve been created for a continually increasing, warming love.

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When you look at the collection of religious teachings and guidance, you usually feel they mostly tell us what not to do. [Religion says,] “Don’t do that. Detach yourself from this world. Abandon your wishes.” Religions guidance and commands mostly want us to put things aside. That is why many people don’t like religion. They feel that religious recommendations are mostly prohibiting, bitter and unpleasant.
Is it really like this? Are most of religion's recommendations and teachings really about "cutting off, detaching, giving something up and leaving"? Is this true or is this a false belief? The fact is, yes, it is like this. The beloved Prophet of Islam (s) both warned and gave good tidings. He gave good news. But it’s clear that the Holy Prophet (s) is mostly addressed as a warner in the Qur’an. And his being a warner is more than his being one who gives good tidings.
Why is it like this? It’s because a person doesn’t need to be told, “Be good. Be in love. Connect with God. Reach Him. Live with love.” You know, human beings don’t need such recommendations. Why? Because a person is in love. He wants to connect [with God]. People have all these good features. They are not apparent. They are hidden in a human being.
If you abandon some things in your life, these will naturally show themselves. A person won’t fall in love by your saying, “Be in love. Be enthusiastic.” Love should come from within. Effective recommendations for people are words such as, “Abandon it. Leave it. Stop. Don’t say it. Don't say these words."
In fact, religion’s way of training is a bit like looking for treasure. You have to open the way. Pick up this and that. Pick up this rock. Break that rock. Pick these up until you reach that shining gem, or until you reach that clear source of water, for example. It is like digging a well. Some are very pure. With a little digging you reach water. For others, you must dig a deep hole to reach water. So, you see religion’s recommendations mostly tell us what we shouldn’t do. They’re more about abandoning, prohibiting and warning. Religion wants to detach a person from some things instead of advising him to become connected [to God]. Because there is no need to advise people to become connected. We are all in love and have been created in love. If one abandons some things, love will show itself.
So religion’s recommendations are prohibiting in appearances or at least there are more prohibiting ones. Religion truly wants to make people fall in love. But one doesn’t fall in love by telling him to do so. One should remove the obstacles. A person doesn’t need to be told, “Be good. Be in love. Connect with God. Reach Him. Live with love.” Why? Because a person is in love. He wants to connect [with God]. People have all these good features. They are not apparent. They are hidden in a human being.
We’ve been created for a deep, lasting love. We’ve been created for a continually increasing, warming love! How can we gain this? By abandoning many things and detaching our heart from them.

What does God look like?

“Have you seen God?” Who likes to see God, sense Him, and live with Him? Where is God so that I can see Him, find Him, smell Him, and fall in love with Him? No one says to believe in a God Who can’t be seen. No one says to fall in love with a God Who can’t be seen. Is it possible to fall in love with such a God? What should I love? Whoever wants to see God, he can only see Him in one situation. Look at God as the examiner in your life.
There is no need for you to see an object or imagine Him in your imagination. Just pay attention to this fact that God is testing you. As soon as a problem occurs, ask God, “God, is it a test?” Talk to Him! He is talking to you through the language of testing. I swear to God you’ll understand His behaviour. You’ll understand His smiling and frowning. You will understand His pouting and reconciliation. You’ll understand from which of your actions He has become happy. You’ll understand why He loves you. You’ll understand how much He loves you. Then, when you start praying, you’ll understand to Whom you are talking! There is Someone in front of you!
God says, “You don’t need to see Me. I work with you. Understand that whatever happens to you from morning until night is Me talking to you in the language of incidents.” As soon as someone is kind to you, say, “God, You wanted someone to be kind to me?”
If you look, you’ll understand the reason. In the beginning you won’t. You’ll say, “God, You wanted someone to be kind to me? Why? I don’t understand. But You tested me!” When someone frowns at you, say, “God, You wanted someone to frown at me? Had I become rude? Was I arrogant?” He’ll easily talk to you. He’ll talk to you even better than your friends do. He’ll become your companion. You’ll start loving Him.
Actually, I didn’t ask you a question. And, you didn’t say anything about it. I don’t know how I’m talking, or I should say who I’m talking to. My friends, answer a question. Do you believe that each incident, which happens around us from morning until night, is accidental? Yes? Please, everyone answer. Does everyone say no? Is it accidental? Were they all designed by God? “Yes!” All of them? Do you believe that? Why were they designed? To have fun? For us to circle around ourselves? Are all of them tests, or not? “Yes!” What good answers you give!
Now, another question. Do we look at all of the incidents, which happen from morning until night, as tests? Good! May I be sacrificed for you. You’re seeing it yourself. Then he says, “Sir, what should I do to pay attention to God in praying?” “My dear, you can’t pay attention to God.”
He says, “I’m constantly distracted.” Have you ever seen God? Have you lived with Him for even two days? They have even stated the number in the traditions. If you live like this for forty days, everything around you will talk to you. The ground and the sky will talk to you!
Living with God means that you understand the language of God’s tests. Look what He wants from you at each moment. Look! What does He want from you now? He brings up an incident. Suddenly your wife gets upset and grumbles. Look at God and ask, “Is my capacity supposed to be tested?” Your friend invites you to sin. Look at God, “God, is it a test? I can’t tolerate it.” Cry right then. Say, “God, I swear to Husayn (‘a) I can’t tolerate it. Don’t send these friends. Send other friends. Send friends who take me to Medina and Karbala.” Say this a few times. The next week one of your friends will come and tell you, “I’m going to Karbala. Will you come with me?” Look at God and say, “God, how quickly You hear me!”
Have you ever seen God? Have you lived with Him for two days? They have even stated the number in the traditions. If you live like this for forty days, everything around you will talk to you. The ground and the sky will talk to you!

The Effect of a Mother’s Intention on Her Child’s Destiny

Along with a good deed, making an intention is in some ways more necessary and more important. We are not able to do many deeds. If we make the intention for these deeds in our mind and heart and review those good intentions, we will gain many blessings for deeds, which we may not be able to do at all.
Sometimes, a person does a precise action for a moment based on an intention, and he changes his destiny. Sometimes, a mother makes an intention once in a gathering for a moment. A deep spiritual request comes into her heart, and her whole life is influenced by it.
Some families have had three or four martyrs who defended the holy shrine of Hazrat Zaynab. What pure hearts they had at that time! God doesn't accept a sacrifice from everyone. I don't know what a pure heart Hazrat Umm al-Banin had, or what intentions she made. God doesn’t give such a son to a person, just like that. The other martyrs of Karbala wished to be like him. What had Hazrat Umm al-Banin done with her intentions? What has she done?
Whatever you see about the greatness of the sacred being of Aba al-Fazl al-Abbas is due to the intention of his mother, Umm al-Banin. I mean, she served Imam Husayn (‘a) constantly and said, “I like to serve him in a way that...” But, still she wasn’t satisfied with herself. God said, “Ok mother, it is accepted.” I want to say, “Umm al-Banin, your Abbas was very useful for Husayn, more than others. He was so useful that when Husayn saw Abbas in that situation, he said, ‘Now, my back has broken.’ Now, I am defeated.”